The damage done by the earthquake was something that couldn’t be fixed in a matter of days. Ground fissures were one thing. There were also the tsunamis and aftershocks that added further damage than the last. Nothing is an exemption to its might. Clearing debris, tallying survivors, and re-orienting the cracked tectonic plates are destined to be The Federation’s major project.
The magnitude 10 earthquake had two sessions, with each lasting thirty minutes. If it wasn’t for that, most wouldn’t have been able to evacuate on the assigned doomsday bunkers. There were even some who attempted to evacuate by boarding space ships, only to crash in the end. The global phenomenon affected magnetic fields as well, causing navigation and flight systems to fail.
Billions have lived, but the death toll is at a staggering hundreds of millions and counting. It was an event destined to be remembered for the long years to come.
Sirius’ troubles seemed very trivial compared to it.
His carefully-saved apartment complex was gone. His own two-storey modern villa was also gone. Every single property he possessed since he earned money was destroyed by the cataclysmic earthquake. The only choice left was the bunker, but he does not want to ‘steal’ a slot on the already chaotic bunker, if it was possible at least.
Built in accordance to the wartime standards, the doomsday bunker could withstand the blast of a clean hydrogen bomb; or a blast of an antimatter bomb ten thousand kilometers away from its source. As it stands, only the doomsday bunkers are fully functional. Rescue efforts are underway, and so is the addition of new survivors every day.
He was stuck in this dilemma until Herta made him an offer:
“You can take up a room in the tower.”
The ivory tower stood five storeys tall. Aside from the most important apparatuses, Herta has her own living area. It was fully complete with a guest lounge, guest room, kitchen, rest room, shower room, and so on. It just so happened the guest room was vacant, or rather, it had always been vacant. Sirius seriously had some suspicions regarding it, though he does not want to come off as self-conceited, hence he buried it in his heart.
“It’s pretty normal. You should be able to sleep well on it.”
“Normal…”
Looking around the luxurious, king-sized bed, he lost all words. Its frame was made of pure gold, engraved with a repeating wave-like pattern. Four metal pillars stood on its corner, holding the expensive-looking canopy top. Not even five-star hotels could compare to its luxury and atmosphere.
Seeing his speechless expression, Herta thought of something.
“There’s no need to worry. Nobody will watch you undress here, much less your private moments.”
“...”
For a moment, he could not make a rebuttal. She phrased it so vaguely he didn’t know if she was talking about what he was thinking. If it turned out to be not, where would he have his face to meet Herta’s eyes head-on?
Sirius chose the safest option… at least in his opinion.
“I don’t mind being watched. I don’t have anything to hide, anyways.”
“So you are that type?”
Being teased consecutively almost made him faint. Sirius sighed deeply, not bothering to hide his distressed look, as he turned to Herta’s side.
“Are we talking about the same thing?” He asked.
“Elaborate.”
She wore a ‘confused’ look, but it was so deliberate he knew she was playing with him. Sirius knew her for ‘quite’ a long time—thirteen years that is—so he knew how to fight back.
“Forget about it.”
His response cut off everything she was planning. Herta paused for a while and gave him a nod. Sirius did not disappoint her as the only one who openly fought back against her. Everyone else glazed her to the heavens; only he dared to point out her shortcomings. It wasn’t a matter of favoritism, but a form of acknowledgement.
“I will leave this room to you.”
Just as she headed towards the door, her footsteps halted.
‘It is about time.’
Herta was by no means a sadist, nor was she a narcissist. She would not hold back in giving praises to those that truly deserve it. The Sirius of before was someone she acknowledged, though he fell short by a mile. The darning, sickening self-loathing ‘wasted’ his potential.
She looked forward to seeing Sirius falter, all to see whether he would rise or fall. The latter spelled his doom towards his end. The intense self-hatred has high chances of drawing him to the Path of Nihility. The former dictated his escape from the cocoon, becoming someone Herta sees eye-to-eye.
One destined him to be an experimental subject; while the other as one of her few ‘equals’ throughout the cosmos. It wasn’t his academic talent that Herta valued, but his character.
The results became clear yesterday.
Hence, Herta gave him her due payment:
“You did well.”
Creak-!
Click.
The door soon closed. Sirius remained standing still.
‘Did she…’ He recomposed his mind. ‘Did she just praise me?’
One praise.
That was his target from the beginning. Herta’s validation was what kept him running over the course of thirteen years. He pushed himself to his absolute limits, all to hear these words coming out of her mouth.
Sirius thought he no longer had a chance for it, that it was better to understand himself first than mull over his ‘wasted’ efforts. He never expected for it to come right now!
Yet…
He did not feel as satisfied as he thought.
The sense of accomplishment was there. Sirius also felt happy, involuntarily smiling. Yet it did not feel as impactful for something that was supposedly his life’s pursuit. Once joy faded, it felt just like any other accomplishments.
‘Since when did I care? When did I not?’
Sirius felt stifled by not being able to understand it all. He sat on the corner of the bed, not expecting it to be so soft. He curiously placed his hands on the mattress, letting it sink, before pulling out. Its airy, cotton-like sensation, mixed with the softness, made a god-like bed.
‘I can try it out later…’
He shook his head, pushing the temptation of laying in the bed aside.
‘I cared… when I died.’
It was ironic that he valued life after he died, though it was understandable as most could not see it while alive. The matters of the mundane took too much of their attention.
Food, education, career, residence…
Satisfaction came from these aspects; dissatisfaction came from the lack thereof. How could one think about life if they were busy surviving?
Only after that car crash—the sensation of his bones being broken upon impact—did Sirius awaken to it. That is, perhaps, the most valuable reward of that piece of paper.
‘It went wrong during my childhood. I am certain of it.’
Valuing life was one thing, but Sirius obsessed over it. He fixated over its meaning, which led to him wanting to leave an ‘impact on the world. He wanted to prove to himself, first and foremost, that he was capable of doing something too.
Then Herta came.
Perhaps it was his arrogance as a reincarnator, knowing things he should not have known, that he one-sidedly placed his sights on the five-year-old Herta. He himself did not acknowledge it. But his actions told everything.
Sirius wanted to gain the acknowledgement of a future Emanator, before they become an Emanator. He wanted to have something he could ‘brag’ to himself, something that would make him and Herta share common grounds.
The praise of an Emanator, someone who lived for thousands of Earth years, was something the Federation could not give. His arrogance over his omniscience advantage was also there. When everything was failing, he grew more desperate.
‘What a sick, pathetic bastard…’
The more Sirius reflected on himself, the more he felt disgusted on his past self. He did not feel the same self-loathing as before. Instead, this disgust strengthened his conviction not to fall back to such a state.
He would rather die than act like it!
After calming down, he understood the emotions in his heart more clearly. Sirius could not claim to have understood it all, but he saw through some of them. A part of him resigned when he saw Herta’s unbelievably fast progress. Later came reconciliation, and then acceptance.
‘If I didn’t earn her praise, would I kill myself?’
The answer was clear.
Sirius will not.
Not that he knew of, at least.
He valued life, hence he would not engage in acts that would ‘desecrate’ its worth. Dying once was enough. He wasn’t as broken as to aim that blade in his throat.
Because of this contradiction, Sirius’ fixation grew weaker until he accepted the result. He was so powerless, yet he valued life, that he ended up in his current state. Ironically, his acceptance of failure brought him peace.
Herta’s praise was pleasant to hear, but Sirius could no longer find in himself the heavy ‘meaning’ he one-sidedly placed on it.
‘Maybe that’s why she said it…’
He could no longer resist resting on the comfortable mattress. His entire body felt weak the moment his back laid against it. He had to fight the sleepiness, but it was to no avail.
‘So I successfully failed..?’
Five seconds later, his breathing soon turned stable. Sirius’ renewed brain thinking capacity did not remove the fatigue etched in his body, more so when he underwent such complex mental gymnastics.
Herta was true to her words. She wasn’t so perverse as to place hidden cameras in the guest room. She did, however, hide one thing.
Nothing escaped her eyes.
When she left, she watched over Sirius’ reactions. She saw through his internal monologues, with it ending in his sleep.
Strutting towards the laboratory, Herta reached a conclusion:
‘Erudition might not have been his best choice.’
Sirius is special in her eyes because of his ability to self-regulate. He has a worldview far surpassing any other human in The Blue. It is this ‘worldview’ that made him unique, and at the same time, contradictory. The foreknowledge of this world’s future as well as reincarnation gave him a special advantage—one that he made full use of.
Despite becoming a Pathstrider, she felt he was unlucky. Erudition emphasized logic and reasoning. Sirius’ talent lay not in becoming a scholar, but in his ability to understand the world. He was better fitted in Trailblazing than Erudition.
Herta soon halted her footsteps. She questioned herself, slightly disbelieving.
‘Since when did I become this nosy?’
Her recent changes all pointed towards Sirius. His ‘enlightenment’, in some way, fascinated Herta. Her attitude towards him was no longer that of an experimental subject, but as an equal. A friend, so to speak.
Sirius is her first friend.
‘A friend…’
She stared outside the window, to the vast and boundless stars. Her eyes held an identical glimmer, appearing just as beautiful as that of stars.
‘It’s not bad to have one.’
*****
A month soon passed. The Federation’s efficiency was top-notch. The technology centuries ahead of Earth did not disappoint. All rescue efforts had been halted, moving on to clean-up and recovery. The total death toll was finalized at 1.2 billion, with billions injured. Hundreds of coastal cities were wiped off the map due to the staggering tsunamis. The Blue’s advanced technology could not prevent a cataclysmic disaster like that from occurring.
The global economy was frozen as prominent families reported the deaths of their heads and successors. Transportation remained a problem, and so did sustaining the basic supply chain for food and other necessities.
By this point, everyone knew it would take years to recover from it, if not decades. Some were already clamoring about asking Herta for help, but the higher-ups of the Federation knew better than not to do so. She had completely escaped their constraints. Nothing in their hand could force Herta to do their bidding. Though nobody also wanted to force her in the first place.
The environment built by the Federation made it hard for them to hate talents, more so god-like talents. Herta fell into the latter category. The next best option was to resolve it all by themselves, and so they did.
The world outside remained in a chaotic state. Only the pure-white ivory tower remained unperturbed, as if saving the world meant nothing to Herta. The lucky Sirius who got to live in the same residence as hers could not stay still. He organized the immediate matters—the tower’s maintenance materials and their basic needs.
He also helped in the Federation’s recovery and restoration efforts. The ivory tower’s warehouse was filled with advanced technology she made over the past thirteen years. She herself expressed approval in helping others, hence Sirius did exactly that.
After settling them, he decided to test himself. It just so happened there is an ‘advanced’ gym at the tower’s recreation area on its first floor. There were only a pair of every gym equipment. His eyes drifted towards the kettlebell, involuntarily thinking of the witch.
‘She practiced more than me…’