Clive Cussler: to save james patterson, i've assembled this team of crack commandos who escaped from a maximum security prison to join the Los Angeles undergroundCussler: special agent Lee ChildCussler: fixer F. Paul WilsonCussler: and master of disguise Jim ButcherCussler: badasses, every one of themCussler: the ultimate badass team, if you wereKoontz: what about mary?Cussler: whatKoontz: you can't have a badass team without mary?Mary Shelley: fuck that, i work alone
King: uh huhKing: and how much is this going to cost?Poe: steve!Cussler: some would say that money is no object when a life is in the balanceKing: oh jeezKing: THAT much?!
Poe: yes butPoe: we can't just NOT rescue himKing: hmmKing: couldn't we?Poe: steve! this is so unlike you!Poe: of course we have to!Barker: now now now let's hear steve out
King: look, i'm sorryKing: i just don't like james pattersonPoe:Koontz:Barker:Lovecraft:King: i mean, have you read his work?Poe: steve, mr beast is going to kill himKing: yeah butKing: i mean have you read his work?
James Patterson: hey everyonePoe: james!? you're alive?!James Patterson: yeah i won't bore you with the details of my miraculous escape from mr beast's lairPatterson: except to say that i wrote another 12 books during my day of captivity
Patterson: hey it's my old pal stephen king!King: i hate this guyPatterson: ha ha what a kidder!Patterson: don't listen to him, we go back real farKing: no we don'tBarker: boy you're real popular steveKing:
Patterson: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, i call this the tale of the murder of stephen kingPatterson: it's about stephen king getting murderedKing:Poe:Koontz:Lovecraft:Barker: AH HAH HA HAKing: it's not funnyBarker: oh it's pretty funnyPoe: this uhPoe: seems a little passive aggressivePatterson: no no not at all!Patterson: it's all in good funPatterson: we're totally palsPatterson: thanks for coming to rescue me from mr beast by the way
Patterson: real cool that you didn't all just abandon me and force me to claw my own way to freedomPatterson: real coolBarker: you're welcomePoe: i think he's being sarcastic cliveBarker: yeah i know
Patterson: what if there was a deranged fan who wanted to kill stephen king to usurp his throne as the king of horrorPatterson: because that's how it worksPatterson: if you kill the top horror author, you become the top horror authorPatterson: it's the same advancement system as the klingon empire if you think about it
Patterson: this deranged fan is stalking stephen king using events and characters from his own books!Patterson: as if the monsters he's written about are coming to get him!!Chuck Tingle: that's a real problem, old chum!
Patterson: luckily, stephen king is aided by a very cool and smart and sexy detective named james pattersonPoe: is the detective based on you?Patterson: on moi???Patterson: what about this cool, smart, sexy detective would give you THAT idea? ;D