"Memory creation hypothesis, past scrying conjecture, first attempt, commencing," I announced, not in hope of actually succeeding, but for the sake of eliminating such an absurd method from my future research planning.
"Don't do your best, this time." In answer, Lorekeeper Avenorium wished me best in his customary nonchalant way. "Only a precious few experiments accidentally solve the wrong problems, after all, and for it to happen two times is too much to ask of existence."
Treating his words as the waste of air they were, I dismissed them to start [Focus]ing my entire [Awareness] on the one thing that mattered for this inane method.
Envisioning my own timeline.
My conception.
My birth.
In between these two.
Before I formed [Guided].
Right before I heard the first whisper.
Employing all the remnant memories and sensations from my previous attempts, I mentally recreated the best model of my timeline, and only when I felt like I couldn't further solidify its foundation...
Did I [Will] memories into being to fill all the gaps I voluntarily created where I hypothesized the proto-[Exertion] that ultimately led to [Guided] becoming my Origin Aspect.
My energy plummeted as fast as my Tier 3 [Will] Aspect could accommodate it.
Very, very fast.
It was so fast that less than sixteen seconds after I [Will]ed those memories into being, I preemptively triggered my [Ambition] Aspect, which enabled a relatively smooth transition from sustaining my [Will] with my free-flowing energy to sustaining it with my sole [Ambition] to find an answer.
Another sixteen seconds later, I got to fully reacquaint myself with the mathematical notion that was exponential growth.
The fact that my energy was drained within seconds upon [Will]ing for the impossible was hardly surprising, for I had evidently attempted to [Will] the impossible often enough for that outcome to be familiar.
What was new, however, was discovering how this translated once my [Ambition] became the sole force sustaining such a senseless [Will].
It was impossibility given form.
Not a temptation to persevere.
Not a challenge to overcome.
A simple, undeniable declaration that continuing was not an option.
The burden felt tangible in the way an entire Strata had been placed upon my shoulders and was evermore on the verge of collapse with each passing instant.
After withstanding less than a minute of this burden, neither I nor [Guided] attempted to resist any longer.
I stopped.
Immediately.
Unfortunately, I stopped too late for there to be no aftermath.
By the time I stopped feeling like I was fighting against a looming Strata's worth of collapsing metal, the world felt distant and insubstantial in a way I never felt before.
It was so intense that my body answered my intentions with a noticeable delay, and my thoughts slowed to the point of near nonexistence...
It was as though some fundamental part of me had yet to realize the weight of my [Ambition] had been lifted, or the shock had been such that I had unwittingly discovered a new way of [Cultivation].
Eventually, though, the aftermath passed, and I finally concluded my latest desperate attempt at acquiring a clue as to how to make [Guided] Essence [Cultivation] a reality.
"Memory creation hypothesis, past scrying conjecture, first attempt, entire energy reserve invested, [Ambition] threshold crossed, effects are similar to [Will]ing the impossible into being," I said, fully aware of what my words implied.
I failed.
One month of experimenting with the most logical [Insight]s, now followed by another month of testing out [Insight]s that increasingly pushed credibility, and still no result to speak of.
Two months in total, and utterly no development in [Guided] Essence [Cultivation] to show for it.
Not even one ambiguous lead.
Or rather...
"Is forming the [Mystery] Aspect for the sake of a single [Insight] that may not even be realizable worth it?" I spoke up, addressing the very Aspect that Lorekeeper Avenorium [Guided] me towards.
An Aspect that had an infinitesimal chance of leading me towards an answer if I were to make it part of my Path.
Though whether that answer would be connected to my [Guided] Essence [Cultivation] or not, that, I wouldn't know until I got it.
"When it comes to a Path-changing decision like the one you're facing, I fear logical thinking loses much of its usual efficacy."
Instead of answering, Lorekeeper Avenorium stated aloud what I was already contemplating in my busy mind.
In the end...
How important was the possibility of [Guided] Essence [Cultivation] to my Path?
The [Truth], as was typical when it affected such matters, was blurry to the extent of [Harmony] failing to grasp and settle it into a convenient [Insight] for me to wholeheartedly [Focus] on how I desired to proceed.
What would happen if I made [Guided] Essence [Cultivation] work?
Would it do exactly what my initial [Insight] imagined?
Was I bound to encounter similar dilemmas later in my Path, thus warranting the preemptive formation of the [Mystery] Aspect anyhow?
Endless questions.
A handful of answers.
But oddly...
Wasn't such a condition of perpetually seeking answers I didn't have a core Aspect of my Path?
During the last two months, I sought answers for making [Guided] Essence [Cultivation] work.
Before that, I searched for answers to transform my idleness into long-term Essence development.
And earlier than that, I was scouring the sanctuary for scraps of [Knowledge] that simply weren't there.
Hence, the interrogation, really, ceased to be whether I should form the [Mystery] Aspect or not...
It was whether the [Mystery] Aspect truly was the ideal companion for a Path that destined me to pursue ever more elusive forms of [Knowledge] that I couldn't imagine yet.
"Alright, I suppose this is where we part ways for today. Don't hesitate to ask for my assistance again if you ever feel the need for it. My Path leaves me with little besides time, after all. Until next time, little Solaena."
"Sure. Thank you for your cooperation, Lorekeeper Avenorium."
Having provided the acknowledgement that both Lorekeeper Avenorium and his cooperation warranted, I watched him depart before returning my attention to the matter at hand.
And beyond the issue that the [Mystery] Aspect presented, it was a matter pertaining to the foundation of my Path, really.
As an Origin Essence Entity, I had always been taught that my Path ought to be dictated by my Origin Aspect.
Align with it.
Reject it.
Those were supposedly the only two options available to me if I hoped for my Path to take me to heights that matched my [Ambition].
As it turned out, after observing the pervasive laziness that afflicted every Essence Entity besides myself, I was forced to discard that framework.
I was different.
[Guided] was different.
My Path was different.
Lacking the necessary [Knowledge], [Comprehension], and [Clarity] to devise an entirely new Path framework, however, I had little choice but to borrow from existing ones.
And among the frameworks available in the sanctuary, none were as extensively developed as those of Pristine Essence Entities.
Pristine Essence Entities' Paths approached development from a fundamentally different perspective.
Each addition was treated as a decision rather than accepted as an inevitability, like what I was told Origin Essence Entities' Paths were about.
Advantages were weighed against disadvantages.
Immediate benefits were weighed against future opportunities.
Compatibility was weighed against alternative possibilities.
That approach, evidently, struck me as fundamentally superior.
A Path was nothing more than an accumulation of choices.
Therefore, every addition to it ought to withstand scrutiny against both existing and hypothetical alternatives.
The earlier such scrutiny began, the greater the cumulative benefit it could provide as one made their way to lofty peaks of power, influence, and authority.
Whether such analysis was premature based on my current number of Aspects—which for Pristine Paths was a factor they weighed inordinately heavily—was irrelevant.
A choice did not become [Worthy] of consideration only after it had already begun shaping one's Path.
For the consequences of a choice did not care how early along one's Path it had been made.
Thus...
As I had with the [Harmony] and [Purity] Aspects after discovering the inevitability of Essence corruption...
As I had with the [Inspiration] Aspect line after uncovering the immense potential—and equally immense risks—of [Faith]...
I would not rush this decision.
I would exhaust every avenue of research available to me.
I would allow months to pass while passively coming up with [Insight]s during my idle times, striving with all my mind to deny this expansion of my Path.
And only then would I entertain the idea of committing to an Aspect like [Mystery].
◇ ◈ ◈ ◆ ◆ ◆ ◈ ◈ ◇
"...can you believe that they found it? And so quickly at that?"
"...some of the ancient machinery even supposedly still works. Working lights and terminals and whatnot."
"...not scraps either, it was pristine metal."
"...they've already doubled the recruitment quotas. Every laborer, scavenger, and porter willing to travel is being signed up."
"...are they planning to build a permanent outpost?"
"...by the looks of how many construction crews are already being assembled, I would bet my right hand that..."
"...the first shipments are supposed to leave within days, by then we'll get a clear idea of what they intend to do by looking at how large the convoy is."
"...I've also heard of a map referring to hundreds of other stations, including bigger ones. Think that's a thing?"
"...I'm telling you, this is only the beginning."
"...this is clearly a once-in-a-generation discovery. Have they even explored all of it yet? Who knows how much they have yet to uncover?"
Even a full week after the Order's expedition returned from four months and several days spent within the Red Sand Realm, the repercussions of its success showed no signs of subsiding.
Quite the opposite, in fact.
The expedition had not only located the lost atmospheric research station, but it also successfully gained access to it, opening an entirely new confluence of interests throughout the Red Sand Sector.
And that mattered not because the expedition's success had been considered impossible.
It mattered because too many individuals and factions had planned around its failure.
As a result, few had adequately considered what such a success would actually entail.
The resulting lack of foresight became increasingly apparent whenever stories of expedition members returning home only to discover their families murdered, their properties seized, or their affairs irrevocably altered during their absence reached my ears.
Things were becoming messy.
And they were becoming messy remarkably quickly.
Not that I had so much time to dedicate to listening to idle chatter when I was so taken by my own research.
If I were to meet my past self from two months ago, before I initiated my research into the [Mystery] Aspect as a candidate Aspect formation to my Path, I would genuinely only have one piece of advice to give her.
Plan obscenely far ahead.
If I had done that, I wouldn't have wasted three weeks' worth of ambiguous investigation into something as relatively pointless as figuring out my potential [Mystery]-like Aspect candidate's role in the grand scheme that was my Path.
If I were allowed a second piece of advice, though, I would struggle to pick what to [Focus] her [Awareness] on.
How my upcoming Aspect syntheses for the [Clarity] and [Comprehension] Aspects could potentially supersede what the [Mystery] Aspect line promised to provide my Path?
What functions high order Aspects such as [Truth] or [Knowledge], that my Path was already set to likely allow me to synthesize, could one day fulfill?
Or maybe, I could directly open her eyes to the conceptual overlap between the [Secrecy] Aspect and the [Mystery] Aspect line?
Honestly, though, the first piece of advice should have been sufficient for me to infer that the [Mystery] Aspect line represented something fundamentally different from the preliminary research I had conducted into the [Purity], [Harmony], and [Faith]-handling Aspects.
Had I grasped that from the beginning, the rest would have naturally followed.
It was somewhat unfortunate that I only arrived at that [Insight] after what amounted to nearly a full month spent pursuing a line of thought now made mostly irrelevant, but it wasn't like making a mistake in my thinking had ever prompted me to back down.
I simply took it in stride and forged on.
Before long, I escaped the corridors brimming with idle talk and stepped back into the sanctuary.
There, I made my way back to the booknest I created on top of the [Paradox] Aspect single-shelf section and then proceeded to pick up where I left "Detailed Record Of Accidental [Fortune] - Path Version", which was exactly what its title read as.
A detailed record of all manners of Path-related fortuitous accidents [Worthy] of being shared, either due to their far-reaching impact once they came into what made them fortuitous, or thanks to the unique lessons one could learn from understanding the circumstances of those accidents.
Most found their origin in ignorance and coincidence.
A rare few, however, were exactly what I was paging through hundreds of similar books to seek.
Sensible decisions made for all the wrong reasons.
Individuals reaching for too much, too early, and their premature decisions narrowly coming back to save them when they were needed.
Taking advice from mentors and books, not contemplating the deeper implications behind them before applying them, and only years later discovering they were [Ideal].
Civilization was rife with success stories, but I couldn't care less about all those successes per se.
The circumstances, reasons, and mindsets that brought them, though?
I craved that.
[Guided] craved that.
Yet, for all my research efforts proceeded at a measured pace of [Guided]'s design, there was no denying the steady accumulation of [Insight]s they produced...
Nor the targeted Essence development that inevitably followed in their wake.
Thus, when five or six hours into today's research endeavor, my Essence pulsed with the tell-tale sign of a newly-arisen Aspect advancement disorder, causing my [Insight] Aspect to turn into something different...
I wrapped up my reading and started readying myself for my first Tier 3 [Will] Aspect-aided and [Ambition]-backed communion scheduled to last throughout the whole Tier 3 Aspect advancement disorder.
I may have failed to synthesize the [Comprehension] Aspect before my [Insight] Aspect advanced to Tier 3, but I would be damned if I allowed the resulting unwanted Essence development worth an entire month of [Cultivation] to be without benefit.
At the very least, if nothing else, this event would contribute to expanding [Guided]'s data collection regarding Aspect advancement disorder.
I didn't know what I would ultimately make of all this [Knowledge] that I wasn't even able to access without supremely twisted methods, but at least I would have it.
And it was always better to have than to not have.
◇ ◈ ◈ ◆ ◆ ◆ ◈ ◈ ◇
Aspect Advanced: [Insight] (Tier 2) ➞ [Insight] (Tier 3)
I persevered until the last sign of my [Insight]'s Tier 3 Aspect advancement disorder vanished, returning my Essence to its regular state of [Harmony] solely disturbed by never missing signs of the Essence overdevelopment disorder it was under.
Only then did I finally allow my [Ambition] to be quelled.
The aftermath, expected in the wake of such an intensive period of [Cultivation], manifested itself instantly.
My body lost all its strength.
My mind grew sluggish to the point of becoming unable to produce the slightest complex thought.
I didn't fight it.
I allowed myself to give in and collapse on the bed of the private ward I had now resided in for close to a week.
Then all I knew was [Darkness].
The instant I regained my [Awareness], I unconsciously began communing with my Essence to parse through the ongoing Tier 3 Aspect advancement disorder-
-only to realize shortly that the disorder was now behind me.
Repurposing this clumsy event, [Guided] requested me to carry out my morning communion, giving me all the justification I needed to pursue my communion.
[Guided] (Origin)[Cultivation] (Tier 1)[Insight] (Tier 3)[Awareness] (Tier 1)[Darkness] (Tier 1)[Will] (Tier 3)[Focus] (Tier 2)[Harmony] (Tier 0)[Ambition] (Tier 0)
And after a whole week spent doing nothing but that under a hyper-[Focus]ed state of hyper-[Awareness], getting to the lowest depths of my Essence couldn't have been more intuitive.
Like that, in less than five minutes, I completed my morning communion and was finally ready to resume my research on Path frameworks and the bottomlessly deep implications of making the [Mystery] Aspect line part of my Path.
Changing into a new bodysuit that felt perfectly tight and loose like I liked it, I rushed out of my ward, and swiftly after, out of the infirmary altogether-
"Solaena! Wait!"
Until I was forced to stop upon hearing someone call my name with the sort of tone that deserved to be listened to first before judging whether it was worth hearing further or remembering.
"Yes?" I turned to face the somewhat familiar face I believed belonged to one of the healer apprentices.
"A fairy from the Fairy House was here a couple of days ago, but as you were occupied, I was told a letter was left for you. You should check with the logistics."
"Alright, thanks."
That had been worth hearing about.
Acting on this new [Knowledge], I changed course and headed toward the nearest logistics office rather than the sanctuary.
Knowing the building inside and out, it took me little time to locate where the supposed "letter left to me by another fairy" had been stored, and even less time to reach it.
Confirming my identity proved equally straightforward.
Moments later, I found myself in possession of a properly-sized letter, which I promptly tore open on the spot to get to the content.
Circumstances surrounding the migration have changed. Please visit the Fairy House.
Brief.
Concise.
Entirely uninformative.
Changes could be favorable, unfavorable, or entirely neutral, after all.
Given the recent success of the Order's expedition, however, the range of plausible explanations narrowed considerably.
Not that speculating without evidence was a productive use of time when the Fairy House could provide actual answers and even invited me to inquire about them.
Oh well.
I guessed that was a perfect opportunity for me to ask uncomfortable questions regarding Origin Paths to Essence Entities belonging to my own kind.
And I also wasn't against stretching my wings after the week I just experienced...