Ch140 A Clash of Souls

Her body goes still, and a faint shiver runs through her. As I start to pull away, her vibrant eyes open and lock onto mine. She lifts herself onto her toes to kiss me back.

A sweet sensation floods my senses, drowning out the sharp pressure in my souls for a moment.

It doesn't last long. 

The dangerous instinct surges through me with far greater intensity than it’s ever been before.

It makes the brief moments in Black Iron Mountain, and on my spirit field courtyard feel like tiny pinpricks compared to the thousand knives of pressure I feel now.

All of a sudden my ears ring, and my whole body lights up with pins and needles.

Both of my souls start to stretch and spin toward Lan Xin’s chest. I can feel extremely thin strands of fiery yellow and orange soul energy swirling out of her, attempting to merge with the white wisps of mine.

Usually my two souls are inseparable, like a smooth white ball of mist spun together. 

Now, I can feel the distinct separation. My old soul is far more stable, easily avoiding the danger, and capable of cycling in a consistent pattern to steer clear of these fiery wisps. 

This weaker soul is gravitating toward Lan Xin’s thin soul strands and uncontrollably latching onto them one by one.

My head aches, and my vision starts to blur.

I feel her soft hands reach up to hold my face right as my Jade Purity Soul Scripture activates all on its own. 

When I received this cultivation technique from a mysterious lottery die, it was absorbed as an orb of knowledge, most of which related to much higher realms. Everything above the qi refining stages, I quickly forgot soon after.

Now, one of these forgotten techniques triggers in my subconscious, and a rigid tearing noise echoes in my mind. A flash of golden heavenly aura ripples through both of us.

For a fraction of a second, I get a deep glimpse into the inner emotions of Lan Xin, like I’m witnessing them through her own mind.

The first, and strongest emotion is relief and pride in herself at this very moment for not trying to put up a facade even when she was scared.

There is a lingering excitement from when I used talismans to fight her back, and the subconscious thrill of being overpowered in this hidden realm will not leave her psyche even after being offered a door to leave.

It has morphed into a strong feeling of trust, and security as I am the only thing she can rely on in this moment. Everything else in her life has become a confusing blur.

A large amount of her active thoughts are contemplating what I think of her, and how she can improve her standing.

Beneath this, she constantly wonders of the rare artifacts I wield, my strange mannerisms, confidence in her presence since the day we met, strange cultivation speed, and where I really come from. 

The strongest raw sensations are less concise thoughts. They are more so bursts of emotions when she’s admiring my body, the sharp look in my dark gaze, and even smelling my natural scent. 

In the same instance, I have no control over what gets shared from the fragile feelings of my own younger soul.

First it shows the far more innocent half of myself witnessing her curves, smooth skin, and natural sweet scent.

This compounds with a deep admiration for her strong will, even in this golden prison, to see what she wants and not back down until she has it. 

There are even lingering thoughts of her background, climbing the sect hierarchy in the outside world. She’s never had the time or opportunity to stop and relax. There has never been a clear path forward presented by anyone, only shallow promises and obvious traps. She had to adapt, put her guard up, and become even worse than everyone else to survive.

There is an emotion of feeling all alone and helpless that resonates deeply with Lan Xin. It is from long before I ever entered this sect, or even came to this world. It is a glimpse into the heart of a mortal farming slave’s deep compassion for others.

All of my transmitted thoughts are filled with a potent empathy for her entire situation. 

They are words I’ve never even hinted toward saying to her face.

The golden flash of light pushes both of our heads back with a strong force.

I fall backward up the jade stairs, and Lan Xin slides a few meters away deeper into the array.

All of the horrible soul tearing pain recedes the moment we separate, but I’m left tingling all over, and both my souls feel unstable.

My vision focuses to see all of the previous anger and sadness in Lan Xin’s gaze has completely vanished.

She breathes just as heavily as me, holding her head to stop the ringing. However, there is only a clouded gaze of awkward affection in her eyes. Her guard is completely down, like she’s daydreaming, reliving the glimpse into my soul over and over again.

The young soul strands are still heating up in my body, reliving the shared emotions from her too, and putting impulses in my head to give myself entirely to her without restraint. It completely ignores the dangers of being torn apart from my other soul, and all of the blaring harmful instinctual warnings. 

This makes all my hair stand on end.

I hold my head with both hands and grit my teeth.

These two separate souls are splitting and altering my mental state in an eerie way I’ve never felt before…

In moments of high pressure, when my souls have been strained, the two halves always worked together as one. That is because the goal was simple, to survive. Now, it appears they have differing opinions.

I close my eyes and focus, cycling my cultivation technique a few times over without any distraction. 

The stronger soul wisps steadily spin, colliding with the weaker strands one by one, until they’re all pushed into the center of the whole.

In about half a minute, my older soul takes control again, and the chaotic split emotions fade. 

Concise logic takes the reins of my active mind, and a thin smile returns to my face.

I stand up to toss Lan Xin a heavenly grade healing elixir from my storage.

Then, make my way down the steps onto the array.

“Your intentions are pure, so I’ll trust you with my secrets. As you can see, my situation is far more complicated than it seems.”

She catches the pill, but is far too dazed to speak. Her other hand holds her own pounding head as I walk past. 

“Heal up quickly. You’ve made your choice, and I’ve made mine. We have a lot of work to do.”