TW - Death, funeral, grief
Hello Humans,
Here is my song of the month.
As you know, “Enough” is about the passing of my grandmother, specifically the day of her funeral, and how in grief, the distant members of our family found each other again.
At the wake I was reconnected to my wonderfully unique (and somewhat weird) family. Garry was immersed for the first time into the group - from my vegan activist cousin to my rather conservative eccentric uncle, it was an absolute melting pot of contrasting people from all walks and ways of life. Say what you will about my family - we are not boring! 😂
(Here's a few of us last Christmas, looking painfully British 🤣)
I know my grandmother would have loved it, as we debated politics, shared food and stories, supporting each other through the sadness. I was so pleased to have spent time with them all that day and it made me realise what a beautifully diverse tribe of humans I am part of.
Only death can bring us together in this way and although it was a sad occasion I left feeling inspired, knowing even more about my grandma than I ever had previously.
I wanted the song to capture the contradictions of that moment - sorrow and love, grief and gratitude, the weight of absence and the comfort of shared memory.
Recorded on my grandma's 130 year old Blüthner piano, this piece of music will now help me travel back to her in my mind. It's now part of my internal "musical map".
The cover photo is my Grandad (an Irish soldier who I never met as he died before I was born), my Grandma and my father, John as a child.
That is all I have to say about the song, the photos and the story behind it all. I hope you enjoy this moment of stillness in your day and as always, thank you for letting me share this.
Love,
Mishkin
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Enough
Trembling handsWe’re treading sandTill someone calls from the home
The weakest laughThe hardest partI know she’s finally flown
Salt from the woundFills up this roomAnd a pain that will bind us with love
How I would traceEvery line on your faceAnd I hope you knew me enough
As her crowdComes pouring outAs we bowed to the weight of the room
I can’t bearThe smile that I wearAs the thief comes to take what is due
What will I save?As your memory fadesGrieve we mustBut I know, I trustThat you knew me enough
What remains, runs through my veinsAnd words that were only for usThread through my days, everything that you gaveAnd I know that you knew me… enough