We've sent out the beta reader copies and gotten some feedback, so while that is happening, new pages are being planned for insertion. There were a few points where we felt the narrative could benefit from more of a transition or perhaps a bit of a bridge between scenes.So, with that said, I thought we'd share with you, our patrons, the rough scripts for those additional pages. Now, bear in mind, the numbering on these does NOT correspond with the pages on the website- as we are laying out the book, the page numbers change. NEW PAGE 1 infodumpTurns out, people would like a little more information going into the narrative, so we're doing a 'talking heads' page up front to provide both some background, a feel for the story and a reflection of the universe in which Giant Girl lives and how she is perceived here.
I like Chris Hayes as the newscaster- he LOOKS the part.
Panel 1 Partial use of image from current page 1 Panel 1. All of these are window within a window behind the newscaster, so very small and low detail.NARR:Tragedy has struck Atlanta today.CRAWL TEXT: Atlanta is burning again Giant Girl destroying city battling alien menace *
HEADLINE:WESTIN TOWER DESTROYED
Panel 2
Shaky cam freeze-frame of Quar’zz doing something awful, maybe eating the camera. Deliberately monster movie unclear.
NARR:An alien creature crash-landed in Buckhead, and immediately began a reign of destruction. CRAWL TEXT: Giant Girl destroying city battling alien menace National Guard mobilized by Governor *
HEADLINE:64 BIT, SASSY GAY SIDEKICK TO GIANT GIRL A NO-SHOWPanel 3
A line of cops viewed from behind as they make a firing line behind police cars as a recycled Quar’zz from OG Page 1 hurtles at them, scattering men or cars like tenpins. Still, a small shot behind the newscaster.NARR:The alien menace demolished state and local authorities, until the sometime superhero Giant Girl arrived on the scene.CRAWL TEXT: National Guard mobilized by Governor Property damage in the billions *HEADLINE:ALIEN CONQUEROR SEEMINGLY IMPERVIOUS
Panel 4
Split shot of Mr. Big and Exaggerated WomanNARR:Giant Girl is a 3rd generation superhero, from the same line as Mr. Big and the Exaggerated Woman.CRAWL TEXT: Property damage in the billions Former superhero turned treasure hunter *
HEADLINE:GIANT FAMILY TRADITION OF SHAME AND FAILUREPanel 5
4 panel of GG’s greatest hits, from page 123 (Flynna blows up)NARR:Or perhaps one of the many sites of her conflicts, which tend to have devastating effects on the environment.
CRAWL TEXT: Former superhero turned treasure hunter Lawsuits for damages already being filed *
HEADLINE:GIANT GIRL = GIANT PROPERTY DAMAGE
Panel 6
*panel of the studio shaking, the host hands up panicking, dust falling, a big “POOOOOM” through the panel bottom over the crawlHEADLINE:TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES, STAND BY
Panel 7
Host dusting himself off, looking a bit worriedNARR:We’re experiencing that right now, as the battle has moved into downtown Atlanta.
Quite near us, in fact.
CRAWL TEXT: Lawsuits for damages already being filed GNN HQ shaken by superhuman battle *
HEADLINE:
INCOMPETENT GIANT MIGHT DOOM GIANT NEWS NETWORK
Panel 8
Newscaster full in frame.NARR:If you can hear us, Giant Girl, good luck.We’re all counting on you.CRAWL TEXT: GNN HQ shaken by superhuman battle Space knight arrives on scene *
HEADLINE:IRONIC. WE ARE SO SCREWED.
NEW PAGE 63 (Would fit into the narrative on the website to be Page 42, after 41 and before the current 42. We felt this one needed a little more than I had previously given it.)
Panel 1
Profile, Ronni pushing through the shrubberies as Lexii flits around to beside her. Sun will need to end up behind her despite her having walked into it previously.
LEXII:The ghost spoke truth.
It’s because you couldn’t save him, isn’t it?
Panel 2
Ronni cocking an eyebrow, a snarl forming as Lexii hovers with her feet pointed and her arms crossed, head cocked a bit.
GG:No!
Panel 3
Same shot, Ronni deflating, rolling her eyes, talking with her hands, Lexii’s body language returning to conversational.
GG:I don't know.
Panel 4
We break through the brushline at a cliffside, looking out over the mountain range that is Igglehoop. The sun is behind them, as it will be rising over Igglehoop in the morning. A nice explorer shot of Ronni, leg up on a rock maybe, looking out over this vast alien world in which she is trapped. Big panel.GG:In the past 2 days, I've lost the world I know.
I've lost Ali.
Who knows if that witch will even keep her word and bring me back.
Leo was... I dunno.
Someone I could try to hold onto, I guess.
Panel 5
Inset of Lexii perching on Ronni’s shoulder, leaning into her lovingly.
Panel 6
Inset of Ronni leaning her head against Lexii, at the golden hour
END PAGE 64
NEW PAGE 66
(Would be after Page 44 on the website, before 45. We never showed Ronni hefting up that mountain, and checking in with the party adds some tension!)
Panel 1
Kane the Titan grasping the mountaintop with one hand and the edge of the broken mountain with the other as the far side of the mountain explodes, the cannonade and gunpowder stores igniting catastrophically.
GG:Ow! Hot!Ow! Hot!Ow! Hot!
NARR:Can only dismiss so much density from this mountain, or it’ll fall apart.
Panel 2
The rest of the party, having given chase to their wayward giant, is now being overwhelmed by the great goblin horde they sought to quell. Like the hunger dogs, you can never kill them all. Swarm tactics are having an effect and whittling them down.
NARR:Got to muscle this thing up.
Panel 3
Kane hefting the mountain up onto her shoulder, seen from below and out a bit, dynamic Atlas pose. Kites launching as she struggles to lift the heavy thing.
NARR:Even at this size, it’s pretty heavy.Panel 4
Closer shot of the team as the goblins are really getting the upper hand. Ali is shocked to see Ronni out there with a mountain going up over her head as she staggers to the edge of the crater. Halder is trying to protect Flynna, and Britomart is casting some sort of area of effect glow over them, some sort of prayer. Anyone else in the shot is gravy.
ALI:What the hell is she doing?!?
HALDER:Getting us all killed.
BTP:Kane is ending this war.
Panel 5
Party in the foreground as in the background Ronni nears her pose for the nest page.
FLYNNA:Oi, sometime today would be nice!So that's what we've been working on in the background as the Danger Team story plays out on the site. Rest assured, we will keep you posted as to developments as they come to pass! More insider stuff soon!