Carmen Dei 32: The Worst Endbringer of Them All
It was really fucking weird that the Golden Asshole had decided to take up residence in Mount Fucking Doom, Ziz decided. He was an alien brain worm with delusions of grandeur, and somehow, he’d decided making his Lair of Evil beside an active volcano was the thing to do.
Which was weird, because the Shards were stupid. Oh, they knew a lot, but to use a phrase Theresa would understand, they were a low Wis high Int build that couldn’t figure out how to tie their own damn shoes if they didn’t have a host species to show them how to do it. That’s what she’d been like, once. A psychic parasite and predator that was so stupid it couldn’t even understand why killing millions was evil.
Not that her ignorance really excused her. Ziz was going to have to spend the rest of her days trying to set humanity free from the same curse she’d once been a part of. She was pretty sure it was going to kill her, but who fucking cared? If the world ended, her moms would die, Nahida would die, and all her stuff was here, so what was the point if she didn’t put it all on the line?
Which was why she was at Mount Doom. Technically, Mount Erebus, but that was the same thing if you thought about it. Thematically, it was totally on point, which made Ziz wonder. Why, exactly, was Scion figuring out human mythology and symbolism? That wasn’t the kind of data the Warrior or his Avatar should give a damn about. The Thinker’s network, maybe, but that Network was dead as a doornail.
Or, it should have been. Ziz was beginning to get suspicious. When she’d checked on her dad, she saw signs he’d undergone a Second Trigger before he’d been re-written by the Tsaritsa like Nahida had re-written Ziz herself. Which, you know, Nahida was a bit gentler and not a fucking psycho bitch like the Tsaritsa, but Bronya was probably better for her dad than Cauldron was.
At least they were talking now. She wasn’t sure how to feel about that. After it happened, she’d gone off to stew by herself, sitting in a tree not far from the van while the band was on a roadtrip somewhere.
Capri had found her, and with a little effort, climbed the tree to sit with her.
“I recognize that funk. You’re pissed about something,” Capri had said.
Ziz had glared at her mom. It was an unfortunate truth that she really did view Naomi and Capri as her parents. They had adopted her, and while Venti taught her things, mostly how to play music and goof off, he was more of her fun uncle.
Capri and Naomi were the ones teaching Ziz how to be human, and she loved them for that. Even if she did her best not to ever have to tell them.
“Well if you think it’s PMS you’re wrong,” Ziz had grumbled.
“I’m aware you don’t get periods, kid,” Capri had said, rolling her eyes. “But your deadbeat dad just busted out of jail, and now he’s with a psycho who you hate. Let’s just say I have experience with that.”
Ziz had eyed Capri skeptically. But she had wanted to believe. “Yeah?”
Capri had blown out heavily, hard enough that lighting had sparked and her eyes had crackled. “...yeah. My relationship with my dad was…not good. Fucker beat me when he wasn’t finding other ways to abuse me. He was in and out of jail for…various things. Most of them pretty fucked up. And there was the whole selling me as a child bride to a cousin. So I got the fuck out. And then there were my brothers.”
Ziz had stayed quiet, a bit unsettled by just how much this meant to her, but she’d waited until Capri spoke again. “I don’t know for a fact that Patrin ever killed anyone, but I’m pretty sure he did. I know he sure as shit raped a girl at least once. Fucker’s probably still in prison. As for Stefan and Manfri…they just did some pretty crimes and beat up a few people as far as I know. Stefan asked me for money not too long ago.”
That had made Ziz snort. Then she had caught Capri’s eye, and had seen the twinkle. They’d broke down laughing so hard they almost fell out of the tree.
“Have they even seen our ‘house?’ We live in a fucking broken-down van!” Ziz had gasped, having to wipe away a tear.
“I sent him a picture of my bank statement! I had a grand total of 15 marks at the time. He didn’t message me back,” Capri had chuckled. “That was right after the Concert, though, and people still thought Venti was going to pull a Shogun and take over Germany, or at least make himself wealthy.”
“And not panhandle for gas money?” Ziz asked. She nodded over to where Venti and Naomi had set up beside the rest stop. Venti always did…something…that made it hard for people to recognize him. Ziz used the same ability, but it wasn’t Anemo. Not precisely. It was related, but it was sort of like…a veil. Something that used the same Divine power that she could tap into.
“You could go live with your dad,” Capri said when they jumped out of the tree.
Ziz was quiet for a moment, then punched Capri in the arm, before hugging her. “Shut the fuck up. You’re my family. Not him.”
Capri had laughed, but rubbed Ziz’s back. “Yeah. You got it, kid. Me and your mom…well. You’re our kid, you hear?”
“Yeah,” Ziz had agreed. Then made a sour face. “But if you tell anyone-”
“Haha! Ah, you think everyone’s blind, Ziz? They can see,” Capri had chuckled. “Come on, let’s go see if we can figure out what’s making the check engine light come on. You’re not too bad as a mechanic.”
Not long after they’d gotten the van mostly fixed, the Abyss had reawakened, and Ziz had needed to fly to the Ukraine with Venti to battle the horrors that had spilled out of portals and were ravaging the countryside. The same thing happened in New Moscow, Helsinki, the Kuril Islands, and Kazakhstan. The Abyss was everywhere.
And Ziz had a new brother.
She hadn’t bothered going to confront her deadbeat dad. As much as she wanted to blame him, this didn’t feel right. The Tsaritsa had taken the High Priest Shard and changed it. It shouldn’t have been birthing Endbringers. Especially not ones stained by the Abyss.
Ziz made her way past fire and through ice, and found she was the last to arrive. To her surprise, the Behemoth was there, but not in his usual form. Instead, he had shrunken himself to fit within the weird temple. His form was, well, draconic in nature. Ziz could sense the semi-divine power within him, though it hadn’t yet fully matured into that of a true dragon or god. He had four limbs, and was standing on his hind quarters. His body appeared to be made of geo crystals and black stone, and his face had become less alien, with two eyes, a prominent jaw, and even a snub snout from which heat emanated. He was standing a full four meters in height, and sneered at Ziz, who was disguised as the Simurgh and only three meters tall.
The twins were already there, lounging on the raised platform where the Golden Fucker’s throne sat like a pair of concubines in some Frank Frazetta art. Though a lot less sexier and more monstrous. The really disturbing shit were the statues of the five Archons…and who was that at the end? Was that…Alexandria? What the actual fuck was wrong with the Avatar?
Then again…what was wrong with Ziz? She was a Shard based lifeform, too. She had been changed. Infected. Had become something different than she once had been. That seemed to be happening to her siblings, and to the Avatar. Only…well. They were becoming more hideous. Mirroring the darker, twisted nature of humanity. Whereas Ziz…well. She’d been touched by the radish, who was the best of them all. And she had her two moms and one weird uncle to show her how to be human.
Who did her siblings and the Avatar have? No one good, that was for sure.
Simurgh. You have arrived, the Avatar said. He was sitting on a throne of gold, dressed in gold and white armor like some sort of Greek or Roman god of wealth and evil. He was reclined, head resting on one hand, the other on the arm grip. Was that…tortured souls in conflict, carved on the arms and headrest?
Way to state the obvious, moron. Ziz thought, but she stood up and puffed out her chest. She had altered her original form slightly. For one thing, she wasn’t naked anymore. That was gross. Instead, she had made her head far more owlish, matching that of a Northern White Faced owl. She still had six wings, but she’d dropped the human arms and now had powerful talons for rending and tearing.
She folded her wings about herself and hissed in irritation. Who the hell took my spot in line? Why did you allow this! I am supposed to fight the Dendro Archon in three days time at Tel Aviv!
That was all a part of Nahida’s plan to bring peace to the Middle East. It was even a good plan. She’d already saved Mecca, and the plan was for Ziz to “attack” various other religiously significant cities to promote peace and cooperation. Mostly against her, but well, Ziz was OK with the Simurgh being the bad guy. She wasn’t as moody about it as Farasha was, usually, but her previous life as a monster had to have something good come out of it.
I too protest, the Behemoth rumbled. I was to test the specimens next, after this weakling plays with her little friend again.
Ziz felt a rush of anger and turned on her brother, unfurling her wings. That was too close to the truth. Fuck you! I notice you haven’t fought any Archons! I’d like to see how you do against one of them! You lost to Farasha and Tessa, a butterfly and a computer!
Our sister has grown too close to the Archons and their pets, Tohu hissed, and Bohu nodded.
Is she a spy? Or a traitor?
Ziz was feeling increasingly worried. She was good in a fight. She’d beaten Ivan the Sleeper so badly she’d very nearly killed the Harbinger, and would have if Nahida hadn’t called her off. That said, she’d been practicing for that fight, and was a near perfect match up for the Prince. Beating the Behemoth would be…hard. Doable, especially after talking with Farasha and Theresa, but hard. He was a big coward who just needed to be reminded that she was the mother fucking Simurgh.
But the Twins?
They had a Gnosis each. Ziz could sense them. Could sense five of them, here, in this room. The Twins held the Electro and Pyro Gnosis, while the Avatar had the Geo, Anemo, and Hydro Gnosis. They were terrible, powerful weapons, and Ziz knew for a fact that while she might be able to beat either Tohu or Bohu on their own, it would be close. She could not defeat both of them.
And she especially could not defeat the Avatar. Even if he were to give up all the Gnosis, he was still far, far too powerful for her to hope to face alone. Shit, the current plan seemed to be to make Seven Dragons and Seven Archons to go toe to toe with him, and even then, they’d still have to get the help of every cape, god, and uplifted animal to have a prayer of defeating him without also destroying the world.
I was not defeated! I tested them, found them lacking, and departed! The Behemoth roared, making the earth tremble and bits of geo crystal sprout. Ziz sneered at him, but he did have the sense to add, I have seen you suffer only a string of defeats, and at the hands of a child! The Dendro Archon? Pah, she barely deserves the title! She is weak! Puny! I would crush her with one swipe! Allow me to attack Tel Aviv, Avatar, and I shall annihilate it, and the Dendro Archon!
It’s mine, even if I have to wait another three months to do it now! Where’s that Apep fucker, we need to establish a pecking order, and he’s at the bottom! Ziz argued.
The Avatar raised a hand, and Ziz and the Behemoth fell silent. You will attack the Specimens in three days, and gather further data from the Lesser Thinker. What you have provided so far is novel, and useful. The Lesser Thinker is the closest to the Thinker. It is she that will form a basis for the new network. Has formed that basis, as the Thinker’s Network reawakens. Already, it produces a new Driver with this new energy. This is good.
As disgusting as the Avatar’s words were, more disturbing was the order to attack. She attempted to protest. But, the Cycle! We attack according to its precepts! This is too soon, much too soon!
The Avatar made a gesture of negation. The Abyssal Driver is unrelated to your Cycle. It has its own directives, set by the Thinker’s Network. I have claimed you for my own Network. The Simurgh is to gather data from the Archons among them. The Behemoth and the Twins are to test the Archons and their creations in battle. This will continue.
So this Apep thing is just going to get to attack whenever? At least tell us when so we can pick better targets! Ziz ranted, hoping she could get some insight on how to set a trap for the thing. She didn’t like the idea of feeding someone to the Lightning’s Glow…but Ei was pissed, and needed a target.
Ziz could understand that. Maybe Ei should try singing some Green Day. That always made Ziz feel better.
No. You will fulfill your role. Do so, and I will grant you further power. Driver of Geo. Step forward.
Ziz could sense the Behemoth’s sudden fear, and she felt a little bad for her brother. He’d basically been jobbing for everyone, even just regular humans, since Visions had shown up and everyone else had gotten a lot stronger. Oh sure, he was the “Alpha Behemoth” now, but that didn’t change much.
Still, the Behemoth stomped forward. Do you wish to challenge me, Avatar? I am the mightiest of Drivers! Even these pathetic twins are no match for my strength!
Your last attack was a success. But you need further power. I grant you use of this weapon, the Avatar said, and extended the Geo gnosis.
What?! He lost! Ran away like a whipped dog! Ziz protested.
I did not ask for victory, the Avatar said, even as the Behemoth greedily seized the Geo Gnosis. I asked for Data. The Data the Driver of Earth has provided was exquisite. Your data, Driver of Wind, has been lacking. As such…punish her.
Ziz didn’t even have time to do more than raise her wings before Tohu and Bohu were upon her. She tried to fight back, and against one, might have succeeded. Instead, she was ravaged and torn, until she was bleeding and broken, her feathers largely plucked, her talons chipped and snapped, and her eyes near blinded by blood.
Cease.
Ziz tried to force herself up, but the Avatar came to stand over her. Her head was nearly as large as he was, but he was still able to loom above her.
You are weak, Driver. Unworthy, the Avatar declared. He held up the Anemo gnosis. I will remake you, that you may properly test the Lesser Thinker.
Oh fuck you, I-
Ziz could only scream as she was suddenly crushed by gale force winds. Her bones were reknitted, and her body reforged with divine energy. Her connection to the Shard network was broken, then restored, only this time, to the Warrior’s network. She could feel the Warrior trying to comb through her data, to find where her loyalties lay. He could see into all of her Shards, and all their power.
Well, too fucking bad for him that Ziz kept all that shit in her soul now. Unlike this monster, she had one. She could also tell he didn’t have any idea what a soul even was. So, he got only what Ziz wanted him to get. She was Emancipation, and she was free of his influence. The real her wasn’t even connected to the network, just the old shards that had birthed her. Oh, sure, she kept in touch with them, but they were no more the real her than old shed feathers.
It still hurt. Was still humiliating that she had to kowtow and pretend to submit to this parasite. One day, though…one day, Ziz would make humanity free. And make a guitar pick from this fucker’s bones.
Do not kill the Lesser Thinker. But test her. Strengthen her connection to the Network. And one day, she will fulfill the Cycle.
Right. Sure. You got it, Avatar, Ziz snapped, trying not to sound as infuriated as she felt. And if I do good, do I get a shiny new Gnosis?
Make the Lesser Thinker worthy, and I shall grant you the same totem I have the others, the Avatar said, then made a dismissive flick of his hand.
Ziz found her body responding easily. The idiot had remade her form, but what he’d really done is just remake her as an Endbringer with elemental powers, infused with some divine energy.
If anything, this was a downgrade over what she herself had constructed. What an idiot. Didn’t he remember that she’d obtained a divine Vision naturally? Ugh. Idiot.
Ziz flew to Tel Aviv, feeling humiliated and worthless. She really was the weakest of the Endbringers, especially with this new monster, and she couldn’t even keep humanity safe by shielding them with the cycle! A great many hot tears were shed on her flight home, and Ziz never noticed that wherever they fell, spirits of wind were born, in the shape of owls. They would inevitably be drawn to those who were trapped, imprisoned, or enslaved, and would help the captives to be set free.
Not that knowing this would have been much comfort to Ziz in her current state. It took her a good two days to fly to her destination, which meant by the time she landed, it was less than 24 hours until it was time for her to have her “fight” with Nahida. She landed in her human form, of course, that felt the most natural.
Shoving her hands in her hoodie, Ziz slouched and looked down at the city. She was on top of a condo building, one she hadn’t visited before, but it was near the center of the city. Below her, the streets of the city teemed with life, and freedom.
But also oppression. Ziz could sense that not everyone below her was free. There were deep tensions here. Anger. Hatred. Fear. The same as everywhere, really. She slumped against the railing, and felt sorry for herself. What made her think she could help these people? She wasn’t human, forget Jewish or Palestinian or whatever the fuck they were fighting about.
The door opened behind her, but Ziz didn’t turn around. Maybe if she were lucky, it would be an assassin sent to kill her. Save everyone the effort and fear when the Simurgh descended on them the next day.
“I thought I felt you come back. Are you alright? Let me look at you,” Naomi’s voice said.
Ziz didn’t turn, hunching her shoulders and bristling slightly. “I failed.”
“Oh, Ziz…” She felt arms wrap around her, and Naomi pulled Ziz close. She let herself be drawn up, and despite herself, buried her head in her mother’s shoulder and felt the hot tears spill out again. When she finished, hiccuping and a complete mess, Naomi drew her up, hand cupping Ziz’s cheek to study her face.
“You’re OK, right? They didn’t hurt you?” her mother asked gently.
Ziz shook her head first, then bit her lip, and admitted, “Yes. He…the Twins beat me to a pulp. Tried to fight back. Couldn’t. I…I’m not strong enough. Then, he…that Golden Fucker…her remade my body. Told me…told me to beat up Nahida. But, I can’t! I just, I can’t! If she even hears about it, she’d tell me to do it, to save me further beatings, but I can’t, I just-”
Ziz dissolved into tears again, and Naomi squeezed her tightly.
Why did this make her feel so much better? The Shard part of Ziz wondered. She was a nearly indestructible lifeform, created to gather data, drive conflict, and perpetuate the cycle.
But what she wanted more than anything was for her mom to hug her, to set humanity free, and to protect Nahida and the others she loved from the same suffering she was supposed to be inflicting on them.
Right now, she’d settle for the hug, though.
“Sorry, I’m such a shit kid,” Ziz mumbled as Naomi took out a handkerchief and dabbed at Ziz’s face and eyes. Naomi’s own face was red and puffy, streaked with tears and lined with worry. Not for herself. For Ziz. For the Goddamned Simurgh. For her.
“No. You’re my daughter, and you’re a wonderful daughter, Ziz. I love you for who you are. No matter who you bring home with you, or who I find you in bed with,” Naomi said gently.
Ziz had to laugh at that. “Mom, I’m a dragon. Basically a god. Or, fine, an angel. We don’t have sex!”
“Well, Lord Focalors has a girlfriend, Farasha is married, Tessa has a boyfriend, and Mushu and Keiga have a daughter. So, if you decide that one day, you’d like to have a boyfriend, I won’t judge. Just…um, well, think very carefully about who you date. I had my heart broken by several…partners…before I met your mother,” Naomi said.
“You were going to say men, weren’t you?” Ziz snorted. “You want me to find a nice girl, preferably a jewish one, don’t you?”
Naomi sniffed at that. “She doesn’t have to be Jewish. And just because your mother and I are lesbians doesn’t mean our daughter has to be one.”
“Don’t worry, you won’t turn into grandma,” Ziz chuckled, and Naomi sighed.
“Yes, well…do try to be polite, Ziz. I know my mother is trying, but your last meeting…while I appreciate you trying to defend me, you really didn’t have to call her an insufferable old coot. Even if she is one.”
“She said you’d divorce mom and have a proper kid one day! What was I supposed to do, smile and nod!?” Ziz snarled. She’d been hurt that her ‘grandmother’, well, OK, less air quotes, Ziz really did think of that old biddy as her grandmother, had disowned Ziz herself. Even more that the old witch had actually thought that Ziz’s parents would get a divorce just because they were lesbians! She did not regret what she’d said. Capri had said she would have slapped the old bitch, and that she was proud of Ziz for not doing so when Ziz had called to rant at her other mother, back in Germany still.
“You weren’t supposed to hear that, and neither was I. Just…try to be civil,” Naomi sighed. “Not everyone gets to pick their family.”
“I did,” Ziz said quietly, leaning her head on Naomi’s shoulder. “Thanks, mom. You…you’re pretty great. Even if…I’m a lousy human.”
“You’re a better human than my mother,” Naomi said firmly, which made both of them laugh.
“Well, at least gramps isn’t so bad,” Ziz grumbled.
“Come on, you need some rest before tomorrow,” Naomi said. She straightened her back, dried her tears, and clutched her Vision. “Now, if you see a red palm print on your grandmother’s face…well. She doesn’t get to insult you either. You’re not an abomination, you’re my daughter and her granddaughter, and that woman will have a civil tongue in her head, or I’m never seeing her again.”
“Damn. Nice,” Ziz sniggered, and Naomi sighed.
“Yes, well…Hashem gives us all trials to face. My mother is mine, not yours. Now let’s eat and get you to bed.”
No further slaps or insults were exchanged, mostly because Leah wasn’t speaking to her daughter or granddaughter and treated them to frosty silence. Moshe, on the other hand, was mostly drunk, and talked a little too much. Ziz wondered if all families were this complicated. Kinda made the shard way of banging and then committing a murder-sui-genocide seem reasonable.
The next day, Ziz manifested herself into the Simurgh body, which had flown itself back up into orbit. Then, she descended on the city. She’d had a big speech planned out, but she was going for ominous silence today. Mostly because she was in a really shitty mood.
And of course, Nahida was there, waiting. Floating above the city, even as Endbringer alarms went off.
I know the King of Demons wishes for you to fight me, Nahida sent.
Yeah, well, fuck him. I’m not a puppet to dance on his strings, Ziz shot back.
I see. Well, I was planning on giving you an exam, Nahida said, putting her hands behind her back and grinning at Ziz. Though I suppose we could postpone it.
Exam? Ziz said suspiciously.
On elemental reactions and constructs! Nahida waved a hand, and green script flashed. In moments, dozens of floating automata and dendro constructs had appeared, all of them taking aim at Ziz.
Oh. Oh! Ziz suddenly grinned. Well. I suppose I won’t mind a test. Have at you!
The resulting clash was rather cathartic. Also, slightly humiliating. It turned out that Nahida not only knew the designs for hundreds of extremely potent combat constructs and seals, but some of them were strong enough that they hurt. It was extremely satisfying to destroy them all, and quite a few were very real, not simply illusions or manifestations within a dream.
In the end, their battle lasted for two hours, after which, Ziz didn’t have to fake it when she sent the Simurgh body back up to space in defeat. Still, she’d fought and destroyed dozens and dozens of completely novel constructs that used elemental energy and reactions in ways Ziz certainly hadn’t seen before. So, that would probably keep the Golden Moron happy with his novel data.
Thank you. I have established connections with several new shards. Some will be receptive to my methods, Nahida sent Ziz, even as she alighted on the roof of her grandparents' condo.
They were still in the Endbringer shelter, but Naomi rushed forward, grabbing Ziz and examining her for injury. Which was dumb, it was her other body that was hurt. But she didn’t mind too much.
Thanks. You think…you think this will set the people here free? Ziz asked Nahida. There were protesters, some of them very angry, that a ‘muslim demon’ had come to protect their city.
It’s a step. Not the first, but not the last either. Such hurts took generations to make, and will take generations to heal. But you helped, Ziz. Some are already free because of what you did today. We simply must continue to urge peace, and wisdom, until the day all are free from fear and hate arrives. Shalom, Ziz.
With that, Nahida departed, going to rest in nearby Jordan. Ziz watched her go, leaning on Naomi. Ok, she was a little tired.
“Mom, am I Jewish?” Ziz asked. She wasn’t sure why.
“I…no, why do you ask?” Naomi asked, sounding rather flustered.
“I mean, you’re Jewish, so, you know…I sort of wondered…” Ziz shrugged, feeling a little silly for asking. She turned to look at her mother, and paused. Naomi looked close to tears. Huh. This meant something to her. A lot, actually.
“I…it would involve formal adoption, Beit Din with three rabbis, a mikvah with me, and…Ziz, you have to know, I don’t need this from you. Your mother hasn’t converted, and I wouldn’t want her to.”
Ziz cocked her head to one side. “It means something to you though, doesn’t it?”
“I…” Naomi swallowed, and nodded. “Yes. It does. It’s a part of who I am. I…I have thought, about, having a child, adopted of course, and raising them to be Jewish, but, well, I’m not the most observant, and…”
Ziz nodded. “OK. I’ll think about it. Talk with mom. And Venti. I dunno about this whole divine dragon business. I just…I love you, OK?”
“I know, Ziz. And that will always be enough,” Naomi said, and kissed Ziz on the cheek.
Fuck the Cycle. Fuck the Shards. And fuck the Avatar in particular. Data? Screw data. That shit was worthless. This, right here? Having a mom, and a family, and friends, and hugs?
This shit was premium. And Ziz was going to make sure that everyone, everywhere, was set free, so they could experience this joy too.
Even if it meant she had to die to do it.
Damn. She really was the worst Endbringer.
Author’s note:
If the Simurgh has her bat mitzvah, this will officially be the wildest Worm fic ever. She’s actually only five years old, so it could happen.