Scott Pilgrim parody - Yaoi (Birthday gift to me, back to regular schedule)
Chapter 3 The Evil Ex’s
Scott didn’t have much money so they went to the church for heals. In this world you could go to either the church or the hospital for heals, though hospital heals cost money but were faster, church heals were free and took time. The church also had a respawn point, there was a special contract with joining the church giving the devote a guaranteed second chance at life, though most wanted the benefit of going to Heaven after the big Game Over.
Wallace, Scott, and Ramona went to the local Church and sat and waited for heals. “So what’s the deal with the Evil Ex’s?” He asked.
Scott was pretty messed up and Ramona looked uncomfortable. “It’s a long story.”
“We got a long wait.” Wallace held up the number.
Ramona sighed. “You don’t have to talk about it.” Scott said, trying to be kind.
“Yes she does. You got attacked for bleep sake.” Profanity filter in the House of God. “She’s been using you, so spill the tea dream girl.”
“I didn’t want to cause trouble, honest. I have had...not the best luck in love…” She twiddled her fingers. Matthew was her first ex, and after she broke up with him he turned to the dark side. “There was Lucas Lee, he was a pretty good skateboarder, and he asked me out like 100 times. I never got the vibe he was serious about anything but his persistence in dating me had me curious and so we dated. It was...pretty insignificant. He’d forget about our dates and plans, shrugging it off with a whatever. We kissed and did stuff, but it wasn’t exactly satisfying. Every time I tried to talk to him about anything he’d brush me off with a whatever.”
‘Lucas Lee...why does that name ring a bell?’ Wallace pondered.
“He kinda sounds like a jerk.”
“Yeah well, I cheated on that jerk, found the first cocky pretty boy to come along and dumped him. Not my proudest moment. He tried to brush it off with his usual whatevers but it got to him. That’s how I got into bed with Todd Ingram. I was in my bad boy phase and Todd was bad. He had Psychic powers and he abused them, but he also used them for me, if anyone messed with me he messed with them back, Students, Teachers, Faculty he didn’t care. Sometimes I felt like he crossed the line, like carving my name in the moon. He got in a lot of trouble for that, had to fix it, but I was mortified. We actually split applicably, we were going to different schools, my College of choice and he was going to an Elite Academy for Psychics. While he said he didn’t want to do the long distance thing I found out he could make portals and stuff so we could have been together if he wanted, but I heard he got with another girl a week after we split so...yeah…”
“He doesn’t sound that bad, why is he an Evil Ex?” Scott asked.
“That’s because of number seven I’m sure. Todd always wanted to be a rock star, to have the fame and power to do what he wanted. If he’s with the league he’s likely under contract which is...bad…”
“Why?”
-x-
Matthew respawned, drained and poorer than he was before but alive. He groaned and sat up in bed, he wanted to relax with a shower to refresh only to have his phone buzzing. It was Gideon.
“I’ll call him back later, I need to clear my head.” He got out of bed, and energy crackled around him. His phone kept buzzing and when Matthew didn’t answer wham, pain hit him hard. “Damn it, that damn Gideon, what kind of game is he playing at.” A sudden surge of pain washed over him, bringing him to his knees. “Damn!”
He was under contract, bound to Gideon unable to escape even in death. The man’s legal jargon even fooled the demons he had go over the contract. Some stuff he caught and amended, but losing didn’t mean the game was over. Gideon still owned him, and he’d have to support the other Evil Exes, if the need arose.
Now that he lost certain clauses kicked in, he lost the right to challenge for Ramona’s hand, but he also lost his freedom, he was essentially Gideon’s slave now, his documents, powers, abilities, finances, anything he owned was under Gideon’s control now.
He reached for the phone and picked it up. “Hello…”
“Finally you answer, I trust you understood your little lesson?” Matthew was shaking.
“Yes…”
“Good next time I call, you best pick up, or at least text me your status.” The man was an utter control freak.
“What do you want?”
“Your report, on this Pilgrim and any information you got on Ramona.”
“I’m done with this Evil Exe bullshit, I lost, Pilgrim he...he beat me I’m out.”
“Ohoho, no you aren’t done. You may have lost but you are still of use to the league. Still of use to me, you’ll make a fine guard dog.”
“Guard dog?! You want me to be some kind of pet?”
“If the collar fits.” As if on cue an energy collar formed around Matthew’s neck. It’s been there since he signed up with Gideon. “You can’t betray me, you can’t escape, you have to do what I say. It’s all in the loser clause, you lost so you belong to me.”
“Damn you I’m gonna…” His hand surged with flames, the collar sparked and Matthew’s whole body jerked as he collapsed to the floor.
“The contest for you is over, but the game is still on and you are still a piece in my control.”
Matthew got tears in his eyes. ‘Damn it...damn it…’ He’d been so arrogant, so sure he’d win he didn’t consider the consequences of losing. Gideon played him and now he’s stuck.
-x-
Ramona went on to talk about her next ex Roxie. “Not my proudest moment, I was bi curious and wanted to explore my sexuality I met Roxie and we hit it off but…”
Wallace gave her a look. “You didn’t…”
She did, she kept herself closed off while Roxie poured her heart out. Ramona began to withdraw and close herself off, even though she started having real feelings for Roxie, but her own issues with avoidance made her pull away cause things were getting serious she dismissed Roxie’s feelings as just a phase, which hurt them both. “I bailed...and she hates me…”
Scott had been bi-curious and Wallace had helped guide him through the door. Holding his hand as he explored his sexuality while dealing with the bad break up. Wallace and Scott looked at her. “I know...I know I bleeped up…cause it gets worse…”
“What did you screw a pair of brothers?” Ramona blushed. “I was kidding! No!”
“It wasn’t my proudest moment. It was the Katayanagi Twins Kyle and Ken I dated them both...at the same time…”
“Oh no…”
“Bleep girl!” Wallace said.
“They...also didn’t know I was with them at the same time.”
“Girl you broke the first rule of poly communication.” Wallace shook his head.
“They were pissed at me, and broke up with me, but they got closer after.”
Then came Gideon, the worst of them. “He was manipulative, emotionally distant, and treated me like a possession. I fell for his confidence and charm, he seemed so put together compared to the other guys I dated, I missed all the red flags. When I caught him trying to experiment on me I lost it, I kicked him in the balls and left.”
“Snap.” Wallace said.
Scott simply listened to what Ramona had to say, absorbing and processing everything. ‘She’s had a really rough love life…’ Pilgrim only had two exes, one was when he was young and they split because they couldn’t do the long distance thing it was too hard. The other was Envy Adams, he had loved her, but she used him and cheated on him, broke his heart for fun and left him for fame and fortune.
“So I ran away from him, but Gideon...with his money and influence he made it hard to escape him.”
“So you used Scott.” Wallace pointed out.
“Not my proudest moment but yes, thanks to Scott’s ability I was able to escape. Last I heard he formed the League of Evil Exes to try and force me into submission, anyone I dated or wanted to date would have to defeat my Exes.”
“But we aren’t even dating.” Scott said.
“I know, I know…” She buried her face in her hands. “I thought if we were just friends it’d be fine, but…”
“Your ex is a psycho piece of crap?” Wallace said.
“Yeah…” She stood up. “Look I’m not gonna make this your problem.”
“Bit late for that.”
“Wallace!” Scott nudged him.
“It’s true, he took down one of your exes if this league thing is happening, you think he’s gonna be allowed to just walk away?”
“I didn’t want this to happen!”
“Then don’t run.” She looked at Scott.
“What?”
“Stand your ground, if you leave now you’ll always be running. Face your past, and I’ll help you.”
“Why would you help me?”
“Yeah, why would you help her?!” Wallace didn’t like this.
“Because not that long ago I went through a bad break up, she lied to me, used me, and cheated on me. She hurt me and I was broken. Someone helped me put the pieces back together and helped me out.” Wallace blushed. “So let me help you.”
Ramona sat down and their number got called and he got healed, two males one with pink hair the other with purple did the healing. “Ya know, you could have healed yourself right?”
“Huh?”
“Like totally you got the power.”
Wallace checked Scott’s stats. “Holy bleep Scott.”
Witchcraft Skill Tree had been unlocked and since Scott dumped all his points in a lot unlocked at once.
Elementalist: Earth, Wind, Fire, Water, Lightning, Wood, Ice.
Taming: Animals, Bugs, Cryptids,
Recovery: Heal, Cure, Purify
Abomination: Ooze
Unique: Bardic, Spacial
This was what he unlocked when he dumped his points in, and what he gained given his own natural sets. Bardic because of his musical talents and Spacial because of his ability. There was still more to the tree he could unlock with more points. Oracle, Illusionist, Construction, Potion, Detention, Wild, were branches of witch craft he had yet to unlock.
Under Elements there was still Moon, Shadow, Light, Metal magic to still unlock. Under Taming: Ghosts, Angels, Demons, and even Humans were options. He could manipulate space but Time magic was a big ticket item on the tree. “I think your chances of facing Ramona’s evil Exes just got better.”
To be continued...Playing With MagicWallace and Scott go home for the day, and Scott practices some of his magic. It might seem like just playing but it’s helping Scott get a feel for his new abilities.