The October morning light filters through curtains you drew yourself an hour ago. Your reflection passes in the hallway mirror as you carry the mop bucket—a young woman in a black and white maid uniform, the fabric straining across your swollen belly and heavy breasts that have grown even larger with pregnancy. Your thick thighs brush together with each waddle, the sensible flat shoes doing little to ease the pressure on your lower back.
"李美华!" Mrs. Li's voice carries from the sitting room. Li Meihua! "客厅的地板还没擦!" The sitting room floor isn't mopped yet!
"来了,太太。" Coming, ma'am. You hoist the bucket with effort, feeling your baby shift inside you—Mr. Li's child, conceived in the first month of your employment when he came to your small servant's quarters after his wife had gone to bed. Seven months now. The uniform they provided barely fits anymore, the buttons straining across your midsection.
You lower yourself carefully to your knees—an awkward process with your substantial weight and pregnant belly—and begin scrubbing the marble floor. The ammonia smell makes you nauseous, but you've learned to breathe through your mouth.
"你动作太慢了," Mrs. Li says from her chair, not looking up from her phone. You're too slow. She knows about the pregnancy—everyone knows—but speaks of it only to complain about your decreased efficiency. "今天下午我有客人来。所有的房间都要完美。" I have guests this afternoon. Every room must be perfect.
"是的,太太。" Yes, ma'am.
Your hands move in practiced circles, the detective part of your mind long buried under months of domestic servitude. You remember being someone else once—tall, powerful, speaking a different language—but those memories feel like fragments of a dream, disconnected from the reality of your aching back and swollen ankles.
Mr. Li appears in the doorway, loosening his tie. His eyes move over your body with proprietary assessment. "晚上到我的书房来," he says casually. Come to my study tonight. His wife doesn't react.
"是的,先生。" Yes, sir. The words emerge automatically, your hand never pausing in its scrubbing motion. This is what you are now: Li Meihua, the pregnant maid, cleaning floors and servicing your employer, accepting it as simply what uneducated women with no other options must do.