Hi!
Since the summer, two things have happened that have led me to rethink how I've been making videos the past couple of years. As the title of this post so enticingly foreshadowed, some changes are coming. I think they'll be good for me and for all of you.
The first is that my partner freaking WIFE has decided to go back to school in the spring. It makes a ton of sense, and we're both really excited for what it'll bring. It also means that, for the next few years, I'll be the primary breadwinner in our household, which, frankly, will be tough to swing with my current income.
Second, I've been going to therapy, and spending most sessions talking about work. I've realized that since early 2024, this job has been pretty bad for my self-confidence. I take every criticism to heart, and every under-performing video as a complete personal failure.
I've dealt with this self-consciousness by simply working way harder on each video, to ensure whatever I make is so rigorous, unique, and ambitious that it'll have to succeed. Research stretches on forever, sleep is lost, deadlines are missed. (I lampooned this in my Emoji video over the summer and then went right back to the grind.)
Maybe if this approach actually worked, I'd keep it up; raise my standards endlessly, spiral into semiannual, then annual, then biannual releases.
It doesn't though. I feel no better about my work than I did before adopting this approach, and actually make less money, since uploads have become scarce. Realizing this a couple months ago was an immense relief: it means there's no reason to keep holding myself to a standard that's making me miserable.
In the interest of enjoying this work more, and making enough money to support my freaking WIFE, here are the changes I'm going to be making:
SECOND CHANNEL – quick 'n dirty
Everyone's doin' it! Or they were, two years ago. Now it's my turn!
In 2026, the plan is to spend one day a week working on shorter videos for a new channel. They'll generally concern the same topics as my main channel videos (gender, art, tech), but take a more light-hearted and conversational approach.
Some ideas I'm toying with include:
I hate AI because I love being alive
Revisiting Millions of Dead Genders, 5 years later (that anniversary is coming straight at me like a bullet train)
The least interesting question in philosophy ("Do we live in a simulation?")
Top 10 best genders
Top 10 worst genders
One big unanswered question: what should I call this channel? All of my ideas are dumb. "Additionalily Alexandre" is the closest I've gotten so far.
MAIN CHANNEL – medium speed 'n medium cleanliness
On top of this, I'm aiming to return the main channel to a bimonthly upload schedule. This is how things were in 2023, when the channel was doing great and I was happy with my output.
I'm excited about this, because it'll allow my videos to be more topical. I want to talk about weird microtrends and current events before they stop being current – I've missed the boat on some cultural moments I would've loved to chime in on. Right now, I'm fascinated by this TikTok niche which I can only describe as "feminist arms dealers with gacha mechanics". I think I will die if I don't tell you about it soon.
The only way I can pull this off is by taking some pressure off myself. Most of 2026's videos will be shorter and scrappier and I'll find the meaning along the way, instead of spending months holed up trying to intuit the laws of the universe from first principles (which is basically how my current process feels). It's scary for me to relinquish any amount of control, since I've spent the past while deriving my worth from my ability to pull off hugely ambitious projects. But there'll still be room for some big ideas, and the work will still be unmistakably mine, because I don't know how to work any other way.
YOUR TURN FOR OPINIONS
I realize what I'm outlining are pretty substantial changes. All of this is still taking form, and is sure to keep evolving as I settle into a new routine. Please let me know what you think of all this – if the changes worry you, or if you'd like to see me tackle a particular topic in this new format. I couldn't do any of this without all of you, and I would sincerely love to hear what you think.
(Oh, and by the way, my new video will be out later this month. It's called "The Psychic Burden of Being Watched" and runs about 50 minutes.)
Talk soon!!
Lily
Tryin to make a change :-\