Reddito’s reaction far exceeded Robert’s expectations. His optical mechadendrites twitched, emitting faint electrical crackles as though his logic engine had encountered a contradiction it could not immediately resolve.
“The first request is acceptable,” Reddito said slowly, “but cybernetic augmentation… are you certain?”
“Yes,” Robert replied while scrolling through the forum posts. Ever since the Adeptus Mechanicus had appeared, discussions about cybernetic enhancement had completely overwhelmed the forums. Other topics were nearly impossible to find.
“If you agree,” Robert continued, “a large number of Helldivers will come requesting augmentations. You can perform them according to each individual’s preferences.”
A faction of the Astra Militarum that actively desired augmentation?
Reddito’s logic circuits spun rapidly.
Regardless of how strange the request was, accepting it would undoubtedly strengthen the bond between this regiment and the Adeptus Mechanicus—especially with Reddito himself.
At first, he had considered forcibly taking control of the regiment. But after a brief tactical analysis, he abandoned the idea. If these Helldivers could conjure laser weapons from thin air, what was stopping them from producing melta bombs the same way?
As a result, Reddito had maintained a cautious distance from every member of the regiment from the very beginning.
“I accept your proposal,” he finally said.
In truth, he considered it less a concession and more an opportunity.
If he could study these soldiers closely, perhaps he could uncover the mechanism behind their impossible equipment-summoning abilities. Such a discovery would be a monumental contribution to the Omnissiah’s knowledge archives.
Unfortunately, Reddito soon discovered he had celebrated too early.
The requests made by the Helldivers were utterly deranged.
The first player stepped eagerly into the augmentation chamber and leaned toward Reddito’s metallic face.
“Tech-Priest,” he said excitedly, “I want you to implant an explosive inside my body. The stronger the better. Preferably a tactical nuke.”
Reddito’s indicator lights froze for half a second.
“You wish to implant an explosive device inside yourself,” he repeated carefully, “preferably a tactical nuclear weapon?”
“Yes.”
“My time is valuable,” Reddito replied flatly. “I will not design custom life-support systems for suicidal experiments. Such a device could only be crudely grafted onto your body. Radiation leakage, chemical contamination, and tissue rejection would kill you within approximately one month.”
The player waved dismissively.
“One month? That’s basically forever.”
Reddito paused.
“…I would strongly recommend standard augmentations instead. Properly installed cybernetics could extend your operational lifespan by at least ten years.”
“Cool. Install those too.”
“…The rejection reactions would become significantly worse.”
“Even better.”
“With optimistic estimates, your remaining lifespan would decrease to approximately ten days.”
“That’s plenty. Do it.”
Silence filled the chamber for several seconds.
Then Reddito began the operation.
After the augmentation was complete, the player flexed his new mechanical limbs and laughed as warning indicators flashed across his body. He sprinted from the chamber radiating pure excitement, as though he had just received the greatest gift imaginable.
Reddito watched him leave.
“…Incomprehensible.”
The second request proved even worse.
“You want your abdomen replaced with transparent plating,” Reddito said slowly, “and internal illumination capable of alternating between red, green, and blue?”
“Exactly!” the Helldiver replied enthusiastically. “Imagine being a walking RGB setup. That’d look sick.”
“To accomplish this,” Reddito explained, “many of your internal organs would need to be removed. You would survive only through nutrient injections, and your biological systems would rapidly destabilize.”
The player shrugged.
“So?”
“You would likely die from cascading organ failure and secondary disease within three months.”
“Three months?” The player snorted. “Who even lives that long around here?”
“…Fair point.”
By the third augmentation, Reddito had already concluded that these Helldivers possessed the same complete disregard for mortality as the Death Korps of Krieg.
After that, he stopped trying to discourage them.
Unless a request violated fundamental physical laws, he simply nodded and proceeded.
It was not until the tenth Helldiver entered that Reddito encountered something genuinely unexpected.
“I want to become a Tech-Priest,” the man declared.
Reddito’s indicator lights flickered.
The Helldiver—identified as Archer—quickly continued.
“I’ve admired the Omnissiah since childhood. Machinery is humanity’s greatest strength. Industry, steel, automation—”
“No need to continue,” Reddito interrupted, raising a hand. “You wish to become my apprentice.”
“…Yes,” Archer admitted, suddenly nervous.
“Not everyone is qualified to serve the Omnissiah,” Reddito said coldly. “Especially fools.”
He retrieved a parchment sheet and rapidly filled it with equations, theological arguments, engineering diagrams, and dense Mechanicus notation before handing it over.
Archer glanced down and nearly went cross-eyed.
“Complete this,” Reddito ordered. “Return within twenty-four terra hours.”
Archer hesitated instead of leaving.
Reddito narrowed his optics.
“Another question?”
“Uh… yes.” Archer scratched his head awkwardly. “Could you also write down the manufacturing principles for plastisteel? I’d like to study them.”
The room fell silent.
Reddito stared at him for nearly a full minute while his logic engine processed possibilities at maximum speed.
An infiltrator?
An industrial spy?
An alien intelligence operative?
Then he dismissed the thought entirely.
If enemy agents were truly this transparent, humanity would have conquered the galaxy millennia ago.
At last, he pulled out another parchment sheet and wrote down the requested formulas.
“Very well,” Reddito said calmly, though faint amusement crept into his tone. “I shall interpret this as intellectual curiosity.”
Archer accepted the parchment with visible excitement, thanked him repeatedly, and hurried out of the chamber.
After he left, Reddito monitored his movements through the facility surveillance systems.
No suspicious behavior.
The Helldiver returned directly to the resting quarters…
…and immediately disconnected from reality.
Earth
The game pod door burst open.
Waiting personnel rushed forward instantly, their expressions tense with anticipation.
Archer climbed out and grinned.
“Mission accomplished,” he announced proudly. “I got the plastisteel manufacturing principles.”
The room exploded into cheers.
“What about the apprenticeship?” someone shouted.
Archer nodded vigorously.
“He gave me a test. I memorized everything.”
An elderly man with white hair immediately stepped forward and seized Archer’s hands.
“Agent Archer,” he said emotionally, “you have rendered an extraordinary service to the United States of America.”
“Cool,” Archer replied casually. “Can I get burgers now?”
“We’ll arrange mathematical specialists immediately!” the old man continued, completely ignoring him.
“For king and country!” Archer declared dramatically while walking away.
“That’s Britain, Archer!”