After being questioned for nearly an hour, primarily by the excitable Scholar, we’re finally set free.
That’s when the Headmistress reappears to escort Bella and me to the administrative building. At the same time, the Headmaster takes Seraphine and Nyx elsewhere.
He looks… not quite unhappy, but disgruntled.
I shrug it off, more than willing to wash my hands of the pair entirely after everything. Besides, I’m sure I’ll see them again sooner than I’d care to.
They’ll want to claim their rewards from the Keeper eventually. I’m sure of it.
Exiting the tunnels, I find the sun high in the sky, lighting up the Academy in all its magical splendor. Though we’d experienced much, only a day and a half had passed, at most.
Then I remember the most important bit of information I’d gathered from the entire delve.
I pull the little slip of paper I’d written Bluebell’s advice on out of my storage and all but shove it into the Headmistress’ hands.
She pauses to accept it, curious.
“Can you check this book out? I think it holds the solution to my problem,” I say, barely containing my excitement.
The moment the words leave my mouth, I realize Bella has been listening.
Warmth rushes up my neck.
Sure, she knows… but that doesn’t make it any less embarrassing.
Then I make the mistake of glancing her way.
Bella is very carefully looking anywhere but at me, a faint rosy tint warming her cheeks.
Oh, Gods… just kill me now.
The Headmistress, apparently not one to miss such blunderings, notices.
Her gaze flicks from the note in her hand, to Bella, then to me.
One elegant brow rises.
“…I see,” she murmurs.
I open my mouth, not sure whether I should explain myself, defend myself, or just burst into flames and call it a day.
But my thoughts are a jumbled mess, and no words come.
Bella, of course, remains perfectly silent.
“Very well,” the Headmistress says at last, rescuing me from the silence. “Though I was hoping you’d come to me before issues arose.”
I give her a perplexed look. “Issues?”
She frowns at me. “Yes, issues. Unless… did you not take the medicine at all?”
“What?” I startle. “Of course I did. Why wouldn’t I?”
She stops walking to fully face us, her brows furrowed.
“And you made advances on your roommate despite that?”
Bella chokes on absolutely nothing.
At a glance, I find her face just as ablaze as my own.
For one horrible second, I consider whether getting lost in the Tunnels forever might be for the best.
“W-what?! No! It’s not—” I blurt, only to be interrupted.
“I don’t see how that’s any of your business, Headmistress,” Bella says, her tone impressively level.
The Headmistress seems briefly caught off guard at that.
“You would normally be correct, but Emilia is a special case—”
“I am aware,” Bella cuts in. “Of who she is, and what she is enduring.”
She hesitates, glancing my way.
Her eyes flick away just as quickly, the tips of her ears darkening.
“She has already spoken to me about it,” she continues. “And if I had objections, I would have voiced them then.”
What?
Every racing thought in my mind suddenly dies as a hauntingly familiar scent tickles my nose. Spices, and something sweet at the edges.
Her.
For a moment, I can’t think. Can’t speak. Can’t even breathe.
“So do not mistake me. I will not take advantage of her while she is not of sound mind,” she adds, more quietly.
I just stare at her, frozen.
Then my foot shifts forward before I even realize I’ve moved.
The Headmistress simply stares at Bella, as if trying to measure the truth of her words. Her gaze flicks to me for an instant, then widens.
Suddenly, the Headmistress is there, hands on my cheeks as she forces me to meet her gaze.
“Take another dose immediately,” she says, her words more commanding than even when she’d dressed down the faculty earlier.
Something in me recoils at the loss, and I try to glance around her—only for her to gently shake my head.
“Emilia,” she says, her grip tightening. “Take another dose, or I will be forced to isolate you.”
Her words finally cut through the haze like a blade, and I realize what’s happening.
The medicine wore off.
But wasn’t it supposed to last a week?
Despite my confusion, I mentally fumble with my Starlight Bangle until a familiar small box is finally in hand. Inside are four vials: one empty, three filled with a pearlescent liquid that never quite sits still.
The Headmistress finally releases me, and I don’t hesitate. I snatch one out, pop the stopper off, and down it in one go.
The taste barely registers, something faintly sweet and metallic, then it starts.
A wave of cool spreads through me, starting at my throat and flooding outward, washing over my chest, my limbs, my head…
The sensation drowns the sharp pull that had stripped me of sense moments ago. It steadies my breath, then. My thoughts follow.
When the world settles back into place, it feels just a bit duller than before.
The edge is gone, but all that’s left behind this time is doubt.
The Headmistress is still there, watching closely. Eventually she seems satisfied, and in a blink she’s returned to her position before us.
Before I can acknowledge the strangely apologetic half-smile Bella gives me, the Headmistress starts walking again, slightly more in a rush than before.
“If there is anything to find, I will have it ready by tonight,” she says, her tone clipped with urgency. “If not, I will have more medicine for you to bring on your upcoming delve. Until then, remain in your dorm.”
She spares me a stern look until I nod.
The trip is unbearably quiet, despite the mess of questions battering my mind.
Like why the medicine suddenly stopped working out of seemingly nowhere.
Or what, exactly, Bella meant when she said… those things.
The thought alone makes my heart stutter with panic, and I quickly push it away.
Not the time or place, Emi.
Besides… how am I supposed to trust any of this? I can’t even tell if my emotions are real anymore. My instincts insist they are, and I’ve trusted them before.
But this isn’t the same.
I’m not trying to fend off faeries, or figure out what my Oathstone is doing.
So this is something else. Something I can’t trust.
Right?
I realize the Headmistress has taken us to the our personal dorm room instead of the administrative building only when we arrive. After getting settled in our living area, she begins tapping away at an enchanted tablet.
“I’ve scheduled your second delve for tomorrow. Will you need anything for it?” she asks, then continues before we can answer. “I know that entering the Tunnels back to back like this can be exhausting, but we must have you properly enrolled before Classes begin. I hope you understand.”
“I’m fine,” I say a little too quickly. “I’ve barely touched my supplies since we only had to camp once.”
“It’s the same for me, Headmistress. Preparations will not be an issue,” Bella adds.
“Very good,” she says. “Do you have anyone else you’d like to delve with? I admit, while I am confident you will both do just fine alone, it is always risky to enter with such a small party.”
She looks back at us, her gaze filled with genuine worry.
I risk sparing Bella a glance, finding she’d managed to erase any hints of her earlier fluster. She shrugs at me.
I start to shake my head, then pause.
“If Cari is out of her exam, and managed to reach Tier One…”
The Headmistress smirks at me. “I believe we can arrange it… if she’s managed to advance in Tier.”
She taps away at the metal tablet again for a moment, then nods.
“That’s that. Now, before I leave, may I have a private moment with you, Emilia?”
Bella spares me a reassuring nod before standing and heading to her room.
Suddenly, it’s just me and the Headmistress.
She doesn’t wait.
“Do you know what kind of fae you are?” she asks.
The question throws me off for a moment.
Then it really hits me.
There are faeries, pixies, dryads, nymphs, satyrs, and more.
Out of all the fae races I’ve ever heard of, I match exactly none of them.
“As I thought,” she sighs. “Unfortunately, neither do we.”
She leans back into the couch and crosses her legs.
“The only fae that is even remotely similar to you,” she continues, “is Bluebell.”
“Wait, you’ve seen her before?” I say, my ears instantly perking up.
“Yes, yes,” she says, waving me off. “We knew of her well before this little incident today. Who do you think helped my husband make the Fatebound Daises?”
For a moment, I’m at a loss for words.
“Now then, not knowing your race poses quite the trouble. All fae are different. More different than even beastkin are from humans,” she says, her tone turning instructional.
Then she pauses.
“Apologies, habit. What I’m trying to say is that I made a fairly generic medicine for you, and it was well known to work for most of the fae races that were able to reproduce,” she says slowly.
And instantly, I know where she’s leading me.
“But not all,” I mutter.
She nods.
“Hopefully this book you were told of will hold the answer we seek, but if it doesn’t…” she says, her voice shifting from educational to deathly serious. “If we cannot get this under control, you will delve solo, then be isolated until your estrus has ended.”
My mind races at the declaration.
The thought rankles more than I expect, but the fact that I can’t place why that is goes to show that she’s likely right to make such a decision.
Still, it leaves a foul taste.
None of this is my fault, but I’m the one who has to bear its consequences.
I didn’t ask for these instincts. Or this potent an estrus cycle. Nor did I expect to find someone so—
Nope. Not finishing that thought.
I can’t even know what my real thoughts are anymore, if this medicine isn’t actually working as intended.
So instead, I try to force myself to look at it from the Headmistress’s perspective, breaking it down as simply as I can.
A student arrives with unstable instincts, unpredictable magics, and an active condition that severely compromises her judgment around others.
It’s my job to protect both her and those around her.
Thankfully, the solutions are actually blessedly simple: medicine, or a couple weeks of isolation.
Only the medicine isn’t working.
My jaw tightens as my frustration mounts even higher.
“I understand.”
“Good,” she says. “Now, I have some research to do. I’ll be back this evening.”
She leaves without another word, the door clicking shut behind her.
I curl into the couch, burying my face into the backrest and letting my tail flop off the front edge lifelessly.
Minutes pass like that, my thoughts circling the same questions.
Will the book Bluebell mentioned actually help?
Are these feelings mine?
Or are they just louder versions of something that isn’t real at all?
If the estrus ends… do they disappear with it?
Did Bella mean—
The door slams open.
Cari bursts inside, practically glowing with excitement, and before I can even react she’s there, arms around me, crushing me into the cushions with a squeal.
She wiggles against me with a giddiness I can’t even begin to fathom, words tumbling over each other into nonsense.
And just like that, I lose the battle to stay stressed. A small smile slips into place far too easily, given everything that’s happened.
Because I know this is real.
This warmth. This chaos. This overwhelming affection for someone so familiar.
There’s no doubt here. No second-guessing.
And this feeling?
This one is mine.
*******************
Authors Note:Well... there it is. One-hundred chapters. I'm not sure if I should be shocked or excited. I'm kind of both. And a bit nervous about how many chapters are left to go before the series is complete. But also happy?
My head is a mess. It's probably why this chapter is a bit heavier. I actually thought of ending it on a more humorous note like"Then I remember Bella has been in her room for… I don’t even know how long.
…Right.
I’m an idiot."
Or something. But... eh, I don't want to dilute the emotions and conflict in Emilia.
I'd love to hear your opinions on that, though. Do you think it'd end better with the humor, or where it is?
Anyways, I'm sure you all can guess why Cari's all giddy. Next chapter is going to be fun, I think!
///
On another note, I'm now working through Update Log 4 and Chapter 67 - Ten Steps Too Soon. That'll be done in the next... week? or two? or three?
Somewhere around then. Look forward to it! I'm quite happy with a lot of the edits, and I think you all will be too.