This beautiful, radiant girl was being photographed by Alex Stoyanov in his studio, and I joined in — with my camera. I had never met her before, never spoken to her, so it felt strange to photograph someone I had zero connection with.
I decided to shoot entirely on film — no digital backup, just film, not knowing whether anything would turn out. I shot one roll of medium format (120mm) and some 35mm — mostly because I had to finish the damn roll and send it off to get developed.
I shot 35mm in auto mode, like I often did back then — but the light in the studio was tricky. Manual settings would’ve made more sense. Not my best judgment day.
And of course, I messed up the focus on the medium format frames — the very ones I was counting on most.
It took me six months to send her the images. I had to force myself to do it — because no matter what, she gave me her time, and it only felt fair to share the results with her.
Looking back now, I realize these photos aren’t so bad. They’re just… not me. Not my energy, not my usual environment. And the studio — I recognize it in so many other people’s shoots that it feels hard to make it my own.
But that’s okay. At least I did it.
I didn’t run, I didn’t give up, I didn’t bury it forever.