“You look ridiculous,” my wife said bluntly as we got dressed for the event. “I can’t believe you’re going to go to a party dressed like that.”
I put a hand on my chest in faux shock. “Me? But I look magnificent. I have all this fancy armor. And I’m wearing the mask they gave me specifically for the event. I can’t imagine why I wouldn’t be cutting the most dashing of figures.”
“Because you’re wearing their mask on TOP of the one you already had on,” she said with an exasperated attempt at hiding a smirk. “They’re supposed to conceal things about who we are. YOU are a six and a half foot tall behemoth in A-rank armor wearing two masks stacked on top of each other. You might as well wear a name tag.” I brightened, a piece of paper appearing in my hand with a pen, which Callie slapped out of my grip. “NO NAME TAGS!”
I laughed as I retrieved the pen and paper, stashing them back in my ring. “You never let me have any fun,” I complained dramatically. “But fine, I’ll be good. Besides, Bethy will be there, so there’s a ninety percent chance something will be on fire before the night ends even if I’m on my best behavior.”
We headed out to the platform, making our way to Common City directly. We’d been assured in a note under the masks that the Lazarus Club would handle travel arrangements. We wouldn’t be required to spend days off or get permissions. Sure enough, they let us right through. We continued our discussion as we walked, with me tapping into Murmur just in case.
“I wish that wasn’t true,” she grimaced. “But at least TRY to play nice. These people are dangerous. I know you’re used to clashing head on with anyone who starts trouble, but not everyone here is going to respond to that. You always let me do the political stuff, so can I handle our introduction?” Through the bond, I could tell she was mostly terrified I’d be informal to some scary Overgod and get us swatted like flies. Which…was probably fair given my recent interaction with Harper.
I wasn’t rude or hostile, really, but I didn’t like to bow and scrape. I could also tell that she was picking up my own worries on that subject, and that we were kind of feeding into each other in an anxiety loop. I grimaced and clamped down on the bond, just enough to break the spiral.
She blinked at me. “Huh…” she said slowly. “I didn’t know it could do that.”
“Neither did I,” I admitted. “I think it might be a side effect of Angelic Bond hitting tier eight. He’s been growing consistently, getting lots of use. It makes sense that we’re discovering new tricks and even a few traps. We’ll need to watch out for that.” The path to our destination wasn’t complicated, and I remembered it easily enough.
“Fantastic,” she drawled. “Because downsides to skill growth was exactly what I wanted to hear about tonight.”
Chuckling, I stopped as we turned a corner, arriving in front of a large flowing building with a domed roof. “Alright, this is the place. Is everyone else here yet?”
Behind us, I heard a loud electric sting of organ music, and the sky flickered with lightning as thunder shook the street nearby. I turned as a voice boomed. “I’M BACK BITCHES!” in a sensational explosion of sound that was all too familiar to me.
“You’ve never been here before,” I responded mildly as Bethy melted from the shadows.
She pouted at me. “Well I can’t say ‘I have arrived, bitches’,” she complained. “That sounds stupid.” She whirled to glare at a corner. “And did I say you could stop hitting the thunder sheet. You’re totally ruining my entrance.”
A girl stepped from the dark, red eyes blazing with barely suppressed hatred. “This is STUPID!” the delicately featured blonde snapped. “You’re the worst!”
“Daddy said you have to listen to me,” Bethy said imperiously. “Otherwise I can beat you up a bunch. Or have Shane do it. A proper vampire is always mindful of their surroundings, and they know that a good entrance is the key to success. This is why I’m Daddy’s favorite and you and Will got sent here to be my gofers.”
“We are NOT your gofers,” the girl, who must be Tamsin, hissed in outrage. “We’re your bodyguards.”
Bethy snorted. “You guys aren’t even as tough as me. I could totally kick your ass even though you’re B-rank. You’re the worst vampire ever. And I’m gonna break through soon too. Once I’m B-rank you guys will have to be nice to my friends all the time, not just when I’m watching. Otherwise I’ll just eat you both.”
I wasn’t sure what being B-rank had to do with that, but I grimaced and tried to interject. This wasn’t the place for the current discussion. “Bethy, maybe you guys can settle this another time. Like any other time. Literally. We’re about to walk into the lions den here.”
“There’s gonna be LIONS?” she squealed excitedly.
“Turn of phrase, sweetie,” Callie chimed in fondly. “There won’t be actual lions. Probably. I don’t see why there would be, though I guess no one definitely shot it down so it IS possible…”
I groaned. “Do NOT fall into her rhythm. This is how we ended up with that cult. No Bethy, no lions. But there WILL be potential enemies. And I could use you on our side against them. Especially when the others show up. Do you know if Chelsea is coming?”
“She got an invite,” she confirmed. “And she should be on her way. Applesauce and Mel are coming too.”
I tried not to choke at this most recent outrageous name. He wasn’t even here this time…or so I thought, until I heard an outraged choking sound from behind me. I rolled my eyes, turning to find Abel stepping into the streetlights with Mel, Benny, and Jessie. “That’s not even a NAME,” he accused Bethy passionately.
I nodded to Benny. “So, they’re inviting anybody to this thing, huh?”
“Well sure,” he said lazily. “How else would you have ended up here. I assume they need someone unnecessarily tall to use as a hat rack. Speaking of your ridiculous head, are you aware you’re wearing two masks right now?”
“Of course,” I said imperiously. “This is the new fashion. I wouldn’t expect a philistine like you to recognize good taste.”
“Nope,” Bethy said, popping her lips. “Definitely not. You look super dumb, boss.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose, or at least the approximate area of it. “Thank you Bethy,” I said tiredly. “I’ll keep it in mind. Now, are we waiting for anyone else?”
“I think a few of us are already inside,” Benin volunteered. “We waited for you because I assured everyone you would definitely be late. Like you are to literally every important thing you have to do.”
Scowling, I raised a finger at him. “I was NOT late,” I snapped at him. “I’m exactly on time. YOU just have a weird thing about always being early because your mom brainwashed you.”
“It’s called manners,” he said acidly. “But I could see how you might think of that as brainwashing.” Despite the tone, I knew he was messing with me. Benny categorically disdained any of his mother’s etiquette lessons. His punctuality was the only trait he’d inherited from her, and even that was sporadic.
“You’re stalling,” Jessie cut in with an eyeroll. “And my girlfriend is inside, so I don’t really feel like sitting through it. So slap each other in the face to psych yourselves up or whatever nonsense ritual you need to do, but we’re going in.”
I frowned. “Well you don’t have to be mean about it. We can go in if you want. Everyone have their masks?”
Most were wearing them, but not all, and when I brought it up, they slid them on their faces, each mask fitting perfectly over their features as if made for them. I kind of wanted to take one of these back for Zeke to study, he’d probably be fascinated.
Once we were all prepared, I stepped up to the door, banging on it sharply as I waited for someone to answer. Sure enough, it only took a second before it opened a crack revealing a black and silver mask ringed eye. “Password?” The voice was gruff and obviously exaggerated, clearly trying to sound menacing.
The head jarred as something smacked into it, and the door guard yelped in outrage. “Shup up Frank,” snapped another, much more reasonable voice. “There’s no password, they’re wearing the masks, which means they were invited. Do you want to tell Clarissa her guests didn’t arrive because you wanted to feel like a badass?”
Opening the door, the short, red haired man grimaced. “Sorry Bobby,” he muttered. “I was just kidding around.”
Bobby, who was blonde and a fair bit taller than the broad shouldered Frank, shot us an apologetic smile. “Sorry, Frank doesn’t usually pull guard duty. Clarissa found out that he was stealing her breakfast rolls and he’s being punished.”
“I don’t know who that is,” I informed him cheerfully.
He balked. “Oh…right. Anonymous. With the masks,” he winced. “I probably shouldn’t have used our real names. Or Clarissa’s. Shit.”
“It’s fine,” I assured him. “I don’t even remember your names.”
“Oh, I’m Frank,” Frank said brightly. “And he’s Bobby.” Bobby turned to glare at him, and Frank grinned maliciously. In the end, they both just rolled their eyes and turned away from each other.
Clearing my throat, I offered a hand. “I’m Shane,” I said deliberately. “So now we’re even.”
We weren’t, because my identity would be obvious to anyone with a brain. But it was a nice gesture, and I could tell they appreciated it. “Right,” said Bobby. “Well, come on in then. Everyone is already inside. Just follow the hallway straight back. And don’t listen to anything calling your name. Someone decided to get wisps for the decorations and they got loose in the corridors. They’re not dangerous if you ignore the whispers.”
I held back a snort at the comment, because it was the most Ascendant thing I’d ever heard. “Noted,” I said with a grin.
Bethy bounced forward, to slip in between us. “Oh, do you guys let people perform? I’m a really good singer. I’m famous back home.” She put her hands on her hips, taking a strong pose as she shared her past as an idol.
He raised a brow. “I mean…I guess? There’s no rule against it. I don’t think.” He glanced at Frank who shook his head. “I’ll put the request through channels. I suppose. Someone will be in touch.”
Grinning at seeing a complete stranger put through something we had all experienced a thousand times, we stepped past him into the hallways. Bobby nodded us through, clearly distracted but still doing his job as welcoming committee to at least a nominal degree. Once we were through, the two of them stepped out of the door we’d come in through, slamming it behind them and leaving us alone in the halls with only one last look back.
Waving our goodbyes before they vanished from sight (and why they’d chosen to do that I had no idea other than just to be dramatic), we made our way deeper into the building. The hallways were carpeted with actual grass, painted so black they looked nonexistent, with tombstones built at intervals demarcating the walls so we didn’t bump into them.
Around the corners, balls of white ghostly mist floated, zipping out of sight as soon as we noticed them. Glancing at my wife, I took her hand as I stepped to the front of the group to lead. Then without another word, we headed into the dark. I guess someone wanted this party to be to die for.