In the middle of the Munchkinz’s living room sat a young and short girl with peculiar apparel. The item of clothing that most people would’ve assumed to be the most eye-catching was the “Dunce” Cone Hat on her head. Nope. Maybe the rainbow colored hair wig below that? Nope again. Maybe it is the clown makeup and giant red nose on her face? That would get you a “Nope”. How about the giant clown shoes that were obviously made by hand? You should see the pattern by now.
It was the brightly colored clown outfit she wore with giant frills and bells on it that rang a little every time she so much as slightly moved. There were other decorations of little elephants and clown emblems on it. Yet, despite it being a clown costume, looking at it can make anyone feel a little nauseous from just the color clash that it was designed with. It was definitely designed, this balance of nausea and nostalgic remembrance of what it was like at the circus as a kid that ran through Jack could never be unintentional.
Which was very much the point. This was “Part 1” of Ples Merci Munchkinz’s punishment. According to Larry and Disi, they used this punishment for their eldest once when he worked for a charity whose main base was in East City. They had a location here in Maya Village, which is where Irah worked at, helping the other volunteers in packing up clothes, food, and other items like old TVs, radios, cheap watches and other knick knacks to be sold for single zeni prices at various homeless shelters around the world.
Normally, this would actually be something they praised Irah for, but his, at the time, 12-year-old brain thought up of a way to get money for himself. He went house-to-house, as was protocol for this particular location, and asked for any items or money the residents and workers of various homes and businesses had that they would be willing to give for charity. When they did so, Irah intentionally took some of the items for himself and sold it to other kids. He would then give a portion of the sales as a “donation” to the charity he worked for.
Irah thought himself as incredibly smart, and involved his brother in it when Tate stumbled upon all of the items that Irah took. Tate went along with it since he was 10 at the time and was told by Irah, “You now know about this. You’re just as involved as I am.” Tate didn’t want to do anything about it at first, but then he realized how much money Irah earned doing this, and fell to temptation when he realized he could buy whatever books he wanted from the bookstore this way.
With Tate’s intellect by his side, Irah’s new business boomed as Tate used business practices like “price gouging” and “monopolization” to corner the market for all of the kids. Irah started to feel guilty when Tate started to take over the operation by giving the charity a smaller and smaller portion of the money they earned. Tate responded with “We’re giving them twice the amount that you were giving them when it was you at the helm. Don’t mess with a good thing here, Irah!”
The only reason why they were caught is because Merci walked in on them sorting items in Irah’s (Now Jack’s) Bedroom. She got bribed with half the money they currently had and an expensive make up station that one of the neighbors no longer wanted. After that, Merci “accidentally” tattled on them to their parents and thus, the Irah & Tate Punishment™ began.
The boys’ punishment started with the same outfit that Merci now wore. Alongside that, the parents told every other parent and adult that interacted with the boys about what happened and why they were now wearing clown outfits. They had to wear the clown outfits all day for three days, and any sign of the outfits being damaged would add another day to their punishment of wearing it.
Alongside that, the two bedrooms that the boys had were now combined into one, freeing up a bedroom to turn into a guest bedroom. Phase Two of the punishment might’ve been somehow worse than Phase One. The boys would also have to actually work honestly to make money to pay 7x the amount they “stole” from the charity, for each kid. How did they determine the amount? They used the financial books Irah and Tate used to determine how much money they made with their crime and then used that as the base. The money they currently had left over was already donated to the charity and didn’t count towards their goal.
It took 6 days for Tate to get rid of his outfit and 8 for Irah’s. They then made a much more legitimate business of just doing whatever they could find and get paid that way. Tate’s intellect helped them with making the money and both managed to pay off their debt just two weeks before Jack showed up.
Now, Merci was going through the exact same punishment the two boys went through, but this time, Jack and the two brothers didn’t know what Phase Two would bring. Phase Two was tailored to be as karmic and ironic as possible for Irah and Tate, and it was hard for them to see how that would apply here with how much Merci has done over the years.
Meanwhile, Jack was peeking around the corner with both Irah and Tate, all three trying not to laugh at what they saw. Little snickers and sighs from their noses could be heard if one was close enough, which the parents and Merci weren’t.
Jack managed to whispered to the two boys, “H-Hey, don’t laugh, you two. Your sister is in enough pain, breaking her funny bone and all!” The three snickered harder. Irah made his own joke. “Oh, come one, man! Can’t you tell she deserves it? She especially hates sitting down, the stand up comic she is!” Once more, snickers were heard. Tate added in, “Besides, her body’s made up of the same material her outfit is.” He snickered. Jack asked, “What kind?”
Tate sputtered out, “Poly Jester!”
That did it. All three busted out laughing. “ENOUGH!” The three jolted back into proper posture, and their mouths closed. Disi’s mad, stern, and military-like face and voice had snapped down on them. “GO AWAY! THIS IS FOR YOUR SISTER ONLY!” The three boys nodded and left through the kitchen and out the back door.
As the three left and Jack closed the door behind them, he opened his mouth and let his tongue hand out. ‘Aw jeeze, I bit my tongue. I couldn’t open my mouth until now because I was too afraid that Disi would lay into me next.’ He tried to wag his tongue, but couldn’t get the parts that were bitten to move. ‘Oh.’
“Ah, man!” Irah let out, his face showing nothing but relief and happiness. His arms went up to behind his head, cradling it as he stared up into the sky. “That was definitely the best sight of my life, and I saw Penny in a swimsuit almost every day during the summer!” Jack rolled his eyes at this. Penny was a neighbor’s teenage daughter, and she loved swimming. They had a pool installed in the backyard specifically for her, and she swam every chance she got. Apparently, Irah went to watch her almost everyday through a hole in her fence.
Jack remembered the age Irah was at, where even the sight of a pretty girl in a swimsuit was enough to devolve into a monkey. Admittedly, his generation took stuff like peeping much more seriously than previous generations, but, even in this day and age, peeping at a single girl everyday made you freaking lame.
Tate nodded his head, “I agree!” This kid’s was doing that with Irah, too!? “Except for that last bit about Penny, that’s weird, bro.” Oh, thank God. Irah scoffed. “Come on Tater Tots (“Stop that!”), don’t think I haven’t seen you making googly eyes at that Ricola girl during that pool party she invited the whole of middle school to. Didn’t you make a picture of you two together during your Art class a week ago?” The youngest boy blushed as he looked down.
“That’s different.” He mumbled. “I actually talk to her. You haven’t even got more than three sentences into a conversation with Penny.” He looked back up at Irah for that last part, his blush starting to fade. He then turned to Jack. “You should’ve seen him. One time, he tried to walk up to Penny and he-” The muffled sounds of Tate were heard as Irah’s hand covered it. The elder brother’s face flushed red.
“You shut up. Shut up right- ah!” Irah took away his hand and shook it. A quick glance showed Jack that there was something shiny on his palm and Tate’s tongue going back into his mouth. Irah stared at Tate with incomprehension. “That- That was my trick.” There went the indignation. “You-You dare, pissant!?” Tate, whose smiling and smug face slowly morphed into dreadful realization, turned and booked it to the gate of their fence. Unfortunately for him, Irah was close behind.
Jack shook his head and followed close behind, making sure that neither boy were seriously hurting the other. It was fine to let them fight, so long as someone was there to supervise.
He turned the corner of the fence to find Irah having wrestled Tate to the ground and shoving Tate’s face into his armpit. “Smell it! Smell your failure!” Jack smiled at the sight, but managed to get the attention of Tate for long enough to mime twisting an ear. Tate followed his advice and did so to Irah, who proceeded to let go of his brother to hold his ear. Tate got up and quickly ran, and Irah recovered swiftly and followed.
Truly, this is one of the best families that Jack could’ve been given a spot in.