Hi everyone.
I’m currently in Los Angeles. I’ve been doing a lot of travelling recently and I think this last trip was a bit too much for the body. I have come down with something and am really sick. Just lying in bed, drinking fluids and going slightly stir crazy. NICCCE...
I’m here in LA because I am getting my US citizenship. EEK! Something that feels so wild and UNbritish of me to say!! I mean duh (for starters our history am I right?!!). But yeah I applied earlier this year, having had my green card for so long and having built a world, career & family over here, I wanted to secure & cement the life I have worked so hard for here. I feel really proud of myself. It's like I did that, ya know? No family connections, just a harrow girl working nandos wanting to get out there and play gigs and look what I managed to achieve. I mean really the more you get into your 30s the more people care about wallpaper and curtains and expensive jewellery and you really sniff out the people that were fake being punk and caring about stuff and who suddenly have all these connections and subscriptions and renovations and family members giving them jobs and I'm just proud of being self made and from Harrow. It's interesting timing too as I have also needed to spend more time in the UK this year. There's a lot of reflection in my life right now. And the need for patience. This year is about rebuilding and getting back on some kind of track. Personally and in terms of my career.
It's like I'm still reclaiming the wheel of the car that is my life after the pandemic. Still. Anyone else finding that? Last year I got to do things...but it was things leftover from pre pandemic and trying to navigate them in such uncertain environments from such low confidence feels.. I mean there's still so much uncertainty now...ironically I type this from an unwell virus ridden bed lmfao. But despite the uncertainty billionaires keep throwing us into we have movement and the virus is less deadly.
Being in London lately has been amazing for so many reasons, getting to spend so much time with family feels like I’m making up for lost time. Time is finite, the older you get the more obvious that gets. Seems obvious but you just start to feel it differently, more realistically. You need to spend time with the people you love while you actually can. Life is just memories. A footballer from the Wrexham tv show said that and I loved it, so simple and so true. It's really stuck with me. My mum dislocated her hip twice in recent months. She has had surgery and is ok, she's healing and will be fine but like it makes you realise your part in your family, the want & need to be there to help recover not just physically but emotionally and to spend the precious time together that we have.
Spending time in the UK has also been necessary for me to turn my focus back to music. I’m really happy to tell you I have a great new music team. I'm about to sign a record deal...gah! Weird right?????! Does it feel good though? It does to me. It feels like I'm re entering the industry which was scary and emotional to kind of get to grips with for a moment. It's truly such a different experience to last time I signed a deal. Understatement. As someone who has prided themselves on being an outsider and independent, it was hard for me to make this decision. The, at first, forced upon me independence is something I have come to cherish, fight for, feel protective over and be so appreciative of. It's my entire living career. (side note isn’t it weird that i still only earn 20% of made of bricks & my best friend is you. Universal still claim 80% of my earnings... crazy how that works right?). My independence has been everything to me. So deciding to sign a record deal was been a big step and one that has needed a lot of thought. It also meant waiting for the right manager so that I can have a proper collaborator, advisor and protecter along the way. A real team mate.
I've realised how much I want to be recognised & respected within my industry, and how I also want proper financial backing and stability, structure and strategy involved in my career. More info & an official announcement to come. But I wanted to let you know the news.
The record also got officially mastered a couple of days ago! (That’s basically the final stage of audio work on a song! like the final varnish) Soon it will actually be going to get pressed into a real vinyl. It’s so funny how long it takes to put out music…but one of my hopes and ambitions is that with this new team, new music will come more frequently from me. Getting support from a label will open up the opportunity for easier collaboration & release. In a time of uncertainty, ai fear replacing us and being used in unprecedented ways for political manipulation, the pressure on all of us to look like actual barbies and billionaire cunts trying to take even more of our data...I turn to music. It’s always the cure, the best companion. It all comes back to music.
I'm sure some of you have noticed I have spent less time on here, there's been a lot to figure out irl. I appreciate those of you that have stuck with me and I completely understand anyone who has to go on and off or permanently off this thing! Your support comes in so many forms and you never have to feel pressure to be a part of this community. After the musical and injury I suffered I experienced major burn out and just couldn't keep up with anything. My soft plan is to re launch our livestreams in the autumn, feels like the right time to get back to it. In the summer you gotta get out into a park and sneeze your hayfever dreams into oblivion and eat watermelon and drink spritzy things. Let me know your updates...and send me healing vibes I am sick of this bloody illness, and i need to go and buy a red, white and blue suit for my swearing in ceremony. Bloomin hek I am officially approved to be a US citizen. It was scary to apply and do the test, but I really do feel proud. Harrow girl for life but like v cool that the time I have invested here I can truly continue with in a serious way, and I'll be able to vote here too, so cool! Gonna have to learn so much.
What have you been up to?
tell me the news in your lives
Love you guys
Xxx