JK Rowling: hello children Rowling: I'm very excited that the trailer for the new harry potter isss the number one trailer right now Poe: King: Lovecraft: Koontz: Barker: Rowling: i can tell by your awkward sssilencce that i musst be correct
Poe: actually joanne, harry potter isn't number one right now Rowling: WHAT Rowling: how can thissss be?? Rowling: that trailer wasss magical, i sssay! MAGICAL!!! Rowling: it wass exactly like the moviesss you all know and love!! Rowling: EXACTLY!! Poe: maybe that's the problem? Rowling: SSSILENCE!!
Rowling: have you ssseen the kids we cassst? they look EXACTLY like the kidss from the first moviesss Rowling: like, putting a fake chin on jeffrey weissssman levelsss of fealty!! Rowling: i don't underssstand Rowling: i mussst ponder on thiss Barker: hey, sucks to suck Rowling: SHUT UP
Rowling: if harry potter isssn't number one Rowling: what isss number one?? Rowling: iss it my archnemessisss Diane Duane Barker: haha naw Rowling: is it my other archnemessissss Chrissstina Applegate Barker: guess again! Rowling: is it my third archnemessssissssssss Julia Donaldsson Barker: colder!
Rowling: isss it my fourth archnemessssisssssssssssssss Jill Murphy King: gosh joanne you sure have a lot of archnemeses Rowling: it'ss becaussse they're jealouss to ssee a woman sssucceed King: ah Rowling: i mean, have you ever measssured their larynxess Rowling: jusst sssaying
Rowling: confound you all!!! what'sss number one Barker: haha you're gonna laugh Rowling: FUCK YOU BARKER Barker: oo! ha ha she's so mad Poe: clive don't tease her like this Poe: she's getting in strike position
Rowling: whatsss number one Koontz: i know! i know the answer! Barker: haha ok dean tell her Koontz: it's the amazing digital circus ep 9 trailer!! Rowling: WHAT Poe: oh yeah dean's very excited Poe: he's already got his tickets Koontz: i love gloinks! Poe: i don't know what that is but ok dean
Rowling: i sshould have known Rowling: you know the transsss women have an unfair biological advantage in making cartoonsss Barker: how do you figure that Poe: clive Barker: no no i want to hear this one Rowling: I DON'T HAVE TO JUSSTIFY MY ASSSERTIONS Rowling: MAYBE YOU FORGET WHO I AM
Rowling: dean sssurely you'd rather sssee harry potter, the boy who lived Koontz: i want to see gloinks Rowling: dean you want to ssee harry potter Rowling: [concentric circles in eyes] trusssst in meeee, jussst in me Poe: whoa whoa whoa Poe: none of that, joanne!
Barker: haha sorry joanne looks like this cartoon about clowns beat ya out Barker: sucks to suck! Koontz: lmao you're such a jax, clive Barker: no i'm not stop saying that Poe: dean's got a point there, actually Barker: no he doesn't Barker: i am not a jax!
King: oh yeah he kind of is like jax Poe: you see it too, huh? King: 100% Barker: no i am not a jax Barker: now franz, he's a jax Franz Kafka: what Barker: just wait Barker: history will vindicate me on this one