Hey everyone, I wanted to keep everyone in the loop of everything going on. I feel terrible that life stress and endless panic attacks of mental health collapse are killing my art and everything I have built. Im trying to get these out, I promise, its just so hard to not deliver slop when facing endless panic attacks as a sobbing shaking mess when I even touch my pen.
I wanted to properly update as it has been long enough to accept the damage is done and I don't want to push everyone's patience. Over the last year Ive been constantly harassed and have been threatened regularly by very unwell individuals. This atop everything else I have been better at explaining, has resulted in where I am now. Where I have been trained to fear being anywhere near my work and creativity. As such I am seeking therapy and support against that onslaught to better learn how to handle such cruelty toward an already broken soul facing a lifetime of trauma.
For any who know me, you know these last months are not normal, and its eating me alive, but I'm using every window of stability or hope I have to work on the backlog and try to rebuild confidence when feeling hopeless and rock bottom as the inferior disaster of a person. To everyone who has been patient, truly, thank you. And for those who have left, understand, I d deserve to hemorrhage for not being stronger right now, but I hope to get back on my feet and be worth it again sooner rather than later.
I will be traveling for my therapy and other medical needs starting tomorrow, but I will bring all my art stuff with me so im gonna keep chipping away. Sorry for the lack of good news right now, but I believe in transparency especially in times like this. Im trying y best to finish something before my plane, I got time that if my hands will just work for one day I should be able to do two. ><