this is a follow up to the September yapping session.
I HAD some better words to describe what I'm feeling and thinking right now; but they were all deleted because my fucking chrome crashed on me TWICE. so that's really good.
In short: The fun I was having, being this creator/figure online, has diminished greatly. ASMR RP audios aren't the type of content I'd openly discuss with just anyone, and now being found out by a close IRL, the facade is gone and I feel shame. If not shame then it feels violating.
It feels like I've been seen completely naked by that friend; it's nothing that intense, per say, but it's still something that I never had any intention of showing anyone. Despite being close to them / level of trust I had / what was said in response to the discovery.
That being said- I'm working on an audio right now, because I still like doing this. However, things are very different on my end and won't be the same until I get over it / hopefully forget.