FBI Agent Wade Barron POV
Colorful kites, hanging in the sky. The bluest blue all around as I clung to the string—running, playing, free of the world. My mother watched from off on a bench and waved to me; with a bit of reluctance, I ran toward her. Why did we have to go home, when we could have one more hour out by the pier? A faint memory danced through my head: a bike ride, just like we always did, cut short by a small red truck that sped off. The doctors barely saved her life from that hit-and-run, and I became obsessed with solving the puzzle. I liked putting pieces together, and to catch a perpetrator was to find justice where I couldn’t back then.
FBI. I’m an FBI agent—where am I? It’s dark down here.
The sunlight blinked back in, simple thoughts tugging me downward. It felt easy to stay here, and to watch the red kite dance in the sky. I…wished I could’ve protected Mom, and not seen her wheelchair-bound for the rest of her life. I pushed the memory out, even though a nagging part of me knew this was fake. It didn’t have to be; none of my worries or concerns had to exist anymore. I couldn’t feel my hands or my feet, but a bubbling happiness was nestled in my chest. My mother smiled at me, watching the kite spool bob in my hands.
“Wade,” she said gently, kneeling beside me and pushing a strand of hair back behind my ear. “You need to go back.”
I knitted my eyebrows together. “But why?”
“You’re not done helping yet, my son. Your friends are in danger, and the world’s future is…uncertain. You can’t rest.”
A nonhuman face flashed into my mind, but it didn’t startle me. It was…familiar. “Craun. I swore I’d protect him. I failed, didn’t I?”
“Not if you live to fight until tomorrow. But you already know that.”
“Yeah.” I nodded, feeling the kite slip out of my grasp. “I suppose I do.”
The world withered to a thick fog, senses collapsing in themselves, and the thoughts receded to the unclear recesses of dreams. It was peaceful down here, but Wade Barron wouldn’t go gently. The idyllic feeling was all that lingered when artificial light hit my eyes; this all had a dreamlike impression as well, and my memory was fuzzy. My entire being was in a relaxed, floaty state, and the intense happiness made me feel like nothing could go wrong or harm me.
I grinned at the blurry blob of yellow and red in front of me, thinking it might be the sun. I could fly up to it like a kite…
“Aw, cutie likes the painkillers!” a strange voice purred with overzealousness, breaking my blissful reverie with a jolt of alarm. Ugh, where am I? How did I get here?! “I hope you’re comfortable.”
My head snapped up with a sudden infusion of alertness, as the memories of the fight at the military base—or rather, humanity getting curbstomped, came rushing back to me. I was shot. It burned, my skin just…melted. The Council—CRAUN. Oh no, oh fuck!
I blinked several times to focus on the figure, and felt a breath-stopping dread creep into my throat. The source of the voice was a jarring, bizarre biped with a bright red face: not just the world’s worst sunburn. The alien had shaven, patterned fur along the edges of their face, as well as their body. There was a crown of cheetah-spot feathers on their cranium, like a headdress. The extraterrestrial peered at me with bubbly eyes, angling talon-like fingers that lacked a pointed tip at me.
I tried to back away in fright, as the creature’s appearance made my heart pound, but my wrists were tied. Recollection rushing back to me had me sobering up, past the highs of the painkillers. Being an FBI agent or…a human meant absolutely nothing here, in the Council’s domain. They’d captured me and didn’t believe that I was deserving of any rights; whatever their whims were, they could impose their will. They might not grow angry, but we’d thought wrong that they wouldn’t punish us! I was a meat slab on a table, powerless and trapped.
“P-please.” I struggled to find my voice, as the alien stared at me inquisitively with one ear angled toward the heart monitor. “I’m…afraid.”
The extraterrestrial’s eyes softened with sympathy. “Aw. You poor baby. Don’t worry, I don’t want to hurt you. My name’s Snelga—I’m probably the first Kexin you’ve met! I’m a vet, and that means I want to help you!”
My eyes went very wide, my nostrils twitching with disbelief. “…vet?!”
“Of course. I’m a wonderful vet!” Snelga, who I guessed was female, spoke with effervescent excitement. An animal doctor. It has to be a fucking animal doctor—I have to get out of here! “We didn’t expect anything different from primals. Obviously, your military closed in around your prize.”
“I’m…I’m not military!” I protested, the panic rising as the chains held against my thrashing. “Let me out of here. Please…help. Someone, anyone!”
The Kexin veterinarian looked horrified, as if she wanted me to calm down. I tracked her movements while sucking in shallow breaths, watching her jarringly bright face that didn’t match her body at all; she walked the length of my form, and I caught a glimpse of a white foam that’d been packed into a singed gash. An animal doctor was the only one who attempted to save my life—why had they taken me? My hollering for help intensified, though no response was coming.
Snelga shushed me, and reached toward one of my feet with unnerving fingers. I found my legs also bound, unable to be pulled out of her grasp. I squeezed my eyes shut and waited for a painful punishment, in an attempt to quiet the panicked animal; instead, I felt only a bizarre, scraping sensation. The Kexin was scratching my heels, in some sick hope of comforting me?! My feet jerked away with indignation, and anger fired up in my chest alongside humiliation.
“What the fuck?” I screamed, flattening my feet and scowling at Snelga. “Stop! Get the fuck away from me!”
The Kexin pushed her head feathers back, looking dismayed. “Oh. Oh dear. I didn’t mean to make you angry. Of course, you’re wild! You’re not used to people.”
I took deep breaths from overstimulation, a prickly shock coursing through my veins. “I’m not used to people treating me like an animal!”
“I specialize in primal medicine: my expertise is well-suited to your problems. It’s okay, baby, this is a lot to process. You can’t think now, anyway, so it’s not like you could understand anything in this moment. I’ll let your anger diffuse and come back later!”
Snelga saw herself out of the room before I could say anything else, leaving me to dwell on my circumstances. The wound had taken so much out of me, and exhaustion had drained me of the energy to try to solve the escape puzzle. I wanted to worry about what had happened to Craun and all of humanity, but I was the one abducted by aliens and being tinkered by a vet. A vet! At least I had painkillers, because the aftermath of my stomach getting sawn open by a laser sounded agonizing.
That was one kindness. I need Snelga’s help if that’s…my only option for medical care. What do the Council want with us? Why bring us here to patch us up, after how readily they opened fire on us—over the option of negotiating with primals?
Frustration burned in the final thoughts I had before slipping into unconsciousness. My mind lingered on how low the Council considered our own wishes and cognitive capacity to be; Snelga was treating me like some captured beast that’d run out into a car’s path. I knew they thought we lost all rationality and control when angry, but now, I was surrounded by people who thought I was a…beast. Persuading Craun, in our own backyard and without a pressing need to change his mind, was a whole different story.
“Awake time. Who wants a drink?” Snelga placed a nozzle to my lips, waking me up with the sensation and allowing me to suck down water. Her voice was sickly sweet, like a human might talk to a puppy. “We want you to be big and strong again. You like that, don’t you?”
I eyed the alien warily, keeping my fear concealed; it was obvious I had no choice about being here, and no option but to play along. “Snelga?”
“Yes? Wait, you learned my name! You’re doing good!”
“My name is…Wade,” I offered hesitantly, and her red face loosened with inviting encouragement. “Do you hate humans?”
Snelga’s expression dropped to mortified gawking. “What? No! Craun took advantage of you. I know you don’t understand, but you have an unequal grasp of the situation. Oh, what am I saying? These words are too big for scared beasts.”
“That’s not what I am. I…understand every word.”
The Kexin gave a patronizing headtilt. “You’re trying to. You took a Saphno into your pack. No one expected that! You’re as kind as beasts can be. It’s really sad, sweetie.”
What’s sad is that we gave Craun a home and a chance at help, and the Council rushed in to slaughter us, because contacting humans…focus. You need Snelga’s help, if she really feels bad. I met the alien’s eyes, pleading with her. “It’s sad? Then help me escape.”
“Wade. You can’t attack me with your chains on.” Sternness oozed from the vet’s admonishment, before she perked back up. “I appreciate your effort though! Very clever try, but I need you to be good. For your sake.”
“I…did nothing wrong. You attacked us,” I spat contemptuously.
“It was unfortunate that we had no other choice to stop the contamination. You having FTL would be bad for everyone; you’re wild.” Snelga fiddled with some machinery and a syringe, and noticed that I began eyeing her with unease. “I’ll speak slowly, so you can try to understand! I’m going to give you a ‘local analgesic’ before I start today’s tissue fusion. That means—”
“I know what it means.”
The vet paused, not looking convinced. “It means I have to give you a shot, so it doesn’t hurt when I patch your wound. I need you to be very good and hold still, if you want to get better. Trust me, you need this. The tissue fusion really hurts!”
“Alright!” I grimaced and squeezed my eyes shut, wrapping my hands around the edges of the table. The detailed information had gotten into my head, filling me with dread; I imagined I didn’t want to feel the full force of the procedure. “Just give me the fucking shot!”
Snelga finished prepping the syringe and placed a palm over my stomach, while I forced myself to lie still; I hardly breathed as I waited for it to be over. There was a sharp prick in the sensitive skin, reapplying the deadening drugs to the area. The Kexin removed the large needle and dabbed at the skin. I looked at the alien to see her gawking at me, pride and amazement in her eyes. I shied away beneath her excitement, feeling an incredible amount of discomfort.
“WOW!!! Good boy! Smart boy! You’re on your best behavior!” she gushed. “That was amazing, Wade. Would you like a treat?”
I offered a defeated groan, as her denigrating views of humans appeared unshakeable. “…can it at least be a fucking lollipop? And come with those cute bandaids from the pediatricians.”
The Kexin skittered over to a treat bag, and despite cringing at what it might taste like, I was too famished to save my dignity; I’d have eaten anything after the toll the battle had taken on my depleted body. She held the pellet with tongs over my mouth, as if waiting to drop it down my gullet. The veterinarian noticed my face coiling with a bit of disgust, and assured me that, “It’s very yummy, sweetie!” I wolfed down the morsel the moment it crossed my lips, though it was awkward to chew stretched out on a table. It tasted salty…like a bacon pretzel. Hunger growled within my innards, and I looked up at Snelga with hesitancy.
I need some real food, not just a damn “treat.” Maybe I could try asking her for a meal.
“I’m starving,” I ventured, blinking with uncertainty. “Could I…please have some food?”
“Of course, Wade! You want to get your strength back. Give me one moment and I’ll bring you a meal.” Snelga finished activating a glowing plate that had adhered itself to my wound site, tickling my skin faintly. To my relief, she didn’t dump animal slop in a trough; instead, she pulled out a spoon and a bowl of some…blue porridge. “Alright, open really wide!”
A shudder ran through my chest, as she held out a spoonful to me. “I can feed myself, if you hadn’t chained my hands.”
“Sorry, sweetie. It’ll still be yummy in your tummy! Here comes the spoon.”
I felt humiliated as the Kexin shoveled reasonable bites into my mouth, waiting until I drained it off the spoon. I tossed the porridge around my mouth, and tried to dwell on the sweet, creamy notes. Snelga waited eagerly for me to swallow before transporting the next spoonful; she looked delighted to be “helping” me. She might’ve saved my life, but that felt like poor consolation for being trapped and depersonalized at every turn. It confused me why they couldn’t have a grain of respect for humans—God, everyone agreed we were intelligent!
As I zoned out and brooded on my present circumstances, I didn’t fully get my mouth over the next bite; some of the porridge smeared over my upper lip, and I was unable to remove it as it was caked over the sweaty, stubbly skin, right beneath my nostrils. Snelga made no moves to help clean it off, not of her own volition. I had never felt lower and more defeated in my life, as I cursed and turned my eyes downward.
I have to ask her for the most basic shreds of my dignity. This is what my life has come to.
“Can you please wipe that off my face?” I begged, a broken crack seeping into my voice; the vet hesitated, like she thought that was a bad idea. “Please, don’t just leave it there. We…have hygiene.”
Snelga appeared to wrestle with herself, before assessing the sadness in my eyes. The Kexin grabbed a napkin with a quick motion, seeming fearful—expectantly so—as she placed herself in close proximity to me. She studied me with such wariness, like an animal that she was scared to touch. The alien swatted at the mess with a napkin, and jerked her hand back in a hurry. Her eyes flashed with surprise, while I did nothing but sit there in a reserved manner. My appetite was dwindling in a hurry.
“That wasn’t a ploy to bite me? I know humans don’t usually bite, but your other options aren’t available,” the Kexin murmured. “And you’re very angry with us.”
I met Snelga’s gaze, both disgusted by the implication and desperate to reason with her. “I told Craun, anger doesn’t work like that. It’s one of the mind’s contradictions that you balance within yourself. Our higher reasoning is still there!”
“Wade, sweetie, we see you fight and argue all the time; you can’t ‘balance’ something so…primal. It’s verifiably untrue—sorry, big word! Look, even if you don’t totally understand what we mean, the desire to kill must be difficult to deal with.”
Indignation widened my eyes. “I don’t want to kill you! I don’t want to kill anyone. I understand that you see rage as the sole distinction between sapients and animals. I know it’s not personal, even, though it sure feels like it now.”
“It can’t be ‘personal.’ You’re an animal, and it’s exciting to hear you talk. I mean, I always wanted to talk to a primal, and you’re remarkable, but you don’t need to defend your anger. Wanting it to be different wouldn’t change it or be fair to you. I understand—you can’t help it either. You’re still a cute little beastie!”
Those last words shattered what resolve I had to change her mind, since it was obvious she viewed me as a screeching owl. Even if I somehow could convince Snelga from my vulnerable, lowly position, she was one veterinarian. What hope did I have of affecting change within the Council, when they’d utterly ignored our diplomats’ curated attempts to talk on the world’s behalf? There was no point to speaking any further, when it meant engaging with the idea that I was an animal. I ate the rest of my food in sulky silence, and the Kexin gave me a concerned look.
“You stopped speaking, primal,” Snelga noted.
I gave her a bitter scoff. “And here I hardly thought you’d notice.”
“Of course I notice! I enjoy talking to you! It’s fun!”
“Talking to me. Not with me. If it can’t be personal, then it’s hardly a conversation. You just belittle and insult and…humiliate me.”
The Kexin seemed crestfallen, her headfeathers sagging. “That’s not my intention, precious. I want to help you! It’s captivating to hear you speak, and I love it so much!”
“I’m only a circus attraction to you, a howler monkey in a fucking cage that you can poke. Humans don’t matter to you—and I’m beneath you. You love hearing me talk so much, that you think my entire species doesn’t even deserve to be talked to? To have friends? That we’re mindless, chattering animals?! You’re happy to take in our words—in one ear, out the other without ever parsing the meaning! You’d rather kill us than negotiate or…consider that we might be anything more than roadkill!”
“You seem like good, loyal primals. You wanted to help, in your own growling way. I can’t change your classification, but I have to wonder if there’s really no use for humans. I don’t know that we can fix this disturbance of your environment; any primal with internet access will never be the same, because of Craun. Not contacting you seems unfair—you’re smart enough to be cute, wonderful penpals! We could chat from far away.”
I sucked in a sharp breath. “Yeah. We could have done that. We just wanted to send a message to the Saphnos…”
“I’m trying to take good care of you, sweetie. You should rest and get better. I’m…sorry if I upset you. I don’t know what I said…”
Snelga offered me a snuggly blanket, before dragging her feet and walking out of the minimalist spaceship lab. I had no idea what the Council was going to do with me, but my concern now had to be staying alive and figuring out how to fight another day. I hoped to the high heavens that they’d release me from the veterinarian’s custody, because I didn’t know what I was going to do if I had to stay here much longer.
A/N - 39! Wade wakes up in the custody of a Kexin veterinarian who has him tied up, doubts his intelligence, and treats him like a cute animal who can’t understand anything. Our narrator is quite frightened to be in Council custody, but he tries to reason with Snelga and to get her on his side; as Snelga refuses to treat him like a person, Barron shuts down.
What do you make of Snelga and how she’s handling Wade? How do you feel about both the Council trying to save the wounded humans and about them using veterinarians?
As always, thank you for reading and supporting!