Act 10: Parian Plaza Shopping Center
MC and Taylor under absolute anti-Cauldron Terminus Project protection: talking about Wildbow’s unnecessary Youth Guard curse on PRT efficiency and possible Browbeat-related reality warps.
SUDDEN bisexual voice of Emma: ”Just look who is there! Our lovely friend Taylor with her boyfriend!”
Emma to MC: ”Do you know that she is a virginal whore who is a whoring virgin?”
MC: ”This doesn't make se—”
Madison Clements: ”Like Jessica Rabbit or Rachel from Tower of God! She is mentally a whore, but because she is so bad at it, physically she remains a virgin. BUT only physically, because from the most philosophical perspectives, such form of virginity IS whoredom. Even despite the theoretical presence of physical virginal characteristics, which, until proven otherwise, should also be considered with great skepticism.”
Everyone looks at Madison.
Emma: ”Um... Yes! That!”
Taylor looks at Emma with a bisexual glance and SEETHES!!!
Sophia menacingly glares at MC: ’Is he the Prey or the Predator?’
Sophia: ”Are you Prey or Predator?”
MC: “Prey or Predator? You don't mean... no-no, of course an Afro-American wouldn’t refer to the main Nazi standpoint...”
Sophia: ”I’m not a Nazi!”
MC: “Of course you’re not manipulated by the government pro-authoritarian propaganda and censorship person. I’m just saying that if you search your question on the Internet, you will find a lot of similar things related to Nazism.
Anyway, you probably figuratively ask about ”my capabilities.”
In this case...
Well, ”strength” comes in many forms: personal physical prowess, personal skills and experience, charisma and social connections, resources, and intellectual abilities.
Right now, the most powerful "predators" are rich people, officials, generals, businessmen, celebrities, and so on. Right down to the owners of the weakest aspects of strength — which greatly devalued by the existence of laws and firearms — and owners of just rapidly fading women’s beauty.
In the future, after the inevitable social collapse, this hierarchy will be reshuffled, but not very much.
At the very bottom also will be the aggressive asocial lone brutes. Too unreliable and impulsive to find and secure a stable source of food, nutrition, and medicine.
Slightly higher up will be the socially useful "former fashion model” cocksuckers.
Then socially adaptable people-pleasers.
And at the top, people with useful skills and knowledge.
Like Stephen Hawking.
Right now, Stephen Hawking's money, celebrity, and connections make him orders of magnitude more powerful than, let's say, Shadow Stalker. But after social collapse? Oh, boy, his vast knowledge and analytical capabilities will make him an even bigger asset for group survival. In an environment where any mistake could potentially be fatal such people are just irreplaceable.
Many orders of magnitude better Predators than just a little more efficient hunters. Because hunting is the simplest human and mammals activity possible.
Anyway, do you want me to evaluate myself in relation to the present or the apparent future?”
Emma: whines.
Sophia: ”Why. Did. You. Name. Shadow Stalker?”
MC: "Oh, it's very simple. There are communities on the darknet which try to reconstruct the approximate trigger conditions, and the mental traumas created by them, based on capes' superpowers and behavior.
Since Shadow Stalker's superpower is entirely related to escaping and hiding from superior threats, and her behavior is clearly sociopathic, she is often cited as one of the most obvious examples of an overcompensating victim of domestic violence or rape.
Constantly run away and hiding from stronger capes everlasting victim of everlasting strength-related trauma.
Also, as one of the most uncooperative — and therefore lacking the main advantage of homo sapiens — capes of Brockton Bay.”
Sophia: wobble.
Emma: wobble.
Madison Clements: ”It’s fit! I always knew there was something wrong with this ”just look how much moody Goth am I!” bitch.
MC: ”Yea. There are quite a few rumors about her on the darknet. Analysis of her movement patterns, which avoid power lines. Rumors about the sale of videos in which she's patrolling at night in a Wards suit, even killing some bums. There are even rumors that Empire knows her public identity and that she has a sister and a brother.
Emma: “But-but, if so, why hasn’t this information been used so far?”
MC: "Under the ”care” of the completely indifferent to Wards Armsmaster, she's slowly ripening from a ”potential regional news story for a couple of days” into a ”global news story for weeks.”
A hyperaggressive and sociopathic Ward-killer? Oh boy. As for me, if Miss Bum-Hunter doesn't transfer to another city soon we will have the opportunity to see in the Brockton not only Alexandria, but the entire fucking Triumvirate. And new Canary-like trial, of course.”
⸻⸻x⸻⸻
Intercom: phssss — phssss.
Intercom: ”um—”
Intercom: ”The cake is a lie, Bitches!”
Intercom: ”Yea — heh heh — Mario! — heh‑heh‑heh —”
Intercom: ”Wow, dude! — uh‑huh — GTA — yeah, WASTED!”
Intercom: ”Heh-heh-heh — Half-Life is COD — psss —”
Intercom: ”uh‑huh‑huh — dude! — uh‑huh — Radical! — uh‑huh — cool, dude!”
Intercom: ”kheee-khe — planescape — kheee-khe — BOOK! — yeah!”
Intercom: ”Radical! — uh‑huh — Diablo — uh‑huh — bad roguelike — uh‑huh — kill everything — uh‑huh.”
Intercom: ”Dude! — heee-khe — Dude...”
Intercom: ”Uh‑huh — much? — uh‑huh.”
Intercom: ”Heee-khe — Dumbass! — heee-khe — Two, dude! Always Two! — heee-khe.”
Intercom: ”uh‑huh‑huh, oh yeah — dude — Diablo Two — uh‑huh, yeah‑yeah.”
Intercom: ”heee-khe — Ocarina of Time — uh‑huh — Baldur's Gate year, dude! — uh‑huh — Fallout 2 year!”
Intercom: ”Woah! YEAH! He-he-he!! Duude! Best hehehe game!! — Radical, Radical! — heee-khe — but — dude — open world — dude — open world”
Intercom: ”uh‑huh‑huh — four years— System Shock?”
Intercom: ”kHeHe — dude! — Pfff! — The Mandate of Heaven — kHeHe — nine eight — PFFF! — Daggerfall nine and six! — BHA-ha-ha-ha — Wastel—”
Intercom: ”OUCH — dude — ouch!”
Intercom: ”kHeHeHe-khe — new— bie— dude.”
Intercom: ”DUDE!”
Intercom: ”kHEHE — PFFF— EVERQUEST, dude! NINE-NINE — HE-HE-HE! — NEWB—”
Intercom: psssss — psssss — psssss.
Intercom: ”Tam-tara-taraaaa.”
Intercom: ”tara-taaaaa.”
Intercom: ”tam-tara-tara.”
Intercom: ”taraaraaraaaaa.”
Intercom: ”TAM-TARA-TARAAAA! — TARA-TAAAAA! — TAM-TARA-TARA! - TARAARAARAAAAA!”
Intercom: ”Survive, bitches!”
Sophia: ”Psychos!”
⸻⸻x⸻⸻
People: aaaaa! aaaaa! aaaaa!
Taylor: ”Look, zombies!”
Sophia, Taylor, MC: ”I need to go to the toilet!”
Sophia, Taylor, MC: run to the toilet and change clothes in adjacent booths.
Shadow Stalker, Bugs Bugy, Superb: get into a fighting stance before hordes of zombies.
Poof! — Poof! — Poof! — Poof!
Zombies glitch and explode with lighting effects.
Leet’s shard: [DIE] [USELESS] [FUCKER] [AAAAAA] [!!!!]
Awkward pause.
⸻⸻x⸻⸻
!! Sneak attack !!
Superb: ”WHY DID YOU ATTACK ME?!”
Glory Girl with hands and clothes in bloody stains, and parts of human bones and guts in her hair: ”STOP RIGHT THERE, CRIMINAL SCUM!”
Glory Girl: uses AOE mastering effect.
Superb: ’Glory hole! Collateral Damage Barbie! Poor man Supergirl!’
Superb: ”Don’t master me!”
Glory Girl and mind-raping Panacea: ”I’m/she is not a Master! I’m/she is a Shaker!”
Bugs Bugy: ”Stop! He is a hero!”
Glory Girl: ”LIES! The Hero died!”
Bugs Bugy: ”Not THE Hero, but A hero!”
Glory Girl: ”Really? But why isn’t he dressed like a hero?!”
Panacea: ”Vicky... he wore the canonical dress of the strongest hero in the world... Almost...”
Panacea: examines Superb’s loincloth and cardboard bag outfit.
Glory Girl: ”Really? Oh! I’m so sorry, Mister hero! Um... You know that telepathy is impossible! The brainpower you’d need to interpret and decode someone’s unique neural patterns would need a head five times the usual size to contain it all. True psychics can’t exist!”
Everyone: ???
Glory Girl, awkwardly: ”Um... Aren't these ”smart words”? Amy! You said this is smart words!”
Bugs Bugy: ”Sma—”
Sweating Panacea: ”Yes, yes, it’s smart words, you beautiful and smart!”
Joyful Glory Girl: ”Thank you, Amy! I know! I know that I’m beautiful and smart! And safe.”
Superb: ”Safe?”
Glory Girl: ”YES! I’m Brute-2; Mover-2; Shaker-3! Ma says that this means I am very safe for good people!”
Glory Girl: shows everyone her beaming smile, accentuated by slightly weaker mastering.
Superb to Panacea: ”Sorry, but shouldn't you be grumpy and sarcastic?”
Panacea: puts her hands on Godzilla-sized hips placed on her freckled raccoon body hidden by a 15-dollar cotton robe with holes burnt by cigarette ash.
Panacea, grumpy and sarcastically: ”Why should I be grumpy and sarcastic?”
Superb: ”Yeah, like this.”
Panacea to MC: ”I don’t like you. And I’ll give you cancer. Joke. Ha. Ha.”
Panacea menacingly looks at MC.
Superb: ”I also don’t like PanPan.” Pause. ”But I really like cynical bitter bitch Amy! Do you want to become my best friend?!”
Panacea: ”But-but, we know each other literally a second!”
Superb: ”Bitch.”
Panacea: carefully considers whether this is enough for friendship.
Superb extends his hand to Panacea, who cautiously takes it, freezes, and spaces out.
Panacea: ’Precious! My precious! My best friend!’
Panacea, drowsily: ”Yeah, Dickhead. I will be your bestie, um— Bestie?”
Shaper: [CONFUSION] [QUERY] [DATA] [DATA]
Scion: [SHRUG] [DEPRESSION]
Shards network: [UNIMPORTANT] [WHASSUUUUUUUPP?!]
Apollyon, Abaddon, R.O.B.s, and so on: eats popcorn.
Glory Girl: ”Aww! Double date! We beyond doubt should go on a double date! For this, I will even reconcile with my boyfriend! Or not... Amy?”
Disoriented Panacea: ”You reconciled half an hour ago.”
Glory Girl: ”Thanks Amy, you are the best sister! Always have been and always will be! Then decided! See you tomorrow at the same place!”
Glory Girl takes Panacea by bridal hold, pressing the heavy-breathing Panacea’s face to her own enormous bosom and fly away.
Panacea: fifth time this day examines every millimeter of Vicky's body. Completely natural perfect body. Absolutely by chance won all lotteries lost by Crystal-who?
⸻⸻x⸻⸻
Bugs Bugy: glaring at MC.
MC brings his face close to Bugs Bugy's and whispers in her ear: ”Sorry-sorry. But I just cannot not go on this double date!
Right now Amy is just a normal abrasive teenager. Daughter of a clinically mistrustful adulteress foster mother and a very depressed foster father who once attacked Marquis in his civil-identity home and secretly adopted his daughter.
Now she’s just under pressure from her own foster mother’s fear that she — like her biological father — will also become a villain. Very overworked and insensate from everyday care for critically ill patients. Just fears her own ”just-one-hour-for-dinosaurs-extinction” biokinesis power. Feels guilty about her reluctance to alter adoptive father’s brain to cure his depression. Disgusted by intense love and passion she feels towards her non-blood related sister, who involuntarily mastered her. And so on, you know, just typical teenage drama.
But if I don’t help her, she— she will suddenly— for a completely inexplicable reason, in no way connected with the undeniable master effect of her sister's aura, going to rape her sister! And become a bad person! Selfish and abrasive Rapecea!
Therefore, it’s my duty as a transmigrator to save Amy Dallon through friendship and sex! And your duty as well! She's your main fanfiction ship! Almost sister.”
Bugs Bugy: ”Ok.”
Bugs Bugy: ’HE SO CLOSE! WHY!?! WHY DIDN'T I WASH MY SUIT YESTERDAY?!! NOW HE WILL THINK I’M SMELLY AND UNKEMPT!!!’