“If you— if you want to get off.. I don’t mind.”
For some reason, that’s what Jeongguk chooses to say.Not an “I’m sorry” or a “Should I leave?” Or anything that would be more appropriate for the situation. No, it’s “hey, you can jerk off, no biggie”
Granted, he has no idea how to even reply, just sits there with his hand on his bulge, stares at Jeongguk.
“Right.. now?”
“Yeah.” Jeongguk nods, blush dusting over his cheeks, eyes flickering between his crotch and his face. “If you.. if you want.”
He blinks a few times, doesn’t really process the information. His dick does though, it twitches in his sweats, kind of embarrassingly obvious too.
“You mean— like, right here?” He nods at the couch. “Now?”
“Yeah..” Jeongguk nods again, like this is normal. A normal evening between friends. As if friends somehow jerk off right next to each other. “I don’t mind.”
He doesn’t mind.
Doesn’t mind what exactly? Watching? Sitting next to him while he jerks off? None of this is making any sense, but Jeongguk sure looks eager; eyes all big, fixated on his crotch, as if he’s waiting for him to start.
“You.. want to watch?”He asks, ears still burning a little.
Jeongguk snaps out of it, blinks up at him, clears his throat.“Not like that. I— I mean, since I’m your crush, you could.. you know.. watch me.”
Oh.
His breath hitches, another rush of heat spreads through his body, and he has to squeeze his cock not to twitch again.
“You want me to get off on you?”
It slowly seems to dawn on Jeongguk that this is weird. This is a weird situation. He shifts on the couch, cheeks dusting a darker shade of pink.“Well you don’t have to, I just thought— I don’t know..”
Jeongguk averts his gaze then.
Fuck.He swallows, looks down at his bulge, the tent in his sweats, so fucking obvious.
“I thought it might help you— I guess.”
Jeongguk says then.
How self-sacrificial of him. He wants to sit there and look pretty for him, so he can get off.
And in a normal world, he would have politely declined and moved on. However, it’s 3 am, he’s tipsy and horny, and Jeongguk really is looking pretty tonight.So, what the hell, sure.He slowly slips his hand behind the waistband of his shorts, while Jeongguk is still looking at the floor, gnawing on his lower lip. That pretty, silver ring catches the light of the tv every now and then. His tight, black shirt hugs around his built frame, and he can only wonder if Jeongguk picked it specifically for him.“Sorry, I’m not— I’m not making any sense.” Jeongguk sighs. “I think I had too much to drink.”
Jimin licks his lips, curls his hand around his cock, doesn’t think he’s ever been this hard. Maybe when Jeongguk came all over his face last time..The remnant of that bite in his earlobe fuels his arousal, the ghost of Jeongguk’s hand sliding to his inner thigh. He bites back a moan, strokes his hand up and down his length, eyes zeroed on Jeongguk’s pretty sleeve of tattoos.Jeongguk turns his head to him then.
“Maybe I should go—“ His eyes run down, catch the movement of his hand. “—oh“
Fuck.. he’s pretty when he’s caught off guard too, lips parted like that, pink blush spreading even over his big nose.
He strokes himself a little slower, nothing much to see on the outside but the fabric of his sweats moving, and yet Jeongguk watches intensely.
It’s only after another few seconds that Jeongguk looks up at him, eyes a little wide, as if he’s shocked he’s actually doing it. As if it wasn’t his idea in the first place.“Don’t— don’t look at me like that.” He breathes out, shame rushing to his face. “You told me to do it.”
“Yeah— no I know, sorry.” Jeongguk swallows, eyes slowly trailing down again. “What— what should I do? How can I help?”
Oh he’s serious about this.“I don’t know.” He shrugs, even though there are about a million things he could list. “You came up with this, you figure it out.” The thing is, he could tell Jeongguk to help, to touch, to undress, but if it doesn’t come from Jeongguk then it just feels like he’s making him.So he just sticks to eyeing Jeongguk up and down, lingering at his pecs each way, jerks off to the memory of squeezing them, cupping them. Jeongguk’s breathing gets a little heavier, he shifts a few times on the couch, straightens his back, puffs out his chest, brushes his hair back, like he’s really trying to look pretty.
It’s sort of cute. Jeongguk has always been pretty cute actually, a loser in essence, trapped in this ridiculously hot body. Those big biceps bulging when he repositions, those big brown eyes glazing over just a little, giving away that he’s also into it.He’s never gotten off like this, always had to do with the memory of Jeongguk, a fantasy, it doesn’t feel the same. Now he can focus on the details too, like the little birthmark right under Jeongguk’s lip, the dark colour pink of his tongue when he plays with his piercings.God fuck.
His eyelids threaten to fall shut, but then Jeongguk creeps closer to him, just like at Namjoon’s place, their sides press together, hot breath fans against his ear.
Oh—
His eyes blow wide before teeth enclose around his earlobe, the gentle bite causing a storm inside of him. “Fuck—“
He squeezes around the base of his cock, tips his head back against the edge of the couch. Jeongguk darts his tongue out then, drags a hot stripe from his earlobe to the shell, kisses his helix piercing.“Good?”
Jeongguk’s voice vibrates just right, has him leaning closer to it. “Yeah.” He pants, picks up the pace again. “More.”It’s pathetic, he knows, but he needs a little more. A touch, a kiss, whatever Jeongguk is willing to give. Jeongguk hums, lips brush against his ear.“Take off your shorts.” An electric shock runs down his spine, and this time he can’t stop his dick twitching in his hand. “Fuck— okay.” He nods, lifts his hips off the couch and pulls down the waistband of his shorts.
“Underwear too.”
Jeongguk orders, when he’s not even halfway there yet.Heat licks at his face as he complies so easily, pushes both his shorts and underwear down until his hard cock slaps against his stomach, the tip flushed, a little wet.This is the first time Jeongguk sees him like this— it’s sort of nerve-wracking. Especially since it’s dead silent right next to him. When he dares to look, Jeongguk’s eyes are glued to it, cheeks and nose a deep colour pink, eyelids half-lidded, bottom lip tucked under his teeth.That’s definitely arousal. Jeongguk is into this too. This isn’t all about him. He doesn’t know if that makes it worse or better.“Fuck..”
Jeongguk breathes out then, brings his hand down to his own crotch, cups himself through the fabric. Oh fuck. This is not good. He’s not going to be able to resist at all— and Jeongguk is still dating. This is bad. And yet, when Jeongguk pushes down his own sweats and underwear right next to him, he can’t find a shred of guilt, only hot red desire in his veins at the sight of that big cock standing up straight against his stomach like that.“Thought you wanted to help me.”
He says, unable to even lift his gaze. “I’m— I am helping you.” Jeongguk curls a hand around himself, pushes his dick down and lets it slap back against his stomach a few times. “You can use this..”
His mouth pools with water, and when he finally looks up, Jeongguk is looking right at his lips.
“You can use me..”
God fuck.
He kisses Jeongguk. It’s a stupid decision, but fuck, Jeongguk’s lips are warm, slot between his own in that dirty, wet manner, tastes like arousal.“Mmh—” He tilts his head more, licks over that piercing cause he can’t help himself.Jeongguk groans softly, slips his tongue past his lips then, licks into his mouth. This is gonna end with Jeongguk inside of him. He can taste it, can feel it in the way Jeongguk uses his tongue so slow, so dirty, how deep he pushes it into his mouth, the heat of his hand curling around his waist, and the greed in which he pulls him closer. “Fuck— hyung.” Jeongguk pants, string of spit still attached to his mouth. “Use me— use my cock.”
His ears ring, and he casts his gaze down where Jeongguk is bucking his hips up into nothing, tip of his cock flushed, the head glistening so pretty— so ready to fuck something.A soft moan slips from his mouth, and he just leans down, pushes Jeongguk’s thighs further apart, wraps his lips around the head. The dirty taste of precum on his tongue has his eyes rolling back instantly.“A-ah fuck—“
Jeongguk groans.
Not even a second passes and a hand fists in his hair, pushes him down. He doesn’t mind it at all, eagerly takes Jeongguk’s entire length in his mouth.
He can pretend all he wants that this is morally wrong and that he feels bad but the truth is, he doesn’t. He doesn’t feel bad when he bobs his head around Jeongguk’s cock, there’s no guilt or shame when he coats his length in spit.
And by the sound of Jeongguk’s raspy, uncontrolled moans, he doesn’t really feel all that bad either. Maybe that’s why he tightens his grip on his hair and guides him through the motion, pulls him back up and pushes him down to take his entire length at once.
“Aah— Jimin— fuck.”
But it’s not enough. Jeongguk bucks his hips into his mouth, thrusts in harder, desperate. It’s the type of desperate that he can feel deep inside, in his gut. The type of desperate that translates to: I need more— not just your mouth.
And sure enough, Jeongguk sucks in a sharp breath, tugs on his hair hard enough to get his mouth off his cock.“fuck— Jimin— want you to sit on it.”
Yeah, there he goes.
Jimin smacks his lips together, savour the taste, then wipes it with the back of his hand.
“Yeah? To help me?”
Shit, that slipped.
Jeongguk’s eyes go a little wide, caught red-handed, and there’s no comeback either. He knows just as well as he does that this is far beyond friends helping each other out.
But for now, fine, he won’t mention it. He just stands up, takes Jeongguk’s hand and drags him with him towards his bedroom.
And Jeongguk, for all his “I’m doing this for you” eagerly gets on his bed, takes his shirt off and throws it on the floor, even opens his nightstand drawer without needing any direction.
If he wasn’t so down bad he would have made a remark, would have said something along the lines of wow, you’re such a good friend, but it kind of gets lost in big pecs and dark brown perked up nipples.
He takes his top off as well, crawls onto the bed, right next to Jeongguk, hand already on his chest before his mind can catch up; mouth around his nipple next thing.
“Mmh— fuck.” Jeongguk sucks in a sharp breath. “You like my chest that much?”
“Mm.” He squeezes it in his hand, so fucking beefy from all his workout, they need to get worshipped like this all the time. “So pretty.”
He licks over the stiffened bud one more time, then pulls back.
Jeongguk leans against the headboard, chest rising and falling fast, bottle of lube in his hand. His neck and face are flushed, cheeks shimmering with transpiration, eyes unfocused but they’re still eyeing him up and down like he can’t get enough.
“Fuck— you’re so hot.” Jeongguk groans. “I can’t believe I like dick.”
Oh.
Jimin blinks a few times.
Was that a confession?
He doesn’t get to think about it, because the next second he’s on his back, Jeongguk hovering above him, spreading his legs with his knees.
“How does this work— I can’t just— I can’t fuck you yet, right?”
“Mm, not yet.” He takes the lube from Jeongguk, opens the bottle and squirts some on his fingers. “Need to finger myself first.”
He doesn’t think it’s that mind-boggling but Jeongguk gasps, eyes running down his body.
“Fuck, you mean— there?”
“Where else?” He almost snorts, brings his hand down between his legs, aware of the intense stare when he rubs over his rim, coats it in lube. “Don’t have a pussy.”
Jeongguk moans softly, as if that turns him on, eyes slowly traveling back up until they meet his gaze.
And he’s seen Jeongguk horny before, but this is probably the worst he’s ever seen it; entire face flushed, hair a mess, lips a little swollen, that tongue running along his piercing.
Fuck.
He slips the first knuckle in, no strain at all, that’s how much lube he used.
Jeongguk leans in closer, dips his head right in the crook of his neck. Hot breath fans against his jugular, slowly travels up, until it’s barely an inch away from his ear.
“Wanna know how it feels..” Jeongguk’s voice is barely a whisper, lips brushing against his earlobe. “Wanna slip inside of you.”
A soft, surprised moan slips from his lips, that whisper turns into shivers, running down his body. He slips his finger all the way in, eyes fluttering shut.
Jeongguk bites gently in his earlobe, sends another set of shivers down his spine.
“Good, hyung?”
“Yeah— fuck.” He nods, curls his finger inside, already pushes in a second when there’s little to no strain. “So good.”
Jeongguk curses, leans back a little, eyes running down his body again, evidently hypnotised by his rim, and the way he thrusts his fingers in.
Yeah, for a straight man, this is not going so well for him. Jeongguk’s lips part, soft pants escape him just watching. He even sits back on his knees for a better view, curls a hand around his flushed cock.
“Fuck— Jimin..” Jeongguk bites on his lower lip, strokes his hand up and down. “looks so fucking hot— your fingers inside..”
When Jeongguk proposed to get off on him on the couch, he didn’t expect it would happen vice versa too. But here he is, fingering himself while Jeongguk shamelessly gets off in front of him, tugs on his pretty cock a little faster.
Years and years of fantasising don’t live up to this moment, having Jeongguk’s jaw going slack, pants and moans filling the air just from watching, the wet, rhythmic sound echoing just a little against the walls.
“Are you having a gay awakening?”
He pants, cause, fuck it.
“Yeah..” Jeongguk nods, looks like he’s on the verge of drooling. “I think I’m having a moment.”
Thank fucking god.
He teases a third finger around his rim, rubs it slowly up and down. Jeongguk’s eyes are glued to it, follow its every move, bottom lip tucked under his teeth.
Yeah, he’s gone.
If he’d known Jeongguk was into anal, he might have done this way earlier. But it seems not even Jeongguk knew, so, he can’t really blame himself.
“Fuck— hyung..” Jeongguk shifts a little closer. “Push it in.”
Fuck.
He complies, pushes his finger in alongside the other two, loves the way Jeongguk’s eyebrows furrow as if he’s feeling it too, the way his jaw drops just a little.
“Mmh—“
He throws his head back into the pillow, eyes falling closed, thrusts his fingers in deep, hard, needs to get it over with because he wants to finally sit on that cock.
A hot mouth presses against his neck then, cold piercing drags up all the way to the hinge of his jaw.
“‘S enough— right?” Jeongguk pants, kisses up to his ear, bites in his earlobe once again. “Wanna fuck you.”
“Mmh.” He leans into that heat, curls his fingers inside. “Almost.”
“Please..” Jeongguk licks over the shell of his ear. “I’m so fucking hard.”
Jimin gasps, his back arches off the mattress just a little— doesn’t know what it is about that sentence but apparently it’s doing something for him.
He slips his fingers out then, wipes the remnants of lube on the sheets, finds Jeongguk’s gaze. So heated, electric.
“You make me wait for years but you can’t even wait 2 minutes?”
It’s supposed to be a cool comeback, except well, he only realises the flaw later on.Jeongguk blinks once, twice.Oh fuck. “Did you say years— mmh”
He shuts Jeongguk up swiftly, delves his tongue into his mouth next thing. Can’t believe after years of keeping that a secret he just breathes it out like that, in the middle of sex. How cliche. “Wait— hyung—ngh.”Absolutely not. He keeps Jeongguk’s mouth occupied, moves him into another position, avoids eye contact at all cost. Every attempt to break the kiss or speak he diffuses, covers Jeongguk’s lips over and over however many times he has to, until Jeongguk groans and gives up, slides his tongue against his own, curls his hands around his hips.That’s more like it.He spreads his legs on either side of Jeongguk’s lap, brings his hand back around and guides Jeongguk’s cock to his rim.If the kiss won’t shut him up, this definitely will.As soon as the warm, wet cockhead presses against his rim, both of them groan, string of spit still connecting their lips.Jeongguk pants, looks up from under his black hair, gaze intense.“You just said years.”
Fuck, the kiss wasn’t enough then.“Oh did I?”
He breathes out, curls his arms around Jeongguk’s neck as he slowly lets himself sink down. This has to work. And for a second, it does. Jeongguk’s eyes roll back, a long, drawn-out moan escapes his lips, and he squeezes his waist tightly, pulls him down a little harder.
He holds his breath, gets dizzier by the second, inch after inch pushing inside of him, stretching him open, filling him up until he’s dumb— none of his braincells functioning anymore.
Finally.Jeongguk’s cock throbs inside of him, almost like he’s on the verge of his orgasm already. And going off his shaky inhale, he might just be.“Hyung..”Jeongguk whispers.“..Yeah?”
“You said years.”“Yeah.” He nods. “Slipped up there didn’t I?”
Jeongguk meets his gaze then, eyes twinkling in the lights. “Let’s not talk about that right now.” He lifts himself a little for good measure, sinks back down on that pretty cock. “At least fuck me hard enough so I can move on.”
Maybe cynicism is not Jeongguk’s cup of tea. Because the very next second, he’s manhandled back onto his back, and Jeongguk thrusts into him slow and deep.“fuck..” He bites his lip, the drag of Jeongguk’s cock inside so fucking good when it’s slow like this, almost makes him go cross-eyed. “Ah— fuck.”“You’re unbelievable.” Jeongguk pants, slides his warm hand down his chest, over his stomach, to his cock, and curls his fingers around it. “Hiding your feelings for years.”
“Mmh—““Pretending it’s just a crush.” Jeongguk’s voice comes closer, lips grazing his ear. “And expecting me to just— what— fuck you like a ragdoll and leave it at that?”
“That’s not—“ He can’t finish the sentence, Jeongguk’s cock pushes in so deep he sees stars, and all that comes out is a loud, unfiltered moan. “Oh my god.”
“Then what?” Jeongguk presses a kiss right behind his ear, down his neck slowly, moves his hand experimentally around his cock. “You can’t seriously think I’d let you get away with this.”
Apparently not.He blinks his eyes open, meets those dark brown eyes, face so close their noses touch, hot breath against his lips. his chest clenches, heartbeat picks up steadily with each slow thrust, each hot stroke of that big hand around his cock.
“If— if you fuck me like this I’m not recovering.” He pants softly. “I won’t get over you.”
That’s the whole thing. If Jeongguk would just fuck him hard, then he would not have to face him like this, would not have to look into his eyes, feel them burn.This pace, this touch, this proximity is all just damaging him more, even if it’s out of pity.“Good.” Jeongguk whispers, tilts his head a little more. “You don’t have to.”
Warm lips slot between his own before he can process the sentence, but when he does, he’s unable to move at all.Jeongguk doesn’t seem to mind though, mouths at his lips, rolls his hips against his own so good, twists his wrist around his cock— everything to make him feel good.He blinks, only breathes when Jeongguk pulls back.“But.. you’re— you’re still with—“
“I know.”
“And you’ve never been into—“
“I know, but this feels right.” Jeongguk nudges his nose, presses another kiss on his lips. “Feels so different..”
Oh fuck. He wishes he could hide just for a bit, but this position is just intimacy overload, Jeongguk’s body on top of his own, his face an inch away, he’s all exposed.It’s just the sex. Jeongguk has always been a romantic, he’s probably swept by the heat of the moment, lost in it. Once they’re done he’ll realise it was just that. So he just lets Jeongguk do whatever he wants, meets his every kiss, moves back on his cock, all in that perfect slow rhythm. It’s insane how well their bodies fit together, how easy it is to follow, like they’ve done it a hundred times before.He snakes his arms around that broad back, delves his tongue deeper into Jeongguk’s mouth, hooks his leg around his hip, wishes the night was longer. It’s been a hot minute since someone fucked him this well, with absolutely no rush, just deriving pleasure out of him without having to be told. They don’t even talk at all, Jeongguk is just as addicted to his lips as he is to Jeongguk’s. It’s sad that it’s only this once, and it’s sad that it’s so fucking good too, so intimate. But he’ll find a way to deal with it one way or another, he’s been doing that half his life.“Fuck— I’m gonna come..” Jeongguk pants against his mouth. “Can I—“
“Yeah.” He breathes out. “Please.” He’s just as close, pleasure coiling in his gut, every inch of him burning.Somehow even in that way, they’re in sync; as soon as Jeongguk loses rhythm, he’s fucking into Jeongguk’s hand harder, and the moment Jeongguk rams into him hard, he comes all over himself.“A-aah fuck— hyung..” Jeongguk groans, buries his face into his neck, bites down right there.“Mmh— fuck.” He scratches down Jeongguk’s back, fireworks exploding behind his eyelids. “Jeongguk..”For how soft and intimate the sex was, his orgasm feels like thunder striking through his body, cum spurting from the head with each thrust of Jeongguk riding out his own. “Fuck—“ He pants, body spasming one last time, and then he’s completely spent.
Jeongguk collapses on top of him a second later, body hot and heavy. They breathe in unison for a while.
He just stares blankly at the ceiling, little bubbles popping in his head, that’s about all that’s going on up there. Jeongguk does not make any efforts to move off of him, just buries his face back into the crook of his neck and stays there.He expects him to leave in a minute or two. He’s so ready for it, the awkward goodbye, the “it’s getting late..” A minute passes. Another minute passes.“Hyung..”
There he goes.He braces himself.“Yeah?”
“I think I’m in love with you.”
Okay.An absolute fucking curveball.Jeongguk lifts his head up, hair a mess, face still flushed, eyes all big.He blinks a few times.“I.. think that’s a bit fast—“
“No I.. I mean I— I’ve been thinking about you since the first time we kissed non-stop. Like, I couldn’t even come without thinking about you. and my girlfriend got angry cause I’d only talk about you or spent time with you, that was literally our entire argument that one time I stayed over at your place, and when you said you had a crush on me I had this weird tingling in my chest and I was so fucking happy—“
“Woah— woah, wait. Backtrack.” He holds up his hand. “You and your girlfriend had an argument about me?”
Jeongguk nods. “All the time. She’s upset that we’re close, said that it felt like you were always my first choice, that we were too touchy— well I do kind of get it now.”
Jimin looks between the two of them, literally not one inch of their bodies not touching. She might have a point.His ears gradually burn up, heartbeat going way too fast.“But if that’s.. if that’s been going on since our first kiss, why did you turn me down like that when I came to your place?”
“Oh..” Jeongguk gnaws on his lower lip. “Back then I was kind of afraid.. I just hoped it wasn’t that. You know, in this line of work.. and since we’re really close friends I was just scared it would all fuck things up.”
He blinks a few times.“I thought you were homophobic.”
“What? No way.” Jeongguk shakes his head. “Did I give off that vibe?”
“Yeah.. I mean you didn’t even dare say the word gay.” It takes Jeongguk a few seconds, as if he’s trying to figure out when exactly that was, but then he perks up.“When you told me about gay porn?” “yeah, you just avoided the word.”
“I was trying to be careful since it was really personal, I didn’t want to offend you— not cause I was scared.”
Oh.he might have misjudged. “Ah I’m sorry hyung.” Jeongguk finds his hand, intertwines their fingers. “that might have made it more difficult for you.”Okay fuck, this is really happening then. Jeongguk is not walking out on him, he is not just in it for this short moment of shared happiness he’s got actual feelings.“Are you sure you’re not just.. you know, still on your orgasm-high?”
He has to ask, out of self-preservation.Jeongguk squeezes his hand, corner of his mouth curling up.“I’m sure. But I would like another one, if you’re offering.”
He swallows, puts that comment aside for now.“I mean, you’re a 100% sure—“
“Yes I’m sure.”
Okay.His heart is beating so fast, even Jeongguk looks down at his chest, soft chuckle leaving his lips.“Wow, I’ve never really actually heard someone’s heart beat faster.”“Yeah, well.” He rolls them onto their sides, cheeks burning. “Only a million years of unrequited love getting answered. No big deal.”
Jeongguk does look somewhat apologetic now, squeezes his hand tightly.“I’ll make it up to you.”“Yeah?” A small smile makes it to his face. “How?”
“Well..” Jeongguk scoots closer to him, brings his hand to his chest. “You can use this as stress relieve for the rest of your life.”
Huh..He squeezes Jeongguk’s pec once, twice, smile growing a little.“Not bad.”
“And, I’ll give you whatever you want, the second you ask.”
He blinks up at Jeongguk, eyes immediately dragging down to his lips. They’re a little swollen from their make-out, and—
“Mmh.”
Didn’t even have to ask, Jeongguk just slots his lips between his own, tangles his hand in his hair.He sighs into it. It’s all still a little surreal, he feels like he hasn’t really come back down from his high yet, still floating.But for now, that’s exactly what he needs, Jeongguk’s soft, warm lips take away every single what if, every could have been, and every what now