hi! i hope you're all doing well, and apologies for the radio silence on here lately from here.. if you haven't seen my blog post from back in March, and been wondering what the hell's been going on with me, long story short is: mental health wasn't doing super great because of [Current Living Situation], so for that reason as well as Others, i took a month off to go out of state and Be a Person exclusively, outside of working on some commissions. i am now back from that trip (which went very well!!!), and in that time, i've been able to do a lot of thinking on how to re-approach my Situation(s) and where to go from "here." for one thing, what i've said regarding a change to my living situation being due is still very much the case. as i'm writing this, i've got plenty of Potential options for how that may go, and one in particular that looks most likely. i won't mention this too much more though, until well after i've already made the move. all i can say is i'm very intent on this being done within the year, and for it to be a quick/smooth move when it DOES happen. also my current situation and how i'm trying to approach and exist in it, has already been improving considerably, so i can tell you that this is not a situation where i need to be in a rush, thank fucking god. if anything, i've just got some Adulting Things to take care of over the next few months, but it won't take away too much from my work. now as for how this affects The Projects: what i've said in the blog post mostly still stands. i think while it's going to be much easier to balance stuff now that i have a plan to get out, i'm still very intent on prioritizing game development + commissions for the time being. ideally i'd still like to do a bit of that AND youtube, and i may be more able to pull that off currently, but until further notice (i.e. until you basically see me Post About DR&t4W Again Unprompted), i'm probably going to be under the hood for a while at something else, and even people in star tier may start hearing more about that in lieu of not much Substantial to speak of on the youtube end. also, i have a lot of commissions to finish that i took during my month off, so that's getting done first.
so, it's looking something like commissions first, personal work second, maybe youtube or something else mixed in there after enough time doing only the second thing. sounds like a pretty good plan, i think?...this feels like the year so far of getting difficult, expensive, stressful shit done that i knew needed to be done for a long time. between the new computer upgrade, sorting my financials out and taking the larger steps into Being independent, planning on fucking MOVING????? i feel bad just how much has been awry on my end. i know i'm a person first and creator second, so i shouldn't feel bad for like, having a life, right? but in my mind i've kinda always just felt like a vessel for my characters to speak through. ultimately, i just want to make cool things and only in my own weird way, regardless of what i go through to make that happen. i kind of like to think right now that what i made in 2023-24 was the first real demonstration of my ability when left unhinged, but only by so much. i was limited by being far away physically from my friends, by not having my own car or home, by not having as much control over my time management as i would have liked to hope i did. the very least i can say is that now that i know roughly when my next moves IRL will happen, i should be able to think a lot more about my projects again from here on. it's basically a waiting game for most of it from here. even my biggest changes in my personal life, in large part, are so that i can make my projects easier to make Happen. and in no small part, that is because i have the support of y'all in every sense to help back all of this up. i hope to repay you for your patience. i'll continue updating y'all once there's anything substantial to speak of, or of course, any more progress/updates on benefits and such on here. for all i know, the momentum may just come back to me entirely! but let's take it a few steps at a time for now.
much love, and take care <3