Even though Suria wasn't perfectly happy after that, she kept herself under control and enjoyed what she could. She was managing in her classes, she had a scholarship for years of study, and Maut-mai was a decent roommate. This was far better than Suria had imagined she could ever attain even last year.
She could always have it worse, as her conversation with Kiznua had proved. It took Suria a while to pry the information out of the other woman, but apparently Kiznua had been struggling for years. Somehow she had built up her runic capacity and her mana reserves, yet struggled to maintain or cast larger glyphs. Instead of running into hard limits of the soul, she was limited by either willpower or focus, leading to inconsistent spellcasting.
There was nothing Suria could really do about that, and she didn't feel like just talking had done that much. She hadn't done half as good a job as Orinyan, yet it still seemed to make a difference. Whenever she saw Kiznua around campus, the other woman would give her a shy little wave.
As the days continued, Suria became more and more familiar with Darkmoon University and its quirks. Back at home, farming had required consistent work, so the days were divided into a week with one normalized saintsday at the end. In the Taedric Colonies, and apparently a lot of places across the northern continents, they used a less consistent schedule.
The result was eleven days of uninterrupted classes followed by a three day saintsday vacation, which many students were looking forward to. Despite the challenges, Suria was still hungry to learn more, and was actually a little disappointed that the break was coming up. She could stay on campus and do more reading, however, so it shouldn't be unpleasant.
She'd come to know the campus much better, recognizing all the buildings even if she hadn't entered all of them. There was a moor behind the Hall of Thrones that she had yet to touch, and she hadn't ventured further into the woods than Skypiercer Tower. With so many buildings, she tried to stick with those that mattered to her daily life so that she could focus on learning. Even the strange staircase that spiraled above the campus became just another landmark.
And yet, despite her growing familiarity, the school could still surprise her. One day when she was walking through the fragmented arches in the north, she stepped around one and discovered a living statue built into the wall. It spoke to her quite politely, though it didn't seem to have much to say. When Suria asked other students, they swore it had been there all along, just tucked away into an alcove. The rumors of secrets and hidden passages across campus were apparently true, at least some of them.
Sometimes the surprises were a bit darker. One night while returning from the supply store, she got lost within the maze of dormitories and suddenly found herself facing what looked like a cavern. A massive hole simply opened up in the wall, leading to a tunnel that seemed to pierce into the bowels of the earth. As if a den of monsters opened directly into the heart of campus.
Suria didn't consider exploring for a second; she simply retreated backwards and left.
The next day she considered asking someone about it, but then her next talismans class proved surprisingly important. After a long time learning simple practical skills and discussing the market for different kinds of artifacts, the professor announced that it was time to make commercial talismans.
"Generally speaking," the lecturer said, "mages can only use glyphs that they themselves have created. By far the most common exception is a runic structure that we call an adapter. It provides a channel for other mana to enter a glyph, and generally it only takes one to make a glyph usable. We don't teach it to most students because it makes the rest of the glyph far more unstable, so it's a risk unless your work is impeccable."
They went on to discuss the risks and costs, but Suria understood instinctively. Adding an adapter to a glyph cost more runes, hence the adapted version of a spell would always be weaker than an original could be. Even before considering the stability cost, it used up more runes and occupied a space that could otherwise be taken by an enhancement.
The adapter structure proved to be a simple trapezoid, attaching to one side of a runic square and then narrowing away from the glyph. Suria thought it would be effortless until she actually tried it and the runes immediately broke apart.
She was accustomed to forming her runes with the end of her stylus, making each one pristine and identical. But to form a trapezoid, the outer mark couldn't be a full rune, it needed to be an abbreviated line cut by one tip of the stylus. When she tried, the mana skewed her line, or it ended up too short and leaked, or the whole structure fell apart.
Up to that point, Suria had been challenged at times, whether with new ideas or new inscriptions. This was the first time that she dedicated herself intensely to a magical art and couldn't crack it, despite all her effort. She even asked if the problem was that she was making the trapezoid alone, since she didn't have the capacity to attach it to a real glyph, but apparently the skill was just hard to master.
As she stared at her failed adapters in frustration, Suria realized that she had been neglecting one of her objectives. Maybe she was avoiding a difficult task, but she decided that now was a good time to seek out an inscription she likely needed. In a sense she had been avoiding that objective because of what pursuing it would mean for her future.
"Professor, I'm having problems with locked doors," she said when she approached the head of the room. "Everyone tells me unlocking inscriptions are disreputable, but surely maintenance staff need a way to open them, for malfunctioning locks if nothing else."
"They're not illegal or anything," the old man told her carefully. "But I think you can see why we don't want students running around unlocking anything they please."
"Surely anything important is behind stronger security?"
"Heh, I was thinking about students playing pranks with one another. Yes, of course real security won't be taken down by a single unlocking inscription. Direct locks are more common in wards than you might think, however. It's an old and well-tested spell, compatible with almost any other effects a client might want..."
As soon as he started talking about the practical elements, Suria knew she had him. When he pulled out a simple lock, she helped her case by casting her locking inscription on it. She stayed patient and asked the appropriate questions until at last he offered to teach her an unlocking inscription.
It wasn't the easiest inscription she'd ever learned, but it wasn't any great secret, either. By the end of class Suria had the core of the technique committed to memory, and she was confident that she could fully master it within a few days. That was one of her objectives finally down, which made her feel a little better about all the recent obstacles.
On the last day of classes, the campus began to empty out. Most students weren't going far, since there were only a few saintsdays in a row, but many seemed to view this as an opportunity to explore Darmkael and all of its pleasures. For her part, Suria was just glad to have more and more of the campus to herself.
There might not be many people to spend it with, especially if Maut-mai left to some high society gathering. Suria had tried to spend more time with Orinyan, but the way their schedules worked out, they were only friendly at a distance. Kiznua would sometimes come to eat with her, but the other woman never said anything and looked terrified whenever someone tried to engage her in conversation. The only time Suria had drawn her out of her shell was when she'd asked for information about school buildings, which Kiznua could rattle off smoothly.
So as the first official saintsday began, Suria contentedly went to the library and enjoyed the ease of acquiring some more books. Discussions in class had given her dozens of book titles that, if they weren't as good as her specific recommendations, would leave her better able to handle future classes.
Since it wasn't considered too inappropriate, Suria checked out a book on warding magic, took it back to her room, and read through it while she fiddled with one of her talismans. Making an adapter trapezoid was still difficult, but she was getting better at the unlocking inscription. Just when she was settling in for reading in peace, the door opened.
"Are you going anywhere?" Maut-mai asked.
"No, I'm feeling behind in my classes," Suria said. It wasn't even an excuse.
"I'm not going anywhere either. I need my beauty sleep." With that, Maut-mai went face-first into her bed and lay still.
Thus began Suria's first official break from school, which she enjoyed more than she expected. Just being able to walk around campus, read whatever she wanted, and not have to worry about sneering students was a wonderful relief. She almost wished that her entire education could be self-directed like this, though if she was honest with herself she had to admit that the lectures and practice in class were necessary.
Contrary to Suria's initial expectations, Maut-mai didn't cause any trouble. She mostly stayed around the room, not moping but seeming to relax. Some of the time she read and sometimes she tinkered with her jewelry, which Suria realized was actually a form of enchantment. Her first instinct was to ask about how it worked, then she realized that she didn't even have the basic understanding to know how to ask.
On the evening of their second night off, Maut-mai suddenly released a long sigh. She settled into the pillows of her bed and looked surprisingly content.
"You know," she said, "this really is much nicer than expected."
Suria just blinked in confusion.
"Staying in, I mean," Maut-mai continued. "At first I thought that it would be dreadfully boring, but it's nicer in here. There are so many eyes on you out there, so many expectations. Every spell is a performance for your peers, and they'll be watching for any weakness."
"That sounds... difficult." Suria didn't feel that way at all, so she wasn't sure what to say. "That's how it is with the noble students?"
"Oh, everything is a performance with them. You don't get it, Suria, because you can somehow ignore all of that. I can't. At least, I can't out there. But for a little while, in here, I can forget about it and just let my hair down."
"I didn't know you were under that much pressure."
"Some of them can be so horrible. I never realized just how petty and vindictive..." Maut-mai rubbed her face with one hand, smearing the careful makeup there. When she pulled her hand away, her composed mask broke for the first time Suria had seen and the other woman looked exhausted. "Have I ever told you about Febek-Rai?"
"You haven't." After hesitating a moment, Suria got up and went to sit on her roommate's bed. "What's it like?"
"Oh, home is wonderful, don't let anything I say convince you otherwise. But... Febek-Rai may never have been conquered, but we were never dominant, either. And the truth is, we're weak on the world stage. The Republic of Junn is far larger, the Akrashic Union is so much wealthier... even Nau Qin Nau is gaining a foothold faster than we are. My parents say they're doing Darkmoon a favor by sending me here, but it really isn't just for my own education..."
She trailed off into silence for a long time, but Suria thought she followed the logic now and ventured a guess: "You're here as a representative of your nation, not a person. Everyone here is judging you, and everyone at home is loading expectations on you."
"You do understand!" Maut-mai threw her arms around Suria and squeezed with surprising strength. "Yes, it's just so much, and it's all the time. I've mentioned my sister, right? She's such a genius, I'll never be able to equal her. I could try to make connections, but before her we had a man who was practically king of the Water Society, so no matter where I turn..."
Maut-mai went on to talk about her family in detail, and Suria quickly realized that in this case, nobility only meant pressure. Everyone was expecting great things of Maut-mai, not in an encouraging way, but because they demanded repayment for everything they'd invested in her. Even though Maut-mai was consistently positive about her family, they sounded ruthless and cruel to Suria.
After that, Maut-mai surprised her by asking questions about Suria in return. She seemed honestly interested, so Suria ended up talking about the Westlakes for the first time since she'd arrived at the university. Her little stories about being a village healer felt boring to her, but Maut-mai seemed fascinated, perhaps because they were so different from her own home.
By the end of the saintsday break, Suria wished that it could go on forever. That night with Maut-mai had ended with both weeping and giggling, but after that, her roommate seemed much more emotionally stable. When she put on her makeup before the first day of classes, she did it grandly, like she was putting on armor for a battle.
For her part, Suria had read several books and finally increased her runic capacity to seven. She was proud of that, even though she clearly needed to figure out more exercises. Still, after the period of rejuvenation, she felt as though she could handle anything eventually. All she needed was enough time.
She was afraid her new confidence would break when classes resumed, but she handled them with aplomb. When the discussion in Foundations of Modern Spellcraft dealt with obscure old terms, she spoke up not caring if anyone laughed at her pronunciation. Her work in Commercial Application of Talisman Artificing kept improving, and truly mastering the adapter formation seemed within reach. She was far from the strongest student in Introduction to Glyphic Combat, but the nobles no longer intimidated her.
It seemed like everything was going so well.
A few days in, she was walking around Convocation Hall when pain suddenly tore through in her stomach. At first Suria winced and ignored it, but as it grew more intense she stumbled and almost fell. Could it be some sort of curse? Could she have been poisoned?
Except that, with all her new education, she realized that it wasn't truly a pain in her stomach. This was the sort of phantom pain that sometimes came about when the mind was adapting to a new mana sense. As soon as she understood this, the pain lessened, though she kept a hand on her stomach. The pain was reduced, but the intensity of the feeling was growing stronger.
Whatever type of mana she was feeling, it was growing stronger in a way that she had never felt before. The problem was, she didn't understand what she could be sensing. Everyone in Darkmoon was exposed to all kinds of mana, but that usually didn't lead to new senses developing acutely. There must be something else... something she'd rather not understand.
Then she was seated on her bench in the waiting room and the tapestry clattered to the ground.
Suria couldn't muster enough denial not to understand that she had been thrown back to the start of the loop. Everything was exactly as she remembered it, from the lighting to Maut-mai seated primly to Lirngelf's body slumped against the table. Everything she had done at Darkmoon... gone, lost in time that no longer existed.
Before she could stop herself, Suria let out a cry of frustration. Maut-mai turned and gave her an icy stare, which hurt even worse.
-
I saw a few people who thought Suria might have left behind the time loop after escaping, which I didn't intend as misdirection at all. When I set out to write a time loop story, I wanted to write a time loop story. It will do a few unusual things, including one I've never seen done in this type of story before, but nearly all of the series will be within the temporal magic.