My Essence...
[Guided] (Origin)[Exertion] (Tier 1)[Cycle] (Tier 1)[Insight] (Tier 1)[Perception] (Tier 1)[Tempering] (Tier 1)[Darkness] (Tier 1)[Will] (Tier 1)
Beyond it...
How it expressed itself through my wings...
How it now bent reality to allow me to fly...
How it colored my wings with the same iridescence as my eyes...
How it mutated...
"Alright, that's enough."
Magister Eliott's commanding voice broke through my meditation state, announcing the end of the Essence [Appraisal].
Still, I lingered for some more time in my Essence communion state, slowly feeling out the subtle changes my Essence went through following its early maturation.
Where previously it felt much like intangible air inside which all my Aspects chaotically drifted, faint threads were now as if spread throughout, acting as some makeshift structure.
A structure that I supposed was what my wings had been missing to be capable of doing more than what their physical properties dictated they could do.
I would definitely have to come back to it when I had time.
When I ended my Essence communion and opened my eyes, it was to the sight of Magister Eliott taking notes at such prodigious speed that I had no qualm admitting I couldn't follow his writing hand at all.
"You caused me some bad fright when someone had to barge into my office to urgently report that you were dying from an unknown Essence corruption."
Yet, despite taking notes at such speed, he was still able to chat with me so nonchalantly.
He was a Magister, alright.
"If I hadn't been shortly informed that it was a serious case of Essence disorder instead, the entire Prime Temple would have entered a state of alarm. Well, at least you made up for it by allowing us to observe an Essence mutation phenomenon as it happened. Nice apology if I do say so myself."
"I mean, use my suffering as an apology all you want," I quipped back, "I wish to know what my Essence mutation did, or is, though. Am I going to explode? No way, right?"
He briefly glanced at me and apparently found me wanting.
"Let us debrief this whole event with everyone else. Never underestimate the importance of being offered differing perspectives and opinions on matters that relate to a field as mystic as Essence entities."
I accepted the advice with all the considerations with which it was given, then continued to wait until the Magister had finished writing whatever he was writing and stood up, indicating to me to follow.
I naturally took off flying, the ease at which I could do so genuinely far surpassing my wildest expectations of what flying would feel like, and one door threshold, a long corridor, and a familiar itinerary later, we arrived at the Seeker sanctuary.
Our arrival was evidently noticed, and an old Toro came to lead us towards one of those huge rooms called "amphitheater", where an assembly of members of the Faith was already settled and ready to hear the results of my Essence [Appraisal].
That, or they were simply interested in this sudden event and decided to take part for the heck of it.
The latter would be why I would be here, personally.
"Go take a seat wherever you like, Solaena, you'll find such seminars to be one of your best sources of entertainment, socialization, and novel knowledge in the future, so better enjoy your first time rather than feel anxious for nothing. Your participation as an orator will, of course, not be warranted."
It took me some time to parse the meanings of the Magister's words, but I had apparently been given leave, and with my eyes darting everywhere, it didn't take me long to find and decide where I wanted to have this new experience.
"Move on, please. Look at all the gazes you're attracting."
"I guess you can fly now, huh?"
"At least you'll not need anyone to be your steed anymore."
"A shame, I liked having her negative negative luck blessing..."
"You look much better now. I was genuinely scared you would die after seeing you in the infirmary two days ago."
Surrounded by friends, all my worries melted away, and after being generously gifted a small giant-sized pen and some clean pieces of paper, I was ready to learn everything I could from my first-ever seminar.
As I should. Considering this seminar was brought about by my accident.
"Order!"
Approximately ten minutes after we arrived, during which the amphitheater only grew louder and louder, Magister Eliott finished his discussion with the few Seekers who welcomed him, and one of them was the one to shout for order.
Then it was Magister Eliott who stepped forward, as indifferent as ever, even to the crushing sense of suspense that abruptly spread through the room.
"Four days ago, Acolyte Solaena was found on the edge of consciousness in her bed after she was reported to have missed attending the Sentinel Initiate trainee training, which she had since the day of her honorary joining, more than a month ago, not been absent from once."
While spreading his notes on the massive desk in the center, he summarized in one sentence how everything started from the perspective of the Faith.
How riveting.
"Her state, upon being admitted to the infirmary after being brought to it by Warrior Leo, looked awfully similar to an early onset of Essence corruption as could be attributed to Morvane, internal decay, Cindraal, slow combustion, or Velcryx, corrosive seep."
Bad news.
I was already getting lost at the second sentence.
And I apparently wasn't the only one, as I heard intense scratching from everyone around me, writing down what they just heard for later investigation.
"However, and fortunately for everyone here, her affliction was swiftly identified to be an extremely intense Essence disorder, which found its origin in a complex interaction between a state of premature Essence overdevelopment and a state of Essence entity early maturation caused by this same premature state of Essence overdevelopment."
"Nevertheless, the inordinate intensity of the Essence disorder as should be born by such an interaction caught the attention of Lorekeeper Avenorium here."
He indicated a massive bald Orun, his smooth green skin-covered frame visibly bulging with muscles in defiance of the ampleness of his Seeker robe.
"And his continued observation of Acolyte Solaena bore results faster than even he dared to believe, as within a day of being brought to the infirmary, following the tell-tale sign of one of her Aspects advancing, Lorekeeper Avenorium personally beheld her entry into a confirmed state of Essence overdevelopment."
"Lorekeeper Avenorium will now deliver his perspective of how things unfolded for Acolyte Solaena's Essence."
After uttering these words, Magister Eliott leisurely left the stage, allowing Lorekeeper Avenorium to assume the orator position in turn.
"Acolyte Solaena's entry into a confirmed state of Essence overdevelopment wasn't evident during my first [Assessment] of her Essence. The first anomaly that truly retained my attention was the sudden elevation of the apparent density of her Essence, which I recognized externally by simply comparing my previous observations..."
Upon Lorekeeper Avenorium venturing into the mystic field of Essence [Appraisal], nearly everyone gave up taking notes, me included.
"I give up."
"I'm still just an Acolyte to my latest knowledge."
"My sanity is more important, sorry Solaena."
This wasn't a field of study we would be interacting with anytime soon, and worse than that, it was an independent field of study with its own jargon, rendering the task of comprehending what was currently being said plainly impossible.
At least it made for a beautiful moment of camaraderie.
"...then came the final sign, the early manifestation of an external core, indicating that Acolyte Solaena's Essence had reached the upper boundary of the Essence overdevelopment threshold, officially pushing her into a fleeting state of Essence volatility."
"This state of Essence volatility, as is always the case without external influence factors, resolved itself by shifting her excess Essence towards a self-induced state of Essence mutation, alternatively aptly called a state of self-adaptation."
"That is when Acolyte Solaena's physical body started being eroded away while her Essence endeavored to develop a solution to..."
So I was right.
My bones being crushed, my muscles turning into mush, my breath ceasing, my heart stopping.
Those actually happened.
I only survived thanks to my freshly-advanced [Will], my [Cycle] being artificially enhanced by special solutions rich in nutrients, and the healers who attended to me throughout all hours of every day I spent battling for my life against my own Essence.
Damn.
Since when was Essence development so dangerous?
Were there any obvious signs that told me to slow down that I missed?
"...thankfully, Acolyte Solaena's Essence ultimately comprised an immature Essence externalization, her fairy wings. Without this element that could be compared to an 'inadequacy', I strongly suspect her Essence mutation would have been left wholly directionless, potentially leading down a most vexing end."
"I now have the honor of introducing to you Archivist Horace, who will detail the hypotheses that could explain Acolyte Solaena's Essence mutation..."
And on and on it went, knowledge assailing me and everyone else from all directions for the better part of two hours, giving us practical applications of tedious theories and pieces of a greater whole that may one day grow into a proper comprehension of reality.
"...to end this seminar, I will first make one final statement concerning the nature of Acolyte Solaena's Essence mutation, which I'm sure you are all curious about."
Eventually, after filling my mind with enough to cogitate on for months if I were interested in everything, the seminar neared its end, and Magister Eliott took back the position of orator for one last surprise.
"And I'm sorry to disappoint, but to all intents and purposes, as you were told, her immature wings served as nothing more than a glorified emergency pressure release valve. As such, Acolyte Solaena's Essence mutation on the Essence externalization that is her pair of fairy wings truly is just that."
"Her wings are now better unified with her Essence, making them ostensibly more responsive, with a slightly higher development potential, and their regeneration in case of loss easier. As for their iridescence, it is but an aftermath without any tangible repercussion beyond making her more visible."
"I'll take that..." I mumbled to myself, all too happy that such a potentially catastrophic turn of events turned so comparatively benign.
"And now, I will conveniently make use of this impromptu seminar to make an announcement that has absolutely nothing to do with Acolyte Solaena's curious case," the Magister casually followed up.
"Fourteen months from now, Red Sand will be sending an expedition into the Red Sand Realm with the destination being set to an unexplored ecological pocket."
The announcement resounded through the amphitheater like a piece of the ceiling collapsing and crashing into the endless sands of the Red Desert, causing everyone to be silenced.
"In exchange for twenty percent of the resources harvested during this expedition, the Faith Of The Aspects has promised to lend some manner of assistance to this expedition."
"Due to the fortuitous timing, participation in this expedition will count as merit for the upcoming personnel transfer to the Silver Tempest Sector. Anyone who wishes to be part of it can..."
I listened to the announcement like everyone else, but really, most of it went way over my head.
Expedition into the Red Sand Realm?
Unexplored ecological pocket?
Merit?
Transfer to the Silver Tempest Sector?
I just joined the Faith.
I wasn't yet one year old.
I just suffered from a disastrous case of Essence overdevelopment, which I hadn't known was a thing.
I only just became able to fly like anyone expected any proper fairy to be able to.
I barely mastered the fundamentals of a single Seeker field of study.
I still progressed a bit every time I attended the Initiate trainee training.
I...
I still had so much to do, learn, and practice here, in this so-called "barren" Sector of the Nexus Realm.
And I already learned about the incredible difficulties and distances involved with travelling to another Sector.
It wasn't anything I couldn't deal with now that I could fly.
So really...
All I wanted to do was to return to my [Guided] [Exertion]s.
One I already knew would be heavily inclined towards Essence overdevelopment research.
It would also be my first flying [Exertion]s.
◇ ◈ ◈ ◆ ◆ ◆ ◈ ◈ ◇
It was such a wonder how a single detail changing in my habitual [Exertion] routine changed everything.
My wings simply stopped being burdens that couldn't even allow me to jump higher than a sanctuary bookshelf despite being strengthened by all the [Will] I could manifest, and the world as if transformed.
The giants stopped being formidable hurdles I couldn't stop being [Guided] to prepare to avoid.
No bookshelves could hide one of their books in an annoying corner or behind another book anymore.
The Initiate trainees plainly lost the ability to catch me even when I was at my worst.
I moved so much faster.
Everything became so much easier.
I became so addicted to the freedom and absurd empowerment brought by flying that whenever I was [Guided] to go through the [Exertion] of grounded motions without the assistance of my wings, they felt unimaginably slow and sluggish.
Flying truly was... a different world.
It plainly redefined the foundation on top of which I built my perspective of reality.
And it did so in no further impacting junctures than when I was [Guided] to push my newfound flying abilities to their utmost limits.
If I ever thought I could outrun death itself, it would be when my entire manifested [Will] came to bear on my wings and forced them to beat at such absurd speed that I learned during my first attempt to spread the warmth of my manifested [Will] to my back muscles, lest they ripped from the strain I put them under.
Then I learned why I also had to infuse the rest of my body, when I utterly failed to adjust my trajectory to avoid whatever obstacles my [Perception] warned me stood in my way due to an inadequate reaction speed.
Of course, those were only the most thrilling moments that were scattered far and away over days of [Exertion]s that never ceased to push all my other Aspects in a way that wholly disregarded the danger of reentering a state of Essence overdevelopment.
And that...
That was because, despite gaining the wonderful ability to fly, an ability that amended reality to now fit my existence, I was still being [Guided] to actually spend most of all my waking hours reading books on the ground.
Books, tomes, scriptures, compendiums, manuscripts, scrolls...
Anything with one word of content that construed the topics of Essence entities, immature Essence entities, Essence mutations, Essence adaptations, Essence overdevelopment, Essence externalization, immature Essence externalization...
I was [Guided] to read everything until my eyes teared up blood.
And the conclusion I forced [Guided] to utter through my own mouth?
It was weird.
Weird, as in, my own case didn't fit.
Or it was more accurate to say that my case didn't exist in the existing records of the Seeker sanctuary.
If any cases like mine or similar enough had ever transpired anywhere else, the books present here didn't mention it.
There was absolutely nothing about a practical Essence disorder case involving an Immature Essence Entity, a state of Essence overdevelopment, a single immature Essence externalization, and an Essence mutation-slash-adaptation.
I was "special" in the worst way possible.
Not that while I stood impotent against this state of being special, [Guided] was.
And as it concerned my life and future, it was relentlessly in its search for answers.
Necessarily, I fully accommodated that research, never hesitating once, even when I was [Guided] to search for Lorekeeper Avenorium to ask him questions I couldn't hope to comprehend just yet, with answers I had to prevent myself from asking their every word's meaning.
At least that had the secondary benefits of gradually endearing myself to the high-ranked Seekers...
Which helped me be, in turn, referred to more and more obscure records belonging to the domains of Essence mutation and Essence overdevelopment...
It was a virtuous [Cycle] of ignorance.
One that apparently led [Guided] to the contradictory answer that there was no need to slow my Essence development one bit.
I only had to go through a deep Essence communion to let [Guided] verify the state of my Essence every time I went to sleep and woke up.
It was nothing revolutionary, really, and in a mere couple of weeks, it became just another part of my [Exertion] routine.
Waking up
Reestablishing my [Cycle].
Getting some [Tempering] going.
Having a deep communion.
Followed almost directly by my first [Will] manifestation of the day, to empty my energy reserve out.
After that, I enjoyed an intense research and [Insight] time in the [Darkness] of the Seeker sanctuary, making the most of my [Perception] to not miss a single change occurring around me.
Somewhat recovered, I went to partake in the Initiate trainee training, being ordered by Warrior Leo to do the oddest tasks to "prepare" his Initiate trainees.
That was generally followed up by a most-enjoyable sparring period where I could let go of absolutely everything not related to defeating giants.
Then it was back to the Seeker sanctuary, where I waited for my energy to be restored to pseudo-full to go through an all-out [Will] manifestation, leaving me nearly blacked out on top of a bookshelf, my new favorite—if slightly dusty—place to do my studying.
Out of the reach of the flightless giants.
Thereafter, it was only a blur of [Exertion]s, of being [Guided] to do the most random things, of finding a thousand and one things to do until most others had long succumbed to their respective exhaustion.
Only then, mired by utter depletion of all that animated me, I was [Guided] to let on and enjoy the conclusion of an [Exertion]-filled day that lasted well-over the standard timespan of a day.
Sometimes I took to leisurely flying around the Prime Temple, its towering height cutting through the wind originating from the Red Sand Realm Rift, feeling the air humming softly against my wings.
Sometimes I brought a story to read on my bed, the quiet turning of pages blending with the distant murmurs of the Faith's never-ending affairs.
Sometimes I went to chat with others I felt some manner of connection with, growing more and more familiar with their habits, their voices, their figures, their stories, their likes and dislikes,
And once the time came for me to be welcomed by the warm [Darkness] of slumber, I communed with my Essence and allowed myself to drift ever-deeper into the truest expression of who I was...
Until I opened my eyes once more, rejuvenated and ready to stay true to the name I bestowed upon myself by tackling another day of endless [Exertion]s.